hairysnowmonkey t1_it7dtok wrote on October 21, 2022 at 1:55 PM

In my experience failure is bought on by one's self to the exact same degree which any success is. It's all on our selves. All of it.

ChessieJackson t1_it83pvg wrote on October 21, 2022 at 4:50 PM

If you think you totally control your destiny you're a fool.

hairysnowmonkey t1_it88ius wrote on October 21, 2022 at 5:22 PM

I didn't claim that. But if you look for anyone or anything other than yourself to attribute your personal success or failure in life, you're not only an irresponsible failure on that basis alone but a simplistic child looking for an existential scapegoat. All my failures have been on me. Not society nor my parents. All my successes have been me taking whatever assets I have, and beyond that starting point using my own effort applied to what opportunities come. Seems to me this describes most people, regardless of status. You take what you have and try to do something with it. You might succeed or fail. Foolishness and destiny controlling don't play into it.

ChessieJackson t1_it89pdh wrote on October 21, 2022 at 5:30 PM

Apparently you've never been anywhere where people gun for you. Freeze you out for no reason....or you're the one doing it.

hairysnowmonkey t1_it8aofc wrote on October 21, 2022 at 5:36 PM

No why would you or I be the one doing it? Especially as I apparently don't believe it exists? I've been in many jobs and schools and teams. Worked with and for many people in many fields. In what high stakes fast paced competitive world do you live where people freeze you and gun for you? Or you do that to others? And do you think at the end of their lives people look back and think about their success and failure, they think small petty thoughts about being frozen out of that job or gunned for on that team? Again this sounds like childish scapegoating. Feel fee to give me examples i may be overlooking.

ChessieJackson t1_it8bvd2 wrote on October 21, 2022 at 5:44 PM

Dude they do it. Where I work there are people who they just don't like from day one and they make their lives miserable. Notice the wrong thing, unturn the wrong stone, or speak out about the wrong thing you're done.

I work in a safety related field in transportation. It's a joke and everyone involved knows and nobody will do shit about it.

hairysnowmonkey t1_it8eywt wrote on October 21, 2022 at 6:05 PM

I believe you and without sarcasm or humor I'm sorry people like that have any sway over your life. It may be just philosophically reframing, but i doubt people who know you or me will judge us as failures by any unfortunate proximity to those people or their damage. The industry I worked in and the specific business were also unfunny jokes. Perhaps you and I succeeded by not playing along with those unfunny punchlines. Here's to those bastards keeping misery to themselves.

ChessieJackson t1_it8fvd2 wrote on October 21, 2022 at 6:11 PM

Thanks. If I didn't have a passion for my job I wouldn't care. Everyday I work it's like the movie Idiocracy. You'd think after 21 years you'd get numb to it, but I'm not. Every time I think things are going to improve I just end up disappointed. I tried to lead change and that did nothing but paint a target on my back.