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BigFatMark t1_iyfd6px wrote

Here's how you really do it.

  1. Go to New Haven and buy a pizza from Pepe's, Modern or Sally's.

  2. Eat the whole pizza in one sitting, burning the roof of your mouth and feeling no regrets.

  3. Wander "Pizza Drunk" through the city and the outskirts, until you reach Metro North. (BONUS: No parking fee.)

  4. Think "I wonder if NYC pizza is as good as Connecticut..." then spend $35 on a roundtrip ticket to Grand Central, grab a slice from Sbarro and a Dunkin Coffee.

  5. Slip onto the train with your hood up and headphones on, not acknowledging a single human being who passes by you. (Put your ticket in the seat so you don't have to look them in the eye!)

Congratulations, you have taken the path of the CT Rat to NYC. Enjoy your stay and remember what trees look like.

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