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CallMeAccoru t1_iyewtqy wrote

Ask him to elaborate, it could be a kind but clumsily expressed feeling, or he could be a prick, we don't know

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normallystrange85 t1_iyeyv0t wrote

Context is important. All these people are saying "run" because he gave a weird/bad compliment. It could be anything between "I like the quality time that we spend together and appreciate that you put forward effort to make it happen." and "I'm glad you seek my validation because it means I don't have to try".

We got one point of data reddit. We need more than one to draw a line.

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Wizard_of_Claus t1_iyewvdf wrote

Totally depends on the context really. It could be that he just doesn't see himself as a lady's man and is happy you like him for who he is. Or it could be that he's going to be super controlling and will flip out if you attention goes elsewhere.

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the_bollo t1_iyey4fz wrote

Man, lots of people jumping to conclusions here. It's possible that they're just attention starved so it's nice to feel like someone is prioritizing them. Women get SO many more compliments, comments, etc. than men on average and it can take a toll. An old lady called me handsome in the grocery store like 3 years ago and it still pops into my mind because it's so rare to get comments as a man.

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iceyhot80 t1_iyezq6y wrote

Look. A lot of men are starved for attention. Aren't feeling heard or seen. So when we receive it. We appreciate it. And want to keep the person that's actually seeing us around.

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DeskIcy9162 t1_iyewpyp wrote

He doesn't like you, he's just lonely. The amount of girls I've liked strictly because they gave me attention and I was in a bad place mentally is astounding

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[deleted] OP t1_iyf2f9a wrote

I'm pretty sure my cat feels the same way tbh

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gymfreak6969 t1_iyewnjj wrote

No need to run

Maybe that guy is a loner

Or treated like an outcast throughout his life

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Made-of-spite t1_iyewwgc wrote

Sounds sweet, in an awkward sort of way

Could be a red flag in context but out of context I wouldn't say it's intrinsically a reason to run

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proactivepistachio t1_iyeylmy wrote

Asholes don't say it out loud. Probably just what the man said he likes that you give him attention and probably doesn't realize that it sounds like that is the only thing he likes in you.

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WertyTheGamerYT t1_iyewqgb wrote

It could be a really weird way of saying your the only person who cares about me?

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chyrysler300 t1_iyeyigx wrote

I'd like it if a lady paid me attention. Good start to a beutiful relationship. Imagine if she didn't even acknowledge me.

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RealBlackHair t1_iyey958 wrote

First of all you need to understand that your reaction to something isn't "It's a good thing" or "I need to run". There is a huge spectrum of possibilities between those two statements.

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LukeTheGroundwalker t1_iyeyqo7 wrote

It depends, he could just be lonely and in a bad place mentally so he will take anyone that gives him attention or hes clumsy at expressing feelings.

Ask him to elaborate

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TorsionDifferential t1_iyex6h3 wrote

If it's the only positive thing he says, he needs help, and you don't need to be on the hook for it. It doesn't necessarily mean you should run, but consider that in a relationship you might be responsible for almost all of his happiness and comfort and validation.

If it's one thing he says among a bunch of other things, such as other positive things about you, especially if they're specific to you and wouldn't necessarily apply to anyone who gave him attention, then it's not necessarily problematic.

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Puzzled-Surprise-250 t1_iyeyryy wrote

*Disclaimer: I’m not a man.

This. Does he also like YOU or just the attention you give? Because if it’s not you, one day he’ll find someone he likes and leave you to pursue them. I like when people I’m interested in keep in touch frequently, but I would never word it as “I like you BECAUSE you give me attention.”

I think if you had to ask you already know the answer. He’s stating in not so many words that he likes feeling desired. It’s an ego boost in his offseason. I say run.

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Complx_Redditor t1_iyeyavl wrote

Means he doesn't get attention elsewhere.

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HarrietHedwig t1_iyeykw4 wrote

You can’t resume a whole relationship on that phrase, it depends on a lot of things, specially context. Some people are really bad expressing them selves too.

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YourCasualSuppressor t1_iyexznx wrote

What does your general gut feeling tell you? He could be alone and starved for attention so that's just a statement but he could also be narcissistic and say that because you provide attention he likes, but that he not necessarily likes you. Or anything in between. That's where I'd say listen to your gut, if you feel he's a good guy, maybe he just appreciates the fact that you pay attention to him and that doesn't happen so often to him or in ways that are not suitable for his understanding of attention. If you feel he's a bad guy and you can see that the way he treats other people is shitty it's maybe leaning towards him being an asshole

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RealBlackHair t1_iyeypf1 wrote

He could like you, obviously he might not. Those saying they know based on this one thing are lying to you. He might have meant "I like you because I feel you listen to me and genuinely want to spend time with me" or he could mean "I'm lonely and you're easy". I reiterate, no one, not me or any of the other bozos in this comment section know which one he meant, because none of us have every met him.

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Ok_Topic999 t1_iyez2mx wrote

I get mostly ignored which I like because most people around me are assholes but it's nice to get attention from decent people

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Ok_Topic999 t1_iyezg6o wrote

Also he might struggle with talking and this is his attempt at sharing his feelings

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bush84 t1_iyf09xd wrote

Please elaborate, when did he say it? What were you talking about? Are you dating? Drunk? Face to face or via text?

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ProfessorB83 t1_iyf1leu wrote

Paying attention to someone is a good thing. I notice it, might have articulated it a bit better.

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JaiC t1_iyf5rrv wrote

Context. Use judgement. Objectively analyze how he treats you. Could just be an honest expression. It's no secret that men are largely starved for attention in Western society. Unless he's the 6'3" trust-fund-baby "legacy" captain of the football team...there's a fair chance he's just glad to have someone who looks at him as something other than a money-making device.

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Degenerate-Loverboy t1_iyf7mnd wrote

I don’t think it’s a bad thing at all… in all honesty men in certain cases just aren’t looked after well in a lot of cases . At least my past three relationships have been some sort of abusive and the one I’m in now is beyond amazing. And I said something similar like “your nice to me” and that’s serious! Kindness is a huge part of a relationship for me

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TisIChenoir t1_iyf9c20 wrote

Honestly, it seems earnest. Most men are starved of attentiok, and they long for someone actually caring for them and, you know, pay attention to them.

So, it's his way of acknowledging that you fulfill one of his needs. Which, if you want a good relationship with someone, striving to fulfill one another's needs is pretty important if you ask me.

3

Cuss-Mustard t1_iyfa7qc wrote

That's a good sign. Y'all really look for any reason to turn a man down. Figure it out like we have to

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screw5ton t1_iyfdg3r wrote

I'd say a good thing. A lot of women nowadays are flaky. It's attractive to find a woman who has integrity and participates in a relationship.

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Horror-Position1371 t1_iyex9yb wrote

Just talk lil more and make sure if he is genuine or faking it. Because we can't judge guy by this line. He can be anyone a Clever f boy or a genuine lover of your attention or care

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[deleted] OP t1_iyeywe4 wrote

Needs explanation

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Mindless-Call4250 t1_iyezq65 wrote

I told him i think he only likes me because he knows i like him more, then he said “oh no, i like you because you give me attention, and i think you dont lie to me”

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[deleted] OP t1_iyf0cml wrote

How old are you?? I mean most guys do really love it when a girl gives attention but if he gives you the same amount Back I don’t see anything wrong with it outside of maybe wording things more romantically

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CyanDocs t1_iyf24qg wrote

That sort of turns around the context to positive for me. If he'd only said it in return to maybe a "why do you like me" then I would say he just likes the fact that you like him. But I think it being a reassurance says it's more like, you give him the time of day. Which is cute. Obviously beyond that I don't know what he's like but in that particular context, I wouldn't take it as a red flag. But yeah just talk it out, it seems like maybe you've got some of your own insecurities about the relationship or yourself- not trying to be judgemental, of course, it's totally normal!

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MedievalFox31 t1_iyf2okr wrote

Really depends on the guy, right? If you like him, run (into his loving arms) if not, better run for your life 😅

2

Flaky-Fellatio t1_iyf33z8 wrote

Ugghh not completely sure honestly. Could be bad but could be nothing too. Just ask him what he means by that.

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Godtheamoeba t1_iyf5kxt wrote

Uh run unless you don’t care when someone else gives them attention so they like them

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RareCanOfBeans t1_iyf8ptv wrote

Why can’t you people just communicate with your partners instead of asking Reddit? Seriously this is rediculous

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shadow02468 t1_iyfe0ug wrote

Good, no one cares sbout men, he probaly has no friends or family as good as you

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EratoAmused t1_iyeymb3 wrote

Yeah, there’s nothing unconditional about that statement. Sounds rather transactional. But more context is needed to know for sure.

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ohlooord t1_iyf4kg4 wrote

I’d say contest is key. But I’d also say a huge amount of males don’t get any sort of live or compassion ever. Or he’s a psycho.

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Smellmyhand t1_iyf4v96 wrote

Please run. I’ve been that guy before. You do not want to be with that guy.

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Louanne80 t1_iyf692t wrote

Does he have Mommy issues? Why does he need so much attention?

1

sleepingfox307 t1_iyf99el wrote

Given how affection-starved men can be in this day and age I'd give it the benefit of the doubt, but without a lot more context we can't really yell you

1

AlbinoShavedGorilla t1_iyfa1l5 wrote

Yeah OP sounds like a red flag you should probably slit his throat while he sleeps just to be safe

/j

1

DisposableMale76 t1_iyfd55e wrote

I think the guy should run in this case. You took what he said completely out of context and made it sound 100 times worse.

1

Jail_Chris_Brown t1_iyeykx8 wrote

It means that you giving him attention is a thing he likes about you. If it is the sole thing he deems likeable about you or rather the only thing he desires in someone, then run. If it's just one thing among many, then it's not necessarily a red flag.

Many men receive barely any compliment throughouts their whole life, which is why they remember the few ones they got. Some men don't even receive attention (loners, outcasts etc.), so just your attention will be a light in the dark to them.

Though, I'd say in most cases it's a red flag.

0

Caturix6 t1_iyf6ydx wrote

That's a weird thing to say to someone

0

Why_you_asking_bud t1_iyexitq wrote

This is not a good sign. His compliment to you is that you are there... Not even that you were comforting, intellegent, pleasant to be around. Just there

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continue1234321 t1_iyextwr wrote

Run OFC. He doesn't like you for you. He likes the attention. Attention can come from anyone. Attention is not love.

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softbasalcell t1_iyf00ye wrote

Exactly that. He doesn't like you for you, he likes the attention from you and gow it makes him feel better about himself

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Material-Cat-315 t1_iyf1sad wrote

Is this common or something? Seems odd to me. Doesn't sound like a valid reason to like somebody.

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RiotandRuin t1_iyex1pn wrote

Run. Yeah that's just not great. Haha.

He should like you because of things that make you special, not because you acknowledge his existence.

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JeeringNine t1_iyexypk wrote

Run. It means he doesn’t like you for you, he just has no other options.

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