Be messy and fast with new goals [Discussion]

Submitted by TreatThompson t3_xx90cs in GetMotivated

We usually pair new goals with a source of inspiration from someone we admire.

We want to start a YouTube channel and do it like our favourite creator. Or we want to lose weight and do it like our favourite influencer.

But that mindset can make it harder for us.

With new goals, your top priority should be starting.

When you compare the beginning of your journey to an expert at their peak you trap yourself. Seeing their tools, resources, and skills will make you feel like you don’t have what you need. But what's optimal for them isn’t required for you to get started. Their setup is optimized for their level of success.

The best thing to do is give yourself the bare minimum necessary to start. Understand what is needed versus what is optimal.

Optimal vs. Necessary

It’s easy to become obsessed with what’s optimal. It’s a technique our brains use to keep us in our comfort zone. It convinces us we need new skills, gear, connections, etc. before we can take our first step towards the goal. That way we stay idle and won’t have to do any hard work.

>If you are the kind of person who is waiting for the ‘right’ thing to happen, you might wait for a long time. It’s like waiting for all the traffic lights to be green for five miles before starting the trip.—Robert Kiyosaki

You don’t need new shoes to start running.

You don’t need a great logo to start a business.

You don’t need a new pan to start eating healthy.

You don’t need a perfect name to start a YouTube channel.

You don’t need a new backpack to start hiking.

You don’t need a nice website to start blogging.

You don’t need a great tablet to start animation.

You get the point. You don’t need anything more than what makes it physically possible to start.

You should start quick and messy, then correct course along the way.

Keep in mind that you can improve something bad, but you can't improve something that doesn't exist.

A perfect plan will never take you anywhere on its own.

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This post was from my newsletter

I share ideas from great thinkers so we can stand on the shoulders of giants, instead of figuring life out alone

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Comments

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TreatThompson OP t1_iraoev3 wrote

James Clear has a great quote that aligns with this:

“If you're not working hard, ideas don’t matter. The best idea is worthless without execution. If you're already working hard, ideas are crucial. Most effort is wasted on mediocre ideas.”

If you’re not in motion and taking action then your ideas are irrelevant. Ideas only have value when they are brought to real life.

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CordesRed t1_irb73az wrote

I love this!

I've been trying to change the way I eat for a long time.

I'll get myself all worked up and ready. I'll get started but if I mess up and eat something I shouldn't I've had the tendency to get really discouraged and throw the whole plan away.

Recently I've started trying again but this time I've done a few things differently.

I'm giving myself room to fail. I'm not so hard on myself. Maybe I shouldn't have given in and had that cookie but it doesn't mean the whole thing is a fail. I can forgive myself and keep going.

I'm also focusing on a lifestyle change. Instead of calling it a diet, I'm calling it nutritional therapy and instead of telling myself I'm doing it to lose weight, I'm doing it to help my stomach feel better.

Framing it this way has helped my mind adjust to the idea that this is a permanent change and not just a temporary diet I'm doing to lose weight. It just feels different this time.

It's been about a month so far and it's been going really well. I'm starting to notice myself being thirsty for water not soda and hungry for fruits and veggies instead of candy and chips.

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TreatThompson OP t1_irbfydd wrote

I relate to this more than you know!!

I used to have such a bad habit of making everything I do all or nothing. I never made breathing room, or room for grey area.

So happy to see the mindset change is going great for you!

Keep it up 🙌😤🥳

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Cooky1993 t1_ircrpee wrote

My biggest successes in eating better and losing weight have come when I just focused on making one small change at a time.

Rather than a big grand plan, I just go with 1 change at a time (more if I can manage it, but you must do that in the knowledge that not all those changes will stick at the first time of asking)

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Charming_Love2522 t1_ircsvt7 wrote

You just motivated me to make a small change: quit drinking soda.

I work at a gas station and we get free soda all day long if we like. I typically have a cup or two everyday I work.

I quit it for a bit(3-4 weeks), then craved it when someone brought in pizza and now I'm back to drinking it every damn day. It's unhealthy AF.

I'm not going to go on a whole weight loss journey just yet, but I can start with cutting out soda.

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Cooky1993 t1_irctqaw wrote

The other trick is to find a substitute for when you want that soda.

I don't know a huge amount about your sugar free soda options in the US, but in the UK there's sugar free Fanta and sugar free Lucosade Pink Lemonade and they taste better than the sugared versions to me. So when I need a "cheat" from not drinking soda I go for one of those.

Finally, you didn't fail if you do have a sugary soda, you succeeded for 3-4 weeks. It's a journey, but those small changes add up. I lost 2 stone in the last 2 months from not drinking soda and making a few healthier choices for meals (usually that means having regular meals rather than snacking for me). These changes won't happen overnight, and equally one slip won't throw you all the way back. Focus on the successes, and believe that you deserve them for your hard work!

You've got this my friend!

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Charming_Love2522 t1_ircv3a2 wrote

Thank you! I actually had a ton of those flavors you add to water that I bought to work when I wanted to stop, I'll go back to using those. And I just did like 10 minutes of Journaling snd decided: I'm not going to commit to QUIT drinking it all together. That seems to much of a commitment right now, what I'll do is not drink soda at work. I don't drink much soda outside of work, maybe one or two times a week. I don't want to completely limit myself because I do freaking love my Diet Pepsi.

I know myself well enough to know I'll have a diet pepsi at some point at a resturant, and be like "ahh well this goal is now forever ruined and I'll just go back to drinking soda."

Little steps.

Also thanks, I did succeed for a few weeks and that definitely gives me a better mindset to try again. Rather than thinking "oh I already failed once, I'll probably fail again," it's "oh! I already succeeded once and can do this again!" I appreciate you pointing that out and helping me change my mindset

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connor24_22 t1_ircsvsp wrote

Congratulations on having a great month. I’ve been through what you’re going through and can happily say my lifestyle has actually changed, several years later, which is the key to anything lasting.

It sounds like you have the perfect formula for self-success and already have the right viewpoint. Good luck with your progress!

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klondijk t1_irc5udr wrote

You actually might need new shoes to start running, depending on the condition of the shoes you have. It's super easy to get injured with the wrong running shoes, which is definitely not going to keep you motivated

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YouAreMarvellous t1_irdt258 wrote

But you dont need to look at "Top 10 Running Shoes of 2022"

Bought mine for 25 bucks and they are perfect

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Bitter-Ad8728 t1_ircq2ih wrote

Agreed, the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the next best time is now.

  • Chinese proverb.
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koit222 t1_irc8rze wrote

Action brings clarity. Fail fast.

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TreatThompson OP t1_irc8xfr wrote

I love the concept of failing fast, thanks for adding that

Definitely needs to be more widely understood

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PersonalCommunism t1_ircesxu wrote

Not a perfect quote but Voltaire said something akin to, "Don't let perfect be the enemy of good."

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TreatThompson OP t1_ird7roz wrote

Suchhhhh a good quote

I’d be happy with great, good, okay, or decent outcomes. All of those are better than nothing. But the obsession with perfect stops you from getting any of those.

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PTBOLad t1_ircpyfl wrote

I’m actually taking a bartending course in the hopes of getting a better job. I’ve heard that you make pretty good tips as well?

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ddrcrono t1_ircv7y4 wrote

Every neat thing I've done more or less started on a whim.

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TreatThompson OP t1_ircyqbc wrote

I feel that—same with me!

I never over planned or analyzed it, just dipped my toe in and kept going

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dashdevil85 t1_irb9tki wrote

Can’t register for your newsletter: „typeerror: load failed“

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neoliberalhack t1_ird3kbe wrote

This is glorious. It’s how I trapped myself into never doing anything, new goal or otherwise. We have to start small, we have to trip multiple times before we can walk correctly. Much needed and appreciated advice.

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YouAreMarvellous t1_irdt655 wrote

Talked about this with a friend of mine: We both agreed that we finished more stuff when we were younger, even if it was ugly. It was finished and worked.

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[deleted] t1_irmciie wrote

Fail but fail safely. Don't be like me and rush into physical activities without someone to guide you like a trainer.

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HealthyTough9972 t1_irbhky8 wrote

Why can't we just live ? Always achieve this and that.

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ProtopetPhantom t1_irbscg5 wrote

It’s part of living, otherwise you’re just surviving.

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TreatThompson OP t1_irc6rcz wrote

I’m right there with you

Achieving/reaching for things/having a purpose/having meaning is the magic of life for me

If I was just wandering around not trying to pursue anything I’d be more anxious

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ProtopetPhantom t1_irc8zfs wrote

Yep I’ve noticed in my life when I don’t have goals I tend to just plateau. Obviously you want to avoid burnout but people should always challenge themselves and try to be a better person than they were the day before.

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shockingdevelopment t1_ird6ndj wrote

I find that if you have a goal, you might not reach it. But with no ambition in life, you are never disappointed. I've followed this rule for nearly 40 years, and am in constant mental and physical agony!

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HealthyTough9972 t1_irbyfie wrote

I get that. But this overachievement and over productive society is what leads so many people to mental health problems. How many people have depression because their parents put a lot of pressure in how much money they should be making or how many degrees they should have. Overall, it is everyone trying to be more and having more than everyone. If someone just want to enjoy being alive and priorities their freedom/time instead of work/studies they are labelled as "lazy" or incompetent.

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ProtopetPhantom t1_irc1y2h wrote

We’re not talking about that. Make your own goals. Have you’re own aspirations. That’s a whole new topic to what you’re referring to.

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