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tempertempest t1_j13ga6v wrote

Hi, hit as many meetings as you can in the beginning. 90 meetings in 90 days helped keep me sober at the start. Make friends and build a network. Ignore anything that seems too god-centric if it irks you. AA is really about community and accountability. Northwest Connecticut has a great sober network.

Good luck! Don't hesitate to ask for help if you are struggling.


Joggingmusic t1_j1402lr wrote

Fantastic advice. Alcoholic here, but haven’t touched a drop in 2.5 years. Try to just embrace it and not worry too much about some of the goofy religious stuff in AA. Have an open and willing mind. After all, life is getting bad enough that you’re asking for help. Try not to put up any walls…I did that initially and I had to let me defenses down to make actual progress. AA isn’t perfect but it saved my life and marriage.


bliefiles t1_j13bgue wrote There are a ton of meetings in the Danbury area. Best wishes to you in your journey


BluebirdBlackdog t1_j13kdc0 wrote

This is good also see other comment to go to r/stopdrinking for lots of other help and support


flowabout t1_j13l9aa wrote

I second r/stopdrinking - this sub literally changed my life. I had so many "Day 1s" but I finally have gotten to 800+ days once I found that sub.

Good luck. You can do this!! The most important thing I noticed when I found sobriety is that absolutely everything in my life is easier once I removed alcohol from the equation. I have more energy, more laughter and more patience. And my anxiety became non existent. It's the best thing I've done for myself!


Checktheusernombre t1_j13rovt wrote

Also r/dryalcoholics. Find communities to support your sobriety. For me, believe it or not, and this doesn't work for everyone as it may be triggering, it was the positivity of the non-alcoholic beer community on Facebook that helped me a ton.

Best of luck and honestly if you are committed to it it's not that hard. The social aspect is the hardest, you just need to do you and not worry about whatever anyone else thinks or says. Unfortunately we live in a very alcohol-centered society.


kwojojojo t1_j13c3l4 wrote

Best of luck to you on your journey. I don't have any advice regarding AA but I still wanted to wish you well.

Almost 10 years sober and I still struggle at times not to pick up a drink and make a bad day go away. Some days are tougher than others but always look forward, you're stronger every day.


gargle_your_dad t1_j13j446 wrote

I went down the AA route when I quit drinking and I don't want to besmirch what obviously helps many people but for me it wasn't helpful long term. Even my wife, who was desperate for any solution, thought it was bullshit. It's much better to go to therapy or to both perhaps.

The one way AA did help was convince me I needed to quit so I wouldn't have to go to AA meetings.


andherewestand t1_j13gr85 wrote

One of my friends goes pretty much daily. I would also caution against it if you are not going to be able to take the higher power thing with the correct grain of salt that makes sense to you. In his case, he takes it to mean his own higher self and consciousness. That can take some mental gymnastics to make some of it hit home, however. If you don't want that flavor, you can try looking for other substance abuse programs near you. Google Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357. All the best to you as you tackle this transformative journey.


docrsb t1_j13i21s wrote

8pm men’s meeting in sandy hook tonight 92 church hill road


liltingly t1_j13jf9r wrote

SMART recovery is a more science based system if AAs message doesn’t resonate. There are a bunch of other options. If you have insurance, you can also do outpatient/intensive outpatient and detox as well as a kickstart.


WhittlingDan t1_j15ti6b wrote

I love SMART recovery.

There is also an atheist AA meeting in northeast CT. As far as I know the only one of its kind in CT. The steps are tweaked a bit. There are a lot of Atheist AA groups around the country and they are great. Refuge Recovery is Buddhist based and also pretty good.

If anyone wants to talk I have a lot of experience regarding this topic. I can also help anyone that wants it work through AA as an atheist and deal with diff meetings and especially people regarding pushing god. Sometimes its extra hard if you are limited to local meanings and there aren't many and/or they are not very good. Ask about rides to other meetings and people will pick you up. Meetings can be very different from group to group.


CatsNSquirrels t1_j13kzsf wrote

No advice (wish I had some), just want to commend you on your bravery! It takes real strength to ask for help. I wish you the best and you’ve got this!


mynameisnotshamus t1_j13lzv4 wrote

Huge of you to realize you may need some help. I can’t offer anything to you but encouragement and Reddit support. Here’s to a better life.


Interesting_Cheek241 t1_j13l317 wrote

If you prefer a place with No religious context i highly suggest TST. Have a buddy that loves AA at tst but is not involved in the temple beyond it. I personally love my temple they are very accepting.


Time_Yam301 t1_j13pf89 wrote

Satanic temple? wtf?

Do you have orgies? i'd be down for that.


Interesting_Cheek241 t1_j13pm00 wrote

No we have thoughtful conversations without any fairytales


Time_Yam301 t1_j13vwkt wrote

That was really just an exercise to see if the average age here was 19. "Oh look at the dumbass who doesn't shoe appropriate deference to the satanists! I am so much smarter than him, downvote to make my dick hard!"

I have thoughtful conversations with and without fairytales all the time.

Even an intelligent college student who has a superficial understanding of Nietzsche knows that fairytales are an essential part of the human experience. Did anyone believe Homer was a divine book? No.

All humans have their gods, whether they believe they believe they are real or not.


Kolzig33189 t1_j13c6zl wrote

Good for you for trying to proactively make some positive changes and I wish you the best of luck.


Ak1617 t1_j13pxec wrote

Just Google AA meetings, and show up to a bunch. All you need to do is walk in and sit down and listen. People will notice you’re new and be friendly and approach you. Take their phone numbers when they offer (they will offer). Then they’ll probably offer to text/call you to invite you to meetings or offer rides if you need. No pressure, they honestly want to help because if you make it far enough in AA, helping others becomes a big part of it.

You’ll quickly learn which meetings you like and drop the ones you don’t based on (format, day/time, group size, location, etc). Remember, the #1 rule is to absorb what speaks to you and leave what doesn’t. There will always be speakers that share things you agree with, and things you dont. You don’t need to agree with everything said in the rooms, that’s not the point. You’re all there to find the missing piece for yourselves.


eleyezeeaye4287 t1_j13pvuj wrote

Welcome! I’m almost five years sober but have been going to recovery meetings for thirteen years. to answer your questions:

  1. There are meetings every day of the week. In the beginning they recommend a 90 in 90 which is 90 meetings in 90 days so you go daily but you can go as frequently or infrequently as you like depending on your schedule. Some people even do multiple a day if they have the time.

  2. There are men’s meetings and women’s meetings but most are mixed. The AA website will indicate what type of meeting is what.

  3. I’m not in your area and go to mostly women’s meetings now for safety reasons having to do with an ex so I cannot make any recommendations but try out a few different ones and see which ones click.

Best of luck on your sobriety journey and please let me know if you have any other questions.


noonan1371 t1_j13w2q6 wrote

My last drink was March 18th 2005. My best piece of advice I can give you is this.

Quit for yourself and yourself only.

Other advice.

Get some hobbies

Make new friends that don't drink. Not saying anything negative about your current friends.

If you fall off the horse, shit happens. Start over with a new day 1 don't beat yourself up over it. This is a hard enough road as it is.

Count you days. Sounds stupid but worked for me.

Start with small goals. For me I started with can I wake up and get to breakfast with out drink.

As for meeting I have never been to one but to my understanding if you look you can fins them daily.

Best wishes


Doobie1775 t1_j15n7wr wrote

I second this, AA was an eye opener. It was the first time I was able to be honest with myself. After a few meetings I decided AA was not for me, I ended up going to a place in Stratford and have been sober since. That was 4.6 years ago (I still keep track) it was a group therapy session 3 times a week, I wanted it to so I really dove into it head first. I was tired. I wasn't a good father. Fiance or anything else for that matter. I lost who I was.

Get into therapy regardless, have a heart to heart with yourself while laying everything on the table. Absolute honesty with Yourself is key. Embrace the suck, learn to be ok with it. Work on yourself every minute of the day. Forgive yourself and try to make up for the wrongs you've done and try better tomorrow.

This is my story and not everyone is the same, but it was the best gift I've ever given to myself. The first time I loved myself but it didn't come easy, three years it took me to feel somewhat normal again but a hobby helps tremendously !!! I could go on for days rambling but I wish you the best of luck. You got this and if you do fall off the wagon jump back on. The more times you try the success rate increases. Much love and best of luck


BryanCalens2ndFamily t1_j13c4dk wrote

Are you seeing a therapist/psychiatrist? That’s extremely helpful, the meetings with AA can supplement but professional help and meds will offer more success when used in conjunction


keepitupxxx t1_j13ifzs wrote

Strong start already with this post Wish you the best


ricnyse t1_j13jwer wrote

Personally therapy may help too. They can prescribe naltrexone to get you over the hump


Redsmedsquan t1_j13i3wo wrote

Hey I used to work in addictions if you need someone to talk to about your journey I’m all ears


mustelidblues t1_j143sv8 wrote

please watch for withdrawal symptoms. a friend of mine is also trying to stop and had a seizure last week. there is no shame in needing medical detox, alcohol is a hell of a drug.

best wishes and you got this!


Pinocchio226 t1_j144dmw wrote

The separate meetings have purpose. It keeps you focused on recovery without finding yourself attracted to others on the journey. In addition admitting your powerless can get tangled in pride and it might be easier in front of other men at first.


thebatfan5194 t1_j13g7sz wrote

Good for you, wishing you the best on your journey


OhOuiChef t1_j13oon7 wrote

There’s a bunch of zoom AA groups that can help get you through days where there may not be an in person meeting in your area


nintendosbitch666 t1_j13upws wrote

My only advice is if you don't believe in God or a higher power, you probably won't get much out of the meetings. Since they really, really push on that.

Imo they're just pushing people to trade one addiction for another (like those who go from over eating to obsessively working out daily and counting every little calorie in everything, it's just trading one eating disorder for another) and it's never sat right for me

Has helped a lot of people tho so I don't wanna discourage you from taking a shot at it


IbetitsBen t1_j14bsl6 wrote

A higher power can literally be a doorknob, the term is taken very literally. I was initially scared off for that reason, i definitely didn't want to be part of a group that shoves "God" down my throat. However, ive found that anyone that mentions Jesus or the Biblical God gets spoken to about it, most meetings generally aren't cool with that. Though I will say, they do say the lords prayer at the end of some meetings, which is a bit weird. It's not mandatory though (nothing is in AA, except a desire to stop drinking/using) and i normally don't take part.


fendermb4 t1_j13muxt wrote

Proud of you! I know how you felt when you wrote this post. Take action. Get to a meeting. Someone will help you!


FireyToots t1_j13n6le wrote

I’m in Danbury, so if you ever need a person to get coffee with, I’m down.


ellemenopeaqu t1_j13rmue wrote

Just another person sending their internet support your way. Thank you for taking care of yourself friend.


Yeti_Poet t1_j13t9f2 wrote

Good for you for recognizing you need support. A lot of people want the meetings, relationships, and support of a recovery group but may not be a good fit for AA. I won't repeat the criticisms, and it works for some folks. So check it out as the best thing about AA meetings is that they are everywhere all the time.

If you find it isn't a great fit, check out Smart Recovery. They use CBT principles in a supportive group setting without some of the negative aspects of AA. It's a huge benefit for people who don't click with 12 step programs. They also have a lot of online resources and meetings.


SlantLogoEPU t1_j143bbq wrote

Pick a meeting close by and go with a friend that WILL NOT LET YOU LEAVE until its over


hwheels24 t1_j13mspc wrote

Don’t have any advice on the topic, but nice job taking this step. Best of luck to you!


Last-Instruction739 t1_j13nbwk wrote

You can even zoom into meetings these days if you are looking to get the feel of how AA works. The website has links for online meetings


thewifestah t1_j13sv7z wrote

Looks like everyone has it covered so just wanted to offer well wishes and a you got this. Half the battle is admitting you have a problem and taking the first step to get help. Good luck!


Thermite1985 t1_j13v3e6 wrote

I do NA and Refuge myself. Feel free to DM with questions


IbetitsBen t1_j141y4d wrote


So im actually in AA, and live not that far from you. There are a lot of great meetings in Monroe and Newtown, and the surrounding areas. Generally it's recommended that you do a 90 and 90 when you first get sober. 90 meetings in 90 days. Most people complain about this at first, but ive never witnessed someone who completed this not be better off for it.

There are a lot of great online meetings, but i recommend in person meetings when you are starting off. The social aspect of AA is a huge part of it. The setup of the meeting ensures that everyone has a chance to share, so that one person cannot "hold the meeting hostage". So you won't have to worry about it being a one sided conversation, that's what sponsors are for. 🙂

If you want any advice on great meetings around you, or need to talk, message me.


Odd-Flower6762 t1_j142pj3 wrote

Medical detox is definitely recommended.


TheK0ntrarian t1_j13erq0 wrote

Don't buy their higher power, surrender yourself BS. Get in with a therapist or a detox IOP. AA is borderline just another religion


IbetitsBen t1_j142dyn wrote

You earned your name..😉

I respect your opinion. But I disagree, AA is not another religion. I know Satanists and atheists that attend meetings. What religion would be cool with that? It can definitely seem a bit cult like at times, but it does work.


No_Recognition2795 t1_j14z8jz wrote

It works for 5-10% of people long term.


IbetitsBen t1_j1502g7 wrote

Those numbers are generally for people who stay sober their first time. The statistics when dealing with addiction are never good, unfortunately, and for lots of people it takes multiple attempts. By no means am i saying that AA is the only way to stay sober... Some people go to church and it helps, some people see a psychiatrist.. Etc. Im just talking about what works for me, and my personal experiences. 5-10% is still better then the alternative, in my opinion.

Edit: Spelling


No_Recognition2795 t1_j151wuz wrote

It's my opinion that those groups do more harm than good. Gives people false hope. Also, don't think it's healthy to be listening to others tell their war stories. If I'm trying to stop drinking or doing drugs, I don't need to hear the same stories I've experienced. I already understand the consequences. Those groups like to focus on the past instead of helping you build a future. If you're cool with going to meetings for the rest of your life, then more power to you, l personally don't want to be dependent on anything external from myself that isn't necessary.


IbetitsBen t1_j15ahc8 wrote

I respect your opinion. However, in my experience war stories are generally used as a way to qualify, and are typically reserved between a sponsor and sponsee. It's typically frowned upon to JUST focus on war stories in meetings. Generally the focus is on "What happened, and what its like now". I've never attended an AA meeting that just focuses on the past. Though all meetings are different.

I don't think it's false hope. People are speaking from their own experiences, and their own sobriety is proof to back it up. Sobriety is definitely possible. It can be tough at times, but again, its possible. I personally am cool with going to meetings for the rest of my life if it means that I have a chance at staying sober. An hour a day a few times a week is a small price to pay, in my opinion.

AA isn't perfect, because people are not perfect. I've seen many meetings derailed because of human drama. However, ive seen some legit miracles in my time. The transformations people have made are truly inspiring. For me that's enough. Be well.


No_Recognition2795 t1_j15fw92 wrote

If it keeps you sober, then I'm happy for you. I was just pointing out that meetings can be a detriment to some people. I always see people automatically recommend AA/NA when someone is looking to get sober, and from experience, that's not always the best option. I also will admit that I don't know what the better option would be because it's a deeply personal journey. Whatever works for the individual is what's best. I was just offering a different perspective.


IbetitsBen t1_j15x1ax wrote

Thank you, I respect your opinion and take on things. I agree with you that there are other options that may work for people. It's good to have a well rounded approach to something as monumental as getting sober. I appreciate your perspective, and hope the OP does what's best for them. Have a good night


docrsb t1_j13hnuc wrote

google aa meetings ct also there is a hotline you can call recommended to go to a meeting every day i the beginning look for “newcomers” meeting there is a great one in westport saturday am and monday night good idea inthe beginning for men to men’s meeting and women to women’s meeting

there is a big men’s meeting tonight in Trumbull also


SnooStrawberries570 t1_j13jh9d wrote

Silver Hill is great if you feel you need to get away for help right in New Canaan. Go daily maybe even twice a day if you’re up for it. Try different meeting and find the one that fits your needs. Talk to people when you you feel comfortable. You might even find a sponser that will show you the ropes and maybe introduce you to other people. It’s free take advantage of AA! Usually there’s coffee provided too!


Humbabwe t1_j13mayl wrote

Check out if you want an even more comprehensive support system.

This is a great start that you’re able to admit you need to do something and in my experience that’s the biggest indicator for success. Keep it up, you can do it!


pauldeedon t1_j13nnac wrote

Most meetings are open to everyone men and women. There’s different meetings everyday and lots of variety, you will definitely find ones you like if you look around and try some. I forget what it is but there’s a website that will give you all the meetings and times in any area. If you go to a meeting and say what you just said you will get more support than you know what to do with. You’re in newtown, try the sober center in Danbury if that still exists and there used to be a good meeting on deer hill. Dont go to the west conn young peoples group until you have yourself together a bit. FYI: have been out of the area for a long time


Clourog t1_j13rjz2 wrote

There are meetings all day every day. Just walk in and listen the first couple times, you do not need to share if you don't want to or you can if you want. Good luck


draftcrunk t1_j13vce8 wrote

You can also go to most NA meetings if you’re open to it. They are generally pretty open and accepting and in my experience can offer a more diverse crowd than AA meetings.

Another one I highly recommend is Refuge Recovery. There are not a ton of meetings but if you can find one I prefer them. YMMV. 12 Step claims to be non-denominational, and I guess technically it is, but you will run into a lot of god with a capital G talk that can rub some people the wrong way. Refuge Recovery is very similar to 12 Step groups but it is based on the Four Noble Truths and Eightfold Path from Buddhist philosophy. If that sounds like it might be up your alley, their book is excellent.


jules13131382 t1_j13w6fy wrote

Connecticut’s actually really good with this. There are tons of AA meetings all over the place. There’s some great ones in West Hartford, Glastonbury etc…no matter where you are you’ll be able to find a meeting.


OkRegular167 t1_j13wqau wrote

Many will be on Zoom too. I attended a Zoom AA meeting once. I think it’s best to go in person but participating virtually for your first couple might be more comfortable for easing yourself in. You can get an idea as to what to expect but it’s a little lower pressure. Best of luck to you.


K_Regs_46230 t1_j13xqea wrote

There are really good meetings at The Fellowship Center in Danbury (15 Great Pasture Rd). It's right on the Danbury/Bethel line. You should be able to find the times & days on the list of meetings at Show up to one or two there, and then you'll be able to find out about more stuff they have going on. It's the best place/community around this area that I found when I was going to meetings. They're welcoming, lots of people offered their numbers for support, and there are people of all ages. Also, try the ones in the evening at the Congregational Church in Brookfield. Those have always been fairly large with a good mix of people. And, I don't know your age, but the "Do it Sober Young People's Group" Sunday nights at 17 Cottage St is huge and always really good. Also, when you're looking at the list of meetings on the AA website (or app), look for beginners groups. I've only been to a couple meetings in Newtown, and unfortunately, each one only had about 5-10 people, and mostly old-timers. There's nothing wrong with that, but let's just say, I never went back to any in Newtown (I'm sure there are better ones I never attended). Let me know if you have any questions. It's, unfortunately, trial and error to find groups/meetings you like, but those places I mentioned should be a great start.


K_Regs_46230 t1_j13yp0e wrote

I said, but might be better. And if you go to your app store and search Alcoholics Anonymous, you can download an AA meeting guide. If you think you might need more professional help to quit, MCCA in Danbury has a week long detox, as well as a 30 day rehab, and other counseling options as well. Good luck in your journey!


bessa100 t1_j13ydt1 wrote

You admitted it’s an issue. That’s the hardest part. I would definitely recommend private therapy. It helped me a lot. It’s not easy, but it helps you come to terms with the issues that drive you to self medicate. Meetings are helpful even if you’re not 100% onboard with a higher power. I’ve found that even if a group wasn’t exactly my style, if I listened there would always be a positive take away. Best of luck in your journey!! Your future self will thank you!


FlightRisk5 t1_j141drc wrote

I just came here to give you props for posting on a public forum to admit you have a problem and seek help. Good luck and keep moving forward to better yourself.


bigtuna732 t1_j141ezu wrote

Good luck …Hit a lot of meetings find a sponsor that’s been sober for a while take on a coffee job at a meeting or two that way your committed to going …. You got this !!!


Nosmurfz t1_j144qyz wrote

Just keep going to meetings if you don’t like one try another. They all have a different flavor although they are pushing the same message. There are a lot of online meetings too. There is an online meeting at high watch, which is in Kent Connecticut. That’s a good one because it’s big and you don’t feel awkward. If you’re not ready to share also, they have very good sobriety.


Catapelta t1_j1453lp wrote

Meeting guide app shows you all the meetings near you and what time they’re at - lots of meetings a day.


MyFianceMadeMeJoin t1_j149xh0 wrote

Meetings aren’t a monolith; they’re all constructed of the people that make them up. While they all share the common goal of helping people quit you’ll find some groups you will or won’t mesh well with. If you find you love that’s great, but keep exploring and find other perspectives too. If you find one you hate, don’t give up and try a different meeting. Best of luck to you and consider asking your doctor about disulfiram, acamprosate, or naltrexone. Medication for alcohol use disorder can and does work when used correctly.


MV203 t1_j14ekue wrote

If you can get down to Fairfield/Westport areas there’s some great meetings at St. Luke’s Stables in Westport and Club 12 (St. Emerys) in Fairfield/Blackrock


MV203 t1_j14eo90 wrote

Both men/women and also “young peoples”meetings.


HighJeanette t1_j14idc7 wrote

I had to try a couple of different meetings until I found the one I felt the most comfortable with.


tjibbs11 t1_j14mm4m wrote

Good on you for changing for the better. If you ever want to go to a virtual meeting, checkout they have meetings every day.


blakeusa25 t1_j14pwbs wrote

My son has been sober for 5 years now.
Goes to a meeting every day.
It saved him.


Yourbubblestink t1_j14sh60 wrote

You can go every day or every hour if you like. Each meeting is different, most folks go ti a few different ones and think of one of them as their home group. In early recovery looking for ‘open’ meetings (anyone can attend) and Discussion groups (more stories less focus on the 12 step Big book).

Maybe find a sponsor, don’t worry about judgment - everyone there is past that already.

Don’t get stuck on the higher power concept if you are not spiritual. Think of it as the thing that is driving you to find sobriety.


Alert-Extreme1139 t1_j14ulf0 wrote

Fourteen years here. I'd advise to not focus on one, specific meeting, but instead hit a bunch of different ones. Some you'll like, others not so much. And some may surprise you. The flexibility and diversity AA provides is probably its greatest strength. The sense of "we're all in this together" is stronger the more groups you're exposed to.

All the best to you on your journey!


ATG915 t1_j14wq9h wrote

They have them everyday of the week, multiple times a day at the same locations usually. will show you every meeting near you. I can’t answer anything about mixed gender meetings. I’ve been sober for almost 2 years but haven’t actually been to any AA meetings, only looked into it when I first got out of rehab


eastst328 t1_j14wsph wrote

There is one everywhere, as far as the eye can see. Right next door.


tulips49 t1_j15d2xi wrote

My sister is in recovery (almost a year!) and the one good point of the pandemic is many meetings are now online, too. So, you could join any virtual meeting (even in another city/state) based on your schedule. Just Google the day/time and you’d be welcome in any space regardless of the location! Good luck!


WhittlingDan t1_j15vk8v wrote

Besides AA there are also other group options such as my favorite, SMART Recovery as well as Refugee Recovery for examples. AA can be great especially in connecting you with others wanting the same thing but AA alone won't be enough. Get into counseling as well. Some people are not religious and some are atheists for them, the latter especially, 12 step groups can be difficult. A lot of groups tend to push the god aspect but worse is individual people that WILK try to persuade you then often berate you and tell you how you can't get sober. Ignore them and keep trying new meetings until you find good ones. There are atheist friendly meetings and even some (rare in CT) atheist meetings (with slightly modified steps. You do not need a god or higher power to get sober but if you believe in that its probably not going to harm you in anyway and if that's what you need to stay sober then do it.

I have a long history regarding this topic and if anyone wants to talk or needs advice/direction to get help, to get services, to get into rehab, whatever, ask and I will help how I can.

if you are struggling with AA or any 12 step group because of the spirituality/god part you don't have to. There are ways to make it work and even atheist meetings. There are also other options, options without gods or the supernatural. I'm an Atheist that did a lot with AA. If anyone needs help/guidance I will do what I can if you ask.


WhittlingDan t1_j15w5ht wrote

There are Atheist AA meetings for anyone that needs help but does not believe in gods or the supernatural. There are also excellent alternatives, one such alternative and my favorite is SMART Recovery. It is secular and evidence based. I'm (an atheist) in recovery and if anyone needs help or advice, ask me. Even if your a believer and I'm not it doesn't matter, I will help you.


iwanttobehappy2022 t1_j15wov3 wrote

There are barely any smart meetings. There are AA meetings everyday multiple times a day everywhere


RavenCT t1_j169qda wrote

If you need something less religion based try this: There are AA meetings that avoid the "Higher Power" being religion.
But as an Atheist myself who had many atheist clients - I hated to send them to AA - they never felt it was their spot.


MaineBoston t1_j13eylh wrote

There are usually multiple meeting everyday.


mlassoff t1_j13yvtd wrote

All methods of recovery have a 10-15% long term recovery rate. AA is a faith based option that works as often as anything else.

What AA does do is provides a round the clock support system that’s invaluable to many addicts.

It’s also free.

Not sure what your anti-AA crusade is about, but someone recovering from addiction often tries and uses multiple recovery programs and methods.


break_card t1_j14fyx2 wrote

Not an answer to your post but damn does it brighten my day to see posts of people taking action to improve themselves. Good for you - go kick some ass!


Whut4 t1_j14iaro wrote

You can go to as many as you want and have time for. There are mixed groups. Congratulations on making this decision!! You will not regret it!


AechBee t1_j14ikkf wrote

Wishing you fortitude, perseverance and hope - never give up on yourself! Good job on taking this first step and as many others have said, ask for help when you need it. And if you can’t decide whether or not a moment is “enough” to ask for help - reach out. You have a huge community of strangers who care and are rooting for your success.


musicman0766 t1_j14kjah wrote

No real experience here to give out advice, but best wishes on your recovery. Keep your head up and remember that no one is perfect and tomorrow is another day to win. Stay strong.


sicknaban8 t1_j14m6og wrote

Best of luck. I've heard from many going through the doors helped them immensely. Best to embrace the high power unless you're anti religious I heard that made it all the much better. I know there's traditional adult meetings and younger folks meetings like 20s/30s versus adult kind where it's an older crowd. Try them both find your groove. My friend is 3.5 years sober and he attributes it to AA and drinking the Kool aid. Good luck


Impreza4ever t1_j14ouvh wrote

Just go! Go and commit your time. I was so scared to go when I first got into recovery but honestly the best way to get into it is to just want it and do it!


Annual_Narwhal784 t1_j15ehgt wrote

I can’t give you advice about AA other than, star going and find some group you like. The fact that you need help and want help is good. Do not give up. Try different things to keep you thinking about yourself and positive changes. It can be very hard but you can quit drinking. I know bc I did it 30 plus years ago. No drugs no alcohol that whole time. It was rough at first bc I had to change my whole routine. But day by day week by week it turned wonderful. Please get the help you want and need and don’t give up.


Shtoinkity_shtoink t1_j15jmt0 wrote

If you have a serious problem, I’d see if your insurance will cover an IOP rehab/program… just tell them you’re at days sober (even if that’s a lie) cuz otherwise they will admit you and make you do an inpatient program…

If AA is the route. Try to find one that is 3 times a week and just start going. You don’t have to say anything. Just show up. And keep going. Someone will eventually talk to you and just keep going.

#One day at a time


triplefastaction t1_j16a3os wrote

If you have the time it's best to start in detox because they give you the starting blocks for AA. I'd also recommend rushfords 30 day program.


ChacarronandCheese t1_j16ioga wrote

The reframe app is really great! Please check it out!


Few-Information7570 t1_j16tyuj wrote

Go every day. Go to different towns. Talk.

You are making the best decision of your life.


No-Hope-9427 t1_j175zyj wrote

Go to Highwatch in Kent if you have good insurance, if not definitely find a meeting close to home, find a sponsor and build up a group of ppl who want to get clean and or see you get clean


No-Hope-9427 t1_j1764ap wrote

Pink Cloud is an app you can use to find meetings


No-Hope-9427 t1_j176jvy wrote

Listening to other people who have been sober longer than you will help. Don’t be afraid to reach out either. Go to meetings as much as possible you will make it, be vulnerable too the only way you will overcome addiction is if you overcome your trauma.


SkyloBenKenobi t1_j179gv7 wrote

Absolutely go to an AA meeting. Raise your hand. Introduce yourself, say you’re new and you need help. People will surely help and guide you. I’m in the Litchfield area, I have been in AA a long time and I still go to 5 a week. I love what it has done for my life and pray you find your way soon!


lilmegglez t1_j17s0ls wrote

I see your ct... if ur close to the boarder to westerly, at the westerly senior center there's a meeting at 730 a.m everyday. It's a mixed group and a daily reflections meeting.


Kickna11 t1_j17v5b8 wrote

good for you, this program is a total journey. My best suggestion is to seek out big book meetings and find a step guide / sponsor to take you through the steps out of the big book, the way the first 100 people did. This will guarantee you will have the best shot of having solid sobriety, and then you’ll have something to give back to people that need it, once you get through the steps.

IMO anything else is half assed. The true program tends to get watered down with meetings where people are sharing about their day, or using meetings as therapy. If you go through all 12 steps you’re promised a new way of thinking and a new life. Best of luck!


Certain-Pin-9506 t1_j188h38 wrote

I would recommend 90 meetings in 90 days if you can. Definitely mix it up and try different meetings and types of meetings to see what fits you best. If you look on you can find plenty that won’t be far from you, they are everywhere. It’s a great community to be a part of. When a meeting begins the chairperson will ask if anyone is new to the program or that meeting,, so be sure to get your hand up. Sorry for the compressed message I am getting ready for work lol. Feel free to message me if you want to chat


No_Recognition2795 t1_j14y1qe wrote

What do you expect to get out of these meetings? I know personally that AA/NA never helped me. You sit around and listen to people tell stories about how they destroyed their lives and there's nothing of value being said because you already understand the experience. It's more of a group to vent to but if you're looking for actual help you're not going to find it there imo. I know the struggle and the only thing that worked for me was realizing that I'm the only one that can change my behavior, there's nothing outside myself that is going to make a lasting impact. I've been through it all AA/NA, IOP, RP, residential treatment and none of it helped. It wasn't until I really wanted to stop that I was able to. Been off the heroin for over 5 years and stopped drinking 3 years ago. You can do it you just need to believe you can.


SkyloBenKenobi t1_j1794so wrote

It’s because you never put in the work. And it shows. Don’t spoil someone else’s chance to recover because you didn’t do anything for yourself. It’s a spiritual program of action, which I can tell you are not about being spiritual or doing any action. Commenting this on a post of someone asking for help. Shame on you. If you knew anything about real alcoholics, you can’t stop on your own. If you can you’re not a real alcoholic or drug addict. Just a moderate to heavy drinker.


No_Recognition2795 t1_j189mbq wrote

YOU weren't able to stop on your own. I'm not going to sit here and argue over who had the "real" addiction that's just ignorant. It's so funny to me how the little cult members always come out of the woodwork to defend their little cult.


RoseyPeak t1_j189ywk wrote



RoseyPeak t1_j18a2sw wrote

It's even more fucked up of them to say who has it worse and not. Like wtf. If you're an alcoholic you're an alcoholic. There's no moderate if you know you're drinking too much. That person is fucked up to say that


Zealousideal_Eagle25 t1_j16bash wrote

When you Start crying in the car like everybody else realized that this is life and no one will change you for s*** you can do this period


the-crotch t1_j13r1je wrote

12 step programs are ineffective, you'd be better off finding a licensed therapist that specializes in substance abuse

However you go about it though, I wish you the best of luck


the-crotch t1_j13w148 wrote

I can post links to studies too! I shouldn't need to, though, AA didn't even work for the guy who started it

“Out of 50 treatment methods ranked by the strength of scientific evidence, AA comes in 38th"

10% success rate long term

"Mixed results"

"12-step recovery simply doesn't work"


psyco-the-rapist t1_j140zdu wrote

Been to a lot of meetings. I've seen and known a good amount of therapists for addictions. All the therapists encouraged me to go to meetings as well. My AA sponsor always encouraged therapy. Wishing you well.


the-crotch t1_j14142c wrote

If it works for you it's the best solution for you


SkyloBenKenobi t1_j178ssd wrote

What are you talking about? Bill Wilson stayed sober until the day he died. You have no room talking about anything you don’t know shit about. You have opinions. Fine but don’t go spouting fallacious absurdities that have no basis in fact and might hurt someone’s life.


the-crotch t1_j18g3sy wrote

> What are you talking about? Bill Wilson stayed sober until the day he died.

Only because his nurse refused to give him a shot

> You have no room talking about anything you don’t know shit about.

Nearly every study done on the subject has concluded that AA is near the bottom of the list for efficacy.

> You have opinions.

I have peer reviewed facts. You have personal anecdotal evidence.

> don’t go spouting fallacious absurdities that have no basis in fact and might hurt someone’s life.

This is what happens when you turn recovery into a religion...


SkyloBenKenobi t1_j178dnn wrote

Don’t go around spitting this obviously ridiculous rhetoric. AA is the most effective solution by so far it’s incomparable. I’m a proud member and I know a lot of people who’s lives are much better because of it. Ask my daughter and my family if 12 steps don’t work.


the-crotch t1_j18gesp wrote

> Don’t go around spitting this obviously ridiculous rhetoric.

I'm not. I'm spouting the results of numerous scientific studies into the subject. Here's two of them.

> AA is the most effective solution by so far it’s incomparable.

Citation needed.

> I’m a proud member and I know a lot of people who’s lives are much better because of it.

Personal anecdotes aren't evidence. I'm happy it worked for you. The science says it works for a very small minority (according to one of the studies I linked, as low as 10%)