I understand. Before I posted this I also thought about this, but I changed my mind and here is why. Even if you had it better when you were younger, you have more experience than ever. You will always have the most experience in the present moment. You will probably say well, it doesn't matter how much experience I have now since I already made the wrong decision. But you will not do it again and you are more prepared and you can teach others about it.

I also made wrong decisions in the past but what can I do about it? Nothing. I need to accept them as they are and be more careful next time.

You are saying other people made the right decision back then and you didn't and now you suffer for it. This is life. But what can you do about it? There are 2 ways. First, you stay where you are or second you try to get out. And I can already tell you some positive things based on what you said:

• Suffering builds character, so you became stronger than your old self
• Like I said, you have more experience and with that you can make better decisions because you know how it's like to pick the wrong one and you will be more mindful
• you will learn more about you through this period than you would from success

It's hard to think positive whenever but you need to make an effort. And about being grateful. You should be grateful for the little things. If you want to have what they have, think of the present situation as just a period, it will pass. But you need to work towards what you want.