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moistest_bum t1_iuk03wq wrote

A proponent of the MeToo movement.

5

PracticalConflict737 t1_iuk06ae wrote

Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle.

The frog hopped into the princess' lap and said "Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome price, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young price that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and setup housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so."

That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on a repast of lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled to herself and thought: "I don't fucking think so!"

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justmorescreens t1_iuk0dj5 wrote

Damn, you actually got my mouth watering for frog, you wordsmith you.

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Sarged117 t1_iuk04hg wrote

A slightly more disgusting frog.

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Small-Ad-2948 t1_iuk0abc wrote

A tadpole. The Benjamin button method

2

Other-Marketing-6167 t1_iuk0zhd wrote

Depending on how much tongue I get, either a good friend or a girl friend.

2

JustinChristoph t1_iuk1a8d wrote

A scarred shitless frog who thought I was going to eat it for bringing my mouth that close to it.

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IndigoTrailsToo t1_iuk7c0j wrote

A doggie!!!!

I don't need no man.

But I'd love another dog!

2

InconvenientHummus t1_iuk014m wrote

A different species of frog, randomly assigned with each kiss.

1

Thee_Mad_Catter t1_iuk0e48 wrote

Fried frog legs. They're pretty good. Taste like chicken

1

Flaky-Fellatio t1_iuk68fn wrote

Big ol' tiddy blonde with legs to tomorrow

1