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LucyDanger_ t1_j2fv77o wrote

ER nurse here. Go to the ER now. Seriously. We've seen worse. Really.

90

Frequent_Minimum4871 t1_j2fxmws wrote

#PLEASE TELL US MORE! 🤩

*I heard a story long ago from a nurse she said they keep a box containing all the things collected over the years (as majority simply leave without collecting belongings afterwards)

She said they let the NEW nurses pick a prize from the box as an initiation 🤣

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ChrisVonae t1_j2fvek9 wrote

Which end was inserted? The bottle neck or base? 🤔

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RomanticBeyondBelief t1_j2fvms4 wrote

Asking the important questions ^

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RomanticBeyondBelief t1_j2fuw3o wrote

shake your booty, make that cork pop, and shoot it from your butt like a projectile with the pressure of the fizz

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RawPeanut99 t1_j2fv7vj wrote

Yes, but what if the pressure decided the path of least resistance is up?! Vomiting your poop isn't a favourable outcome!

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janice-mericson t1_j2fv98m wrote

At an ER.. I’ve seen this occur more times than I can count. Just don’t take it out yourself if it’s completely in, for the love of god.

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InformalJacket260 t1_j2fxhbu wrote

What concerns me is how many different ER techs have all said many similar stories…. The orgasm must be amazing if people keep doing it

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MeshuganaSmurf t1_j2fxbl6 wrote

>completely in

..... I'm having a hard time imagining the physics of this.

Please don't enlighten me

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Bodega177013 t1_j2fx750 wrote

Why not take it out themself? Don't plan on having a bottle up my ass lol, just eager to ask someone who deals with this on the reg apparently.

1

spylican t1_j2fvagx wrote

Tie one end of a rope to the bottle and the other to a doorknob then slam the door.

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monteqzuma t1_j2fvtnm wrote

Put a mouse up your rectum to chew on the cork until it releases the pressure to release the bottle, then send in a cat to chase the mouse out. Duh

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CodIndividual5450 t1_j2fw8sz wrote

OP is celebrating the New Year the right way, i see.

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breaktime1 t1_j2fuv53 wrote

Smash it and poop out the glass

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Foxxyywoxxyy t1_j2fw5xg wrote

Some guy actually did this then died 😭😂

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WhatsTh3Deali0 t1_j2fxnb2 wrote

If you're referring to 1man1jar, he lived, and then did an interview later

2

Buford1991 t1_j2fvihl wrote

Hospital because the suction will rip your intestines out if you pull too hard.

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xmachinaxxx t1_j2fvmm5 wrote

You don’t. It’s part of you now.

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bettram77 t1_j2fvofw wrote

Drink more champagne and do the biggest fart,good luck old chap!

3

Bak3904 t1_j2fvz0p wrote

I will say but I got some questions first

3

chookine123 t1_j2fuy3h wrote

break it. all the little shards will fall out

2

KainHighwind57 t1_j2fve94 wrote

Trying to recreate 1 guy 1 jar I see.

2

The-Ink_Demon t1_j2fvu0s wrote

I feel like that question is best answered by a doctor. Please locate a local er to ensure whoever the sufferer is may receive proper care for its removal

2

Trick_Machinez t1_j2fvxjo wrote

another option is to tie a string to it and attach it to someone’s tow bar and get them to drive off and hope for the best

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Due-Broccoli-4164 t1_j2fvzyc wrote

someone must put a very long straw through your mouth, throat and gut into the champagne and push some air to the champagne. it will create bubbles and create a force similar to a rocket.

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PurgaznNings t1_j2fwgiv wrote

Please go to the ER. They see crazy shit everyday. I think that won't shock them.

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Trillium19 t1_j2fwtz5 wrote

The ER is the only way. They won’t even be phased.

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tinfoil3346 t1_j2fx88q wrote

Go to the ER and have a doctor do it. Don't attempt to do it yourself.

2

Ok-Bed-6832 t1_j2fx8ip wrote

who hasn’t been there before 🤣👍 i’ve found the best method is sticking another one in to push bottle 1 farther into the colon! good luck

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Salty_Jalapeno t1_j2fxeej wrote

Are you sure its not a small cilinder stuck inside another, slightly larger cilinder...

2

olddoc1 t1_j2fuu0x wrote

Pull it out the anus

1

That_gamer6969 t1_j2fuveq wrote

Why

What are you planning

1

Fit_Bass_8961 t1_j2fwzmc wrote

I'm worried his plan has already gone south and he didn't think of plan b

1

MeshuganaSmurf t1_j2fxi8e wrote

I'm not an expert but I don't think plan B works on champagne bottles

2

YoshiMob t1_j2fuyo3 wrote

Use a plunger, old chap.

1

jas656 t1_j2fuznq wrote

You squeeze a surgical balloon in past it and inflate it, and then pull the whole lot out with a string.

Saw it on a TV show once.

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Trick_Machinez t1_j2fvnn6 wrote

your best option is to push it all the way in and let your stomach do the rest

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emma7734 t1_j2fvxs4 wrote

Don’t pull it out. Push it through.

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Diedrogen t1_j2fw4fx wrote

Asking for yourself or a friend?

1

Jack41tack t1_j2fw502 wrote

I’m intrigued but, find an alcoholic and they should remove the bottle and drink it

1

Able-Telephone4541 t1_j2fwfjw wrote

Put it in the bottle return machine and let the machine do the rest

1

JunkFlyGuy t1_j2fwld2 wrote

Saber. It’s the fancy choice.

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i_c_l_a_i_r_e t1_j2fwruu wrote

With a bit of lube and a good time.

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Joelgerson t1_j2fwvz8 wrote

Saber it. Do it fast.

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Gotosp4c3 t1_j2fwy47 wrote

Dude. What did you do?

1

guywhomightbewrong t1_j2fx27q wrote

My first answer to remove it is to never insert it in the first place. But I’d think the safest way is to break the glass at the bottom of the bottle to release pressure the pull the bottle out but the cork is probably coming off so hospital after that. The biggest flaw in this is breaking the glass without fucking yourself up

1

Ranger188c t1_j2fx8tt wrote

Remove the cork. Fart in the bottle it will fly out. You're welcome!

1

Rakkachi t1_j2fxgsz wrote

Bro..., you didnt..?

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tacobot2 t1_j2fxlim wrote

Have the gerbil eat the cork

1