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Lfaor1320 t1_ixkrdub wrote

Reply to comment by softshivers in untitled, me, color pencil, 2022 by softshivers

How do you heal when you don’t know yourself without the pain?

I mean this earnestly, I feel the same and have been in therapy for a decade but I don’t see who I can be without the trauma.

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softshivers OP t1_ixkv57y wrote

u have to embrace the pain. hold and nurse it like a baby. what happened to us happened, nothing can change that. there is no point holding onto fantasies of “what ifs”. we are who we are, partly because of what happened to us. it’s about coming to terms with it and accepting the past whilst also realising that u are firmly grounded in the present. the past can only hurt u as much as u allow it to. that’s the hard truth. i really do wish u all the best <3

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DeannaZone t1_ixl492i wrote

My therapist noted that I hid my favorite baby doll because I was afraid of her getting hurt, she had me go and hold her and take care of her, as if it was me, and promise to keep her and me safe, it has helped over the years.

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Lfaor1320 t1_ixkwku2 wrote

Thanks! I have a hard time accepting the pain and feeling broken as a result. Hopefully I will be more content one day.

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cynicaloptimissus t1_ixkto7j wrote

Kind of a rhetorical question cos I don't know how many of us trauma survivors have figured that out.

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Lfaor1320 t1_ixkuy9c wrote

Nope actually specifically directed to the OP who claimed to be healing.

I’m genuinely curious/eager to heal.

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