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bill_gannon t1_jalz3ty wrote

The world would be a better place if we all operated on a little more sympathy.


cherrymasterlou OP t1_jamlt4x wrote

Absolutely. A little more sympathy goes a long way, but not when when it comes at the cost of your own growth.


ZootOfCastleAnthrax t1_japamhx wrote

Sympathy for whom? I'm confused.


JDBCool t1_japiwy2 wrote

Sympathy as in "being a yes man"/"be the team player mindset" that these corps/HR "motivators" push.

That whole mentality only works in small teams that don't have big budgets.

It's more of the "Yes man" mindset if you are financially sound. As you can quit without worry on bills


corpjuk t1_jamhjuw wrote

But these old memories will be times with my daughter


sum_dude44 t1_jamsw4g wrote

this is nonsense blather…nostalgia can be soothing & can connect people..even if it was harmful, this is word salad


sgr28 t1_jan2dm5 wrote

Tell that to me whose parents held on to a house way longer than they could comfortably afford to because "memories" and basically have to sell it now after losing thousands of extra dollars in maintenance and property taxes that they don't have when they would've been far better off financially selling it 5+ years ago


comicguy13 t1_jamli7v wrote

What is nostalgia is the place you go to escape your current toxic muddy place?


Obiwancuntnobi t1_jamo6s2 wrote

What about widows and parent who’ve lost a child.

Save your unrealistic cookie cutter happiness recipes


sgr28 t1_jan2xoa wrote

Not going to judge anymore for how they live their life but I can tell you that my Dad became a widower in his mid 20s and made a personal decision in recent years to really focus on nostalgia and I can definitely tell you that decision has had real tangible negative consequences for him. I don't judge him for doing it, but I can testify that overloading on nostalgia is not without cost.


Obiwancuntnobi t1_jan47ka wrote

I can guarantee you it’s not a decision. As a widower I can say it’s not possible to not think of what you’ve lost. It’s unavoidable. The tide of grief comes in even after years of being out. You cannot ru away from it in any healthy way. You cannot control it.


stop_lying_good_god t1_jamau2g wrote


Process your old memories by just typing them up.

Then, you will essentially have discarded them into a safe place.

Worked for me.


aarbear13 t1_jamyrpe wrote

"in my life, I have seen people walk into the sea. Just to find memories plagued by constant misery"

Favorite line from Cage the Elephant


fantasyfootball1234 t1_jan9hu1 wrote

“It’s safe to say that.. I don’t think you understand. There’s nowhere left to turn, walls keep breaking. Time is like a leaf in the wind, either it’s time well spent or it’s time I’ve wasted… don’t waste it.”


Chapped_Morality t1_jan4gxi wrote

Thanks for this clarity...much needed as I cut off a 2 decade plus friendship that was fading away thanks to nostalgia being the centerpiece of that person's thoughts and memory bank.


CrookedCreek13 t1_janz1id wrote

“Your growth has no room to operate on sympathy.”

Wtf does that mean?


vode123 t1_jao5g90 wrote

A lot of people live in memories and nostalgia makes them feel good, they fail to see the negatives to nostalgia, that is, never moving forward with life.


k-i-ll t1_jaopn36 wrote

This makes absolutely perfect sense if you are an alcoholic addict who is constantly trying to relive past memories of how good it “used to be”.


MuanaDoYouWana t1_japcsr6 wrote


Miss Miley Represents beautiful/toxic nostalgia, the wrecking ball is the inevitable power and destruction that comes with it. (And what it does to me)


Accomplished-Ad4334 t1_jan14mr wrote

You can have compassion towards the old times. That’s how I found healing. Loving someone through all the different versions of themselves, even the ones that hurt me, because I know they can do better and they weren’t vibrating at their highest frequency at the time because of the situations that had unfolded. It’s best to let go of expectations, . And recognize that they can’t always meet you where you need them to, but don’t have expectations that they will. Just love purely and freely.


mrgoldnugget t1_jaoiww4 wrote

I read this a few times, at first I thought nostalgia was the name of a company.


StopStaringMe t1_japicpt wrote

I've got nothing else to keep me going than a peaceful past. Its just infinite darkness.


Icecain123 t1_japln9u wrote

It's quite difficult though when everyday is worse than the next and the memories of good times with someone special is the only real joy you feel but these memories are not reality therefore depression sets in