heal myself gradually from trauma and the unhealthy behaviors I had learned from my family, start to eat healthier and being outside. take my dog on more walks, remind myself of boundaries and how to love myself.

i also want to finish my trilogy, and a bunch of other book/story ideas that have been in my brain for years. they're always there, and I know I cannot die without making them known. even if they arent famous or popular - they tell a story I so desperately wish to share, a reminder that mental illness and trauma can't fully stop you, and every time my brain starts thinking of my own demise I remember I will not stop until I can do this thing that has meant so much to me for so many goddamn years