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mintccicecream t1_itgpwhy wrote

Does anyone have any opinion on CT public Vs private schools?

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virtualchoirboy t1_itgs6yh wrote

From past experience when my kids were in school, private will always "rate" better because they can decline to enroll children that would add stress to their system (i.e, ESL, those with physical or learning disabilities, etc). Thus, the kids that are enrolled do better on standardized tests and moving on to higher education. This makes it seem like the private schools are "better", but it's simply because they are choosy about the students enrolled. Public school has no choice but to take everyone the private schools reject.

My kids went public and have done better than some of their friends that went private. I firmly believe a part of their success was that my wife and I were involved parents. We made school a priority and we were available to help them where necessary. We went to meet the teacher nights. We went to parent teacher conferences. We didn't assume that our kids could do no wrong either. If they messed up, they had to accept responsibility and we'd help them figure out how to move forward.

And from the teachers we talked to, parent involvement is one of the biggest factors that influence how well a child does in school. If the parents don't care, the kids won't care.

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stlouisbrowns t1_itgtort wrote

Additionally, public schools require teachers to have master's degrees, to complete intensive programs to attain certification, to earn CEU's through continued staff development throughout their careers, and to teach to established skills standards.

Private schools make no such requirements of their teachers.

The one private school requirement I've seen, which is never spoken, is that the applicant come from a private school background. No Townies Need Apply.

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mintccicecream t1_itgtwd0 wrote

Oh wow! I did not know this. Does it apply to only high school or is it all grade levels? I am from the south and this was definitely not a thing. I see a lot of girls from my old high school graduate from college and immediately start teaching. This is great information, thanks so much!

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fatherfatpants t1_ith3gzu wrote

What u/stlouisbrowns said is mostly correct, but you can start teaching with your bachelors but are expected to get your masters in pretty short order. This applies to all grade levels.

CT is pretty awesome like that and why even our shitty schools are better than mid-tier schools in many other states.

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stlouisbrowns t1_itijk0t wrote

Thanks for that clarification /u/fatherfatpants -- yes you can start under for example a DSAP - District Shortage Area Permit - and have a bachelor's only, but then you still have to go through their intensive certification program (it was called BEST when I went through it, not sure what it's called now) and you're expected to get your Masters within a few years. It's intense. Just teaching, doing it well, with all the reflection etc involved, is exhausting in and of itself.

Totally worth it though.

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roo-ster t1_itj2qle wrote

> you can start teaching with your bachelors but are expected to get your masters in pretty short order. This applies to all grade levels.

This is true of public schools. Private schools in CT have to be periodically accredited but they're able to set their own standards for teachers.

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fatherfatpants t1_itj3bve wrote

Right, which is why I said that stlouisbrowns is mostly correct. They just missed the part about being able to start with your bachelors and what grade levels it applied to.

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roo-ster t1_itj45dx wrote

Private school teachers in CT don't need to be certified or have a masters degree, or be working towards one. Each school sets the qualifications for their teachers.

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fatherfatpants t1_itj8aed wrote

We were talking about public school and they had already indicated that private schools have a different set of rules.

No one is disagreeing with you, just pointing out its already been said.

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husky429 t1_ithrq39 wrote

You start teaching with a bachelors. Need a Master's within 7 years or so to keep your license.

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mintccicecream t1_itgsx09 wrote

Thank you!! This was really insightful. My husband and I both attended public school and are now doing well for ourselves. Was wondering if private schools would make a significant difference, but this answered my question for sure. I’m thinking we will end up investing in a home in a good town with a good school district instead of shelling out money for private. Thanks so much!

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WhittlingDan t1_itiyhhd wrote

Save the money and spend some of it on high quality tutors. Spend the rest of it creating rewards and incentives for your child that carry him or her through high school at a minimum but college too if possible.

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Time_Yam301 t1_itjppqp wrote

This. I needed a math tutor in high school. Only truly elite boarding schools provide that kind of individualized attention. Regular private schools do not, at all.

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76before84 t1_itm3r2c wrote

It really depends on the public schools as well. A lot of towns have great public schools where it makes it not worth it to pay for private. But it also shows in your property taxes as well.

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IndicationOver OP t1_ithtooh wrote

I'm from Middletown so I know people who went to both Mercy and Xavier High School along with Middletown High.......all of those who went to college after they are in the same socioeconomic spectrum. Of course public or private some kids are going to be higher achievers.

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johnsonutah t1_itgrmrj wrote

Entirely depends on the town. Darien, Westport, New Canaan etc in Fairfield county, no need to private school. Same for farmington, Glastonbury, and some other towns in central ct.

Cities - need to go magnate or private

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GoPikachuGo1 t1_itimmdb wrote

Pretty much this.

Would never send my kids to public school in Bridgeport, NH, Norwalk, Stamford, etc.

People who claim these are good schools are frankly in denial.

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mintccicecream t1_itgs1t8 wrote

Thank you! Would there be any benefit to sending kids to a private school if we did decide to settle down in one of those towns?

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fatherfatpants t1_ith3upy wrote

The only real difference (outside of religious schools) is that they are inevitably going to rub elbows and maybe even befriend the kid of someone with connections. Very often connections give people huge boosts in life.

That said public schools in those towns are great and I very much doubt that the level of education will be much, if at all, different.

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IndicationOver OP t1_ithuiun wrote

>Very often connections give people huge boosts in life.

100% true, I don't know why people downplay where one goes to University for this very reason.

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Time_Yam301 t1_itjq484 wrote

Because it really only applies to a few select schools. For high school, there are only a few in CT - but probably more than any other state. At the college level, also perhaps a few nationally. Maybe 20 at best.

If you go to Choate and Yale, great. But that's rare.

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76before84 t1_itm4wh9 wrote

That's the whole premise of ivy league schools and why I support a degree of legacy acceptance.

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mintccicecream t1_ith6e3w wrote

Both of your comments are great takes! To be frank, I feel that I am well connected considering my parents weren’t and I worked my way up(although you don’t know what you don’t know so I’m 100% sure there are much better connections out there). For now, I think it would be better to invest in extracurriculars and spend quality time with my future kids/guide them academically to ensure that they become good people. I think I would honestly be embarrassed to be the poorest parent at a private school, but maybe my opinion will change later.

Thank you so much for your insight!

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johnsonutah t1_ithcxbf wrote

If you settle in one of the Fairfield county towns I mentioned then no point to private school, as the public schools in those towns are among the best in the nation and better than many private schools. The only thing “better” IMO are elite New England boarding schools (eg Choate, Loomis Chaffee, Pomfret, Andover, Exeter etc). Those schools cost as much as college and your child most likely will not get the best experience unless they live there as a boarding student.

If you settle in Avon, Farmington, Glastonbury, Simsbury, West Hartford etc I would still argue that private school is not worth it because these are excellent school systems. An involved parent + these school systems + eyes wide open on how the college process works results in great education and optimal college outcome. I would definitely take these schools over generic private schools or religious private schools (from an education and community perspective).

Id also say that there are other towns with “average” school systems that are good relative to the rest of the country, and with involved parents kids will get a great education still and can indeed land at top colleges.

I saw someone below mentioned attending an Ivy League feeder private school - I also did. The education was great, but it cost so much that I couldn’t afford to attend an Ivy League and had to seek a scholarship elsewhere (just something to consider…)

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mintccicecream t1_ithdy6s wrote

Thank you :) that is great insight. Fairfield County seems like the perfect place to settle down honestly.

The people on this sub are great and so informative! I’m really grateful.

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IndicationOver OP t1_ithu8dr wrote

>Fairfield County seems like the perfect place to settle down honestly.

Literally probably one if not the best places to reside in USA.

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notbad2u t1_iti09m7 wrote

Yes it just costs a lot. It's like a Rolls Royce, it's great area car if you have the money but you don't want that used one from ebay.

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curbthemeplays t1_itly9mm wrote

Completely ignoring whole counties of the state with excellent schools?

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johnsonutah t1_itlyjjb wrote

Not following - we don’t have county school systems in CT, they are town by town. I listed some of the best school districts by town - the list is not intended to be all encompassing.

What are some lesser known excellent towns for school systems?

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curbthemeplays t1_itlzvy5 wrote

I wouldn’t say they’re lesser known. There’s excellent schools outside central CT (Hartford County) and FFC. Example, New Haven County has Woodbridge/Orange/Bethany, Madison, Guilford, Southbury.

As an aside, even the “next rung down” schools are pretty good. They don’t need sparkling test scores to be a place to get a great education.

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johnsonutah t1_itm5y5y wrote

Yeah I guess in my head I know those schools aren’t in FFC but I sort of group them into that southern portion of the state

What are some of the next rung down schools?

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curbthemeplays t1_itm7ivv wrote

Like Bethel, Milford, Branford, North Haven, Oxford, Southington, etc.

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mayaic t1_ith9jrz wrote

Just to offer a differing opinion, I went to both public and private school in CT. My private school changed my life. The opportunities I got would not have happened in public school and I fully believe my private school led me to the Ivy League and gave me a much more enjoyable high school experience than I would’ve had in my public schools.

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mintccicecream t1_ithai57 wrote

Thank you for this take! It is definitely something to consider. May I ask if you went to a private school when you were older only, and was it an Ivy feeder school?

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mayaic t1_ithao5n wrote

Yes, I went to a public school for kindergarten - 8th and then private school for high school. It was Hopkins in New Haven which yes is a feeder to Yale. But I didn’t go to Yale, different Ivy.

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mintccicecream t1_ithb19e wrote

Wow, congrats on that! Did you feel left out by the kids that had gone to private school their whole life?

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mayaic t1_ithbed8 wrote

At times, but it was my own internal monologue. The other students didn’t make comments on it. Hopkins definitely had its own feeder schools and actually starts in 7th grade, so there were kids there who had gone to school together their whole lives. But the grades double in size in the high school so half of the kids were also just starting. I say that the school integrated us all well and I had classes with everyone and by the end, my friend groups were definitely mixed of those who started at all different points.

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mintccicecream t1_ithca4y wrote

Thank you! I personally went to a school in the south that is well known for sports but not really education. I’m now in grad school at Yale and the difference in the way the entire university is run and the culture is very obvious. I’m not trying to be pretentious or anything, but my husband and I had to claw our way up from nothing and I’m hoping to provide all the resources that we can for our future kids.

Thank you again for your insight!

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houle333 t1_itheyex wrote

There are towns in CT with some of the best public schools in the country. And therefore there are private schools in the state that are way better than your average private school in other states. My relatives in the south send their kids to private school and field trips are to the creationist museum. The private school my child attends in CT has their own planetarium and research level telescopes. It's a completely different world.

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mintccicecream t1_ithilpy wrote

That is also a great point! Thank you and best of luck to your child!

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mayaic t1_ithco0m wrote

I fully understand you and agree. I’ve moved out of the country now and I’ve started my son at the private school of our choice in their nursery at 9 months old. He will be there until he’s 18. My private school experience showed me that I wanted that for my son for the entirety of his education.

Good luck in your search.

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husky429 t1_ithrjen wrote

Are you talking about private boarding schools or the regular (usually religious) private elementary schools? I can't tell from your post.

You need to pay for private schools. Yes, they are often better --especially at middle and high schools. Some of the best private high schools in the entire country are in CT. They offer competition for elite colleges that publics will never compete with. They also cost 40 grand a year or more.

The private elementary schools are often not very good.

I am a public school administrator. I can give ypu info on any of the options if you'd like. Just ask

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mintccicecream t1_ithvavs wrote

I was considering the regular private schools as boarding school appears to be a little intense from the info I have gathered. Would you recommend a public elementary/middle school, possibly in Fairfield County, before switching to private for high school? I am leaning towards that pathway at the moment, but I’m sure you have more insight into the public school system as an administrator.

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husky429 t1_ithzxtf wrote

I only know a lot about high schools because I'm a hs administrator. K-5 schools the differences are generally smaller if you're comparing nicer schools. They are certainly better, but the research I've seen shows the outcomes are bigger when you look at high schools. Possibly because there are so many local religious private elementary schools? I'm not sure.

And fwiw I'm writing mostly about private boarding schools. I know a lot about them. Less about private day schools.

My wife grew up exceptionally poor and worked her way up to a top 20 law school down south for her JD and Yale for her PhD. She has 6 brothers and sisters and 4 of them are, or were, in prison. Only 1 graduated college. We met after she moved up here to CT. And she went to public school her entire life. Even public colleges until her PhD.

And because of that... I'm not a big believer in private schools in general. I want to support what made my wife and I who we are. I would never send my kids to private unless they were having issues in public schools. I think there is value in not being around a relatively homogeneous group of rich kids despite the fact that my wife and I could afford it.

I want my kids to have friends who are poor, who are something other than a token black person, or people who require special education etc. They are insular places that are far from being a slice of the real world. They're like utopias comapratively. It is possible that my personal bias effects my answer... but I tried to avoid it.

There are certainly advantages to private schools 7-12. The primary one being admissions to better colleges. Class sizes are smaller. Less school days. Nicer facilities. Less risk of violence. No or less standardized testing. SAT prep courses. They are AMAZING schools, and only a fool would ignore that.

My wife and I basically decided to balance two things... elite education vs exposure to the "real world" and opted for the latter. I don't want my kids to be elite--I want them to be well-rounded people. Some people pursue excellence and choose the elite education... nothing wrong with it. Now, our kids are doing well in school just like their mama. But no, they probably won't go to an ivy league school. We're white and don't donate any money--it wasn't gonna happen anyways.

Do you want elite education or do you want the real world? And if you choose the former, what are you going to do to ensure your kids don't end up out of touch? These are important things to consider.

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mintccicecream t1_iti1aji wrote

Thank you for this! It is definitely something my husband and I will consider before locking in a home. My husband and I also went to public school all our lives. I went on to a public university and am now at Yale for grad and my husband went on to a private university. I definitely understand where you are coming from and we do want our children to be well rounded and genuine individuals. You bring a very important perspective to the table, so thank you so much for that!

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melonphant t1_itijkjz wrote

I went to a CT private school from pre-K through 4th grade and it set me up well in reading and foreign language but I was behind in math when I transferred to public school for 5th grade. I stayed in public school through the end of high school and ended up at a top tier university for college. My parents stayed in touch with my former private school classmates’ parents and most of them turned out fine but few of them ended up at Ivy+ universities, most were at other high-ranking universities though. Post-college, we’ve all had similar, respectable outcomes in different career fields. I think all of the schools in CT are pretty strong whether they are public or private.

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mintccicecream t1_itimhml wrote

Thank you for sharing your experience! Glad to hear you are doing well!

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WhittlingDan t1_itiy4ke wrote

Private schools have the best drugs and least oversight by everyone. I also wish I had gone to only public schools I would have had a wider exposure to more types of people and I think that would have helped me to be more successful.

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Unharmful_Truths t1_ithqxzb wrote

Hello. I attended private school in Connecticut. I wouldn't make too much out of the fact that public school teachers have to have certain requirements and certificates. All my teachers were beyond competent in their subjects. Where I think the true benefit exists is in the student/teacher ratio. My school was 11 teachers for every student. That's a very, very low ratio that means your child will get a LOT of individual attention. Some other perks are that you don't have to attend school 180/Year. You get roughly twenty fewer days depending on the school. And, if you're Jewish (like I am) you get all of the Jewish holidays off from school so you don't have to miss school and make up a bunch of homework just because you went to shul on Yom Kippur. I would say another benefit is that your child will be extremely well-prepared for college as that is the goal of a preparatory institute. We also read a much higher level of literature than the public school near us. We also had Latin as a mandatory class (which I do think really helped me) and a daily assembly that featured a guest speaker, musician, artist, dancer, athlete, etc. That was very unique and extremely beneficial as an exposure to different cultures, artistic styles and prospective careers.

That said, my three best friends (and a 4th from Finland so we won't count his eduation here) all attended public school and we all met through arts. One is a professor of poetry, one is a librarian and one is a restaurateur. So I don't think anything played into their intelligence, love of art, culture, etc. aside from their personality and their families. Meaning, what goes on at home will likely have more of an effect on your child's future than the school they are in (provided you're in a good system which, since we are in a Connecticut forum, I will assume we all are).

My wife is from Europe so my daughter's first language is going to not be English. She will probably learn two languages before English becomes a major factor for her. I'm hoping that our house will provide enough of a base for her that public school will be an option because, as you might have noticed, private schools are vomit-inducingly expensive right now. So we are absolutely going to start out in our public system and see how it goes. We might move to a different town for high school just to get the "best" public high school we can for our daughter.

tl;dr: Despite attending private school myself I will be starting my daughter in public school and hoping she can remain in that system for as long as possible.

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mintccicecream t1_ithutge wrote

Thank you! That sounds like a great plan. Private schools seem to be around 40-50k+ for Connecticut, or at least the ones I was looking at, so that makes a lot of sense. I would want my children to be well educated with cultural exposure just as you are, but I’m thinking that maybe a public high school in Fairfield County is the way to go for now. Thanks again and best of luck to your daughter!

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Unharmful_Truths t1_itirmdp wrote

Fairfield is likely an incredible school system. And the food alone in Fairfield is amond the only acceptable places in Connecticut. In fact, some of the best falafel I've ever had (including the Middle East) was in a strip mall in Fairfield! The pricing is terrifying. My school is now mid-$40K/Year for day school. Very difficult to justify. But, in a place like Fairfield you'll have access to shows and art and music and NYC and all the things a child could ever need to learn about culture! You're going to nail this. Best of luck!

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mintccicecream t1_itjfg52 wrote

That sounds so amazing! Love the people on this sub. Thank you!

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Plants_Golf_Cooking t1_itigqok wrote

Private schools are indisputably better for a variety of reasons, however public schools in Connecticut (and New England in general) are not like public schools in other states. Many of CT’s public schools are on or with private schools, if you do not count things like niche programs/clubs, etc.

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76before84 t1_itm3yro wrote

I went to public. I went to amity and it was a pretty good school system. I think during my senior year, we had a kid go to each of the military academies and a fair amount got into the ivy leagues.

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mintccicecream t1_itn84as wrote

That’s so nice to hear! Thanks for sharing. Hope you’re doing well!

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Time_Yam301 t1_itjpemc wrote

I went to Fairfield Prep. I would not waste the money on private school tuition for my children, if I had them.

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