For me it was Trauma and living in survival mode - it never got switched "off" as an adult because my environment was never truly safe for me.

It is safe now, I've gone to therapy and understand now that whenever I feel unsafe - aka reacting from a Trauma response - my main reaction is FLIGHT. This looks like avoidance, procrastination, dissociation and even laziness to others and myself. My whole life I let others convince me that I was lazy, when all my brain was doing was trying to protect itself the only way it knew how.

Thanks to therapy I've started to change how I react to things, I've become mindful to it, and it helps me stop my trauma responses anywhere from in the moment to days after. Recognizing it was the first step to changing it.

I no longer use the words lazy or procrastination. I no longer believe they're real concepts, I think they're words used by misunderstanding how our brain functions. It's too bad because shame was the main driver of me never asking myself why I felt that way: it made me assume I was a failure and a bad human. The reality was I was actually just being human.