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Vapur9 t1_ivr9m12 wrote

Don't tell me what to do!


Gainsborough-Smythe OP t1_ivr9q4r wrote

Oh go on then, hug the cactus.


SpiceySandworm t1_ivseon9 wrote

Wouldn't hugging the cactus be the opposite of negativity since you are embracing what life has given you?


felixamente t1_ivsl2pv wrote

This is why platitudes and slogans intended to motivate people rarely ever do so.


Metamorphis t1_ivsvl0c wrote

Ye, sometimes these platitudes and slogans are used in ways or situations the person saying it hasn't thought about cus they ain't going through the same thing, or just didn't think it was THAT serious

Some people try to be motivating for the sake of being motivating, feel good about themselves and/or REALLY do try to help out and be supportive etc. which is great, it just sucks for everyone when it doesn't hit home which can happen sometimes =/ (This is also where I think "it's the thought that counts" fits well and make a ton of difference, a friend of mine may not know how to help/talk well but goddamnit if he hasn't taken me to McDonald's and said "Idk how I can better help you but here's a burger" and that made me tear up more than any shrink has been able to make me do tbh)


Faulty_Segment t1_ivtqc57 wrote

The “hugging” action is negativity. The cactus is the situation.

You don’t embrace hardship with negativity. You simply accept it. On the other end, you also don’t want to resist/deny/avoid the fact you were given a cactus.

Then you think “alright I got this cactus which isn’t that great. What can I do at this point to improve and/or continue my journey?”


CyberNinja23 t1_ivrfyu6 wrote

Let me just search that in Urban Dictionary real quick.


sktipwr t1_ivsd8co wrote

I'm still waiting here. You said Real Quick


RefikCan t1_ivs4rmi wrote

Sometimes cactus wants some love too


aridamus t1_ivsn1ko wrote

It’s an Arizonan tradition, don’t ya know?! We gotta hug at least 1 a year or else the scorpion king comes to Phoenix and slaughters until he is satisfied.


xisonc t1_ivrbb1r wrote

I am Canadian.

You bet your ass I hugged a cactus the first time I ever saw one in person.


garbagedmp t1_ivs8psw wrote

As an American who's grandparents were all Canadian, I feel sad I missed the opportunity to participate in the sacred cactus hugging ceremony of my ancestors.

Right? Yeah, that's right. This is the only answer.


vnummela1 t1_ivrnga6 wrote

Yeah but usually when life gives you "cactus" youre already bent over. And the cactus is only going to accelerate from there.


ILuvYou_YouAreSoGood t1_ivqhy1t wrote

What if I'm just too positive though? I wake up thinking "I'm gonna stay up super late and I am sure I will feel great and perform well tomorrow! I'm gonna use life destroying drugs with no negative consequences at all! I'm gonna make thoughtless decisions in my personal and private life and rest assured that everything will be wonderful forever!". A bit of negativity might be just what I need to stay on the level, even keeled.


RadioactiveTF2 t1_ivscf3n wrote

Thats not positivity. Thats naivety. You’re right though, its important to know the difference.


SuperRette t1_ivssax1 wrote

There's a reason toxic positivity is so hated.


theamazingzuchinni t1_ivsb1ab wrote

Actually constant positivity can be way more toxic. Sometimes you have to be negative, and by "negative" I mean a realist and honest with the situation.

I've been handed a cactus, I know I can't hug it or touch it, it doesn't need water and much care, and it doesn't give me anything, in fact it's pretty useless, and it's not even pretty. But you know what? I can put it on my freaking table, or my window ledge to be reminded that not everything is a pretty orchid, sometimes something is an ugly, prickly cactus, that can actually give me a pretty flower sometimes, more times not, and that's ok.

Because people don't need constant sickening positivity to get motivated, they need reality that reminds them why they're doing what they're doing and when it's ok to stop.


felixamente t1_ivslbyw wrote

I think cactuses (cacti?) are pretty. But otherwise yah I agree platitudes and cliches are not helpful and dilute the real motivation.


theamazingzuchinni t1_ivsls89 wrote

Both correct I think, in English and Latin respectively. And yeah they're motherfreaking pretty. And lemons are delicious on their own, too. (You know, make lemonade and shit, actually you already got the cactus bit, I'm guessing you got that, too)


SupernerdSven t1_ivr71jv wrote

I don't know about you, but I'd hug my cactus if it were big enough. It's too small for that so right now I just pet it.


ArizonaSpartan t1_ivriizz wrote

Live in AZ, hugging cactus is a statewide hobby. Besides - Bleed more today, bleed less tomorrow.


mordinvan t1_ivrrnji wrote

It's way easier when people aren't hitting you with the cactus however.


jmd_akbar t1_ivrwmni wrote

Cut the cactus. And drink the juice...

So you can say hello to the giant mushroom... 😜


ndenatale t1_ivrt05z wrote

I appreciate what you are trying to say; but sometimes you are dealt a shitty hand and things just suck.

Being unhappy and a little negative is fine, just don't let it dominate you. Do what you can to move on with your life.


luckysilverdragon t1_ivry7gm wrote

negativity can be cathartic sometimes though, and help with the emotional healing process. but being negative about everything all the time definitely won’t help anyone. save your negativity for when there is reason to be/feel negative


StickyDuck t1_ivr33cx wrote

That gave me a good chuckle


KhmerAssassin t1_ivrnd52 wrote

If you don't hug it, you're fired.


pirate694 t1_ivrwv0h wrote

Hug it? Been fuckin myself with it....


zjuka t1_ivthy5j wrote

Everything is a dildo if you’re brave enough


ph30nix01 t1_ivtdl0m wrote

Well we know what it can be if you are brave enough.


CraazzyCatCommander t1_ivtwdnd wrote

To all of the people pointing out toxic positivity, I HATE toxic positivity, but not all positivity is toxic.

Like, you do know that in general being positive is a good thing right? It only gets toxic when you refuse to a knowledge reality or feel negative feelings.


Harpo426 t1_ivu65nc wrote

Forced optimism can be as suffocating as unceasing negativity. Assess the world honestly


TheGrumpyre t1_ivrqktn wrote

Janet's a little confused, but she'll get you Eleanor Shelstrop's files soon


[deleted] t1_ivrv15o wrote

So is the idea in this image and most others like it just ignoring entirely how difficult and negative daily life is? “You don’t have to hug it” what if someone is forcing me too over and over again forever? Isn’t it easier just to accept that everything in our daily lives is a miraculous shit show and the only way to get over it is revel in it


FckSuccess t1_ivrz5oj wrote

Sometimes it is hard to just say NO to negativity! One needs other tools!


iRedditApp t1_ivsggpz wrote

What if I WANT to hug it?


zjuka t1_ivtipxp wrote

I had a friend like that. There isn’t a cactus that he wouldn’t try to hug or fight. Quite unfortunate, really decent person otherwise. But at some point you grow really weary of helping a grown-ass man disentangle himself from yet another cactus, that for some reason he thought would be a different experience from a previous cactus encounter.


Agorar t1_ivsqyz0 wrote

Cacti are cool though.


enduring_student t1_ivsy3fx wrote

This one made me laugh, in a good way. Thank you!


f4porno t1_ivt055k wrote

This sounds more anti positivity? Don’t respond with hugs


adviceKiwi t1_ivsbfrp wrote

Did You hear about the cactus thief?

He was a prickly one...


kejovo t1_ivsbqwa wrote

Cactuses deserve love too!


MACMAN2003 t1_ivsdye4 wrote

i've got a guy in my head that tells me that if i don't hug the cactus my entire family will die


walkinginthesky t1_ivsgilj wrote

Wow... lol this is the first time I've ever heard this sentiment this way. Thanks OP! Edit: I can't believe people downvoted this comment. I think people thought I was being sarcastic. I wasn't 🤷 lol


joshtalon t1_ivsl1o6 wrote

Paige enters the chat


louisme97 t1_ivsr5lf wrote

im 100% sure that negativity is fuel for some people.
I mean who defines whats good and bad?
I personally allmost allways stay happy and chill because thats the "soil" i thrive in, but others maybe just dont.
I personally cant stand those people but they gotta live their own life.


[deleted] t1_ivsvkae wrote

I think this is nicest boomer-made meme I’ve seen 🙌🏼


Werfgh t1_ivt749d wrote

but the cactus looks so huggable


Firuost t1_ivtclsq wrote

Wait, no hugging? I thought we were supposed to stay positive!


Goddamnmint t1_ivtvojt wrote

Until you wake up locked in a room with a cactus and hear "Wanna play a little game?"


gremlinofthekremlin t1_ivtz4s7 wrote

Then 🤔HWY🤔 is it called the Huguaro Cactus, hmmmmmm¿¿¿???


thecwestions t1_ivrye0q wrote

Aww. But that's the most huggable cactus! Fuck it. I'm going for it!


onlooker61 t1_ivrzh1z wrote

Whatever happened to "embrace your difficulties" Now you say you don't have to...


westwardnomad t1_ivs2t8a wrote

What if you are a cactus and just need a hug? Thanks a lot bud...


Mrrandom314159 t1_ivsdk6s wrote

Why be sad? Life gave you free ammunition.


PingouinMalin t1_ivthdfy wrote

Ah yeah, the good old "internalize your feelings, be strong, never weak, keep positive".

Then one day after all this positivity, you end in ER after a major mental breakdown.

Litterally fuck that. Bad things happen, people get hurt, they should never be ashamed of showing weakness or despair. It's a normal answer to some punches life delivers.

It's litterally "you're unhappy ? Stop."


ThyShirtIsBlue t1_ivv8oal wrote

This is not advice, it's toxic positivity. Telling a person that they are wrong for having feelings will only serve to make them feel invalidated, isolated, condescended to and further frustrate them while sending them a signal that you are not a person to trust with their feelings.

If someone in your personal life starts venting to you, do them a favor and keep this to yourself, and just listen to them instead.


tjfoz t1_ivza0v5 wrote

What a dumb quote