why do you call men "guys" and "men", but call women "female" or "females"?

Only using "female" for "women" makes sense if you also refer to human men as males (like in a medical, scientific or military context), but does not in context where "female" is not used that way and makes even less sense when you use humanifying words for men and dehumanizing words for women in the same three lines.

Maybe call women women. It's a few characters fewer than female/females.