Submitted by Ok-Reporter-8728 t3_1092yib in GetMotivated

I have so many problems about me that I have no idea where to start at all.

Lazy, sad, lonely, unconfident the list just goes on. This has been a thing for a long time and I really really wanna try my best to fix my life but I just don’t know what to do. Any advice I will read I just want to be happy again.

I also just don’t know how to get motivated…

This is my first time posting these stuff too.

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mica8819 t1_j3vrjqj wrote

Try adding (or subtracting) one thing at a time, maybe every week or every other week. Go slow - if you try to change your life completely and immediately it’s unlikely it will stick.

I’d start with daily yoga. Yoga with Adrienne does monthly calendars for free on YouTube. It has so many benefits and is easily accessible. Give it a chance.

And be kind and gentle to yourself. The only one who can change your life is you, and you are your own mentor, guide, companion, etc. would you rather have a mentor that’s demeaning and discouraging or understanding and uplifting?

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ZestycloseWallaby563 t1_j3vrkf7 wrote

going to therapy genuinely changed my life for the better.

i struggle with suicidal thoughts, severe depression, borderline personality disorder, and the list unfortunately goes on. i come from an extremely abusive family that made me the punching bag, so i fully understand the weight all the emotions have on a person.

dialectical behavioral therapy has giving me the skills to communicate properly, to understand how im feeling and how to change it in a healthy way, to understand how to work through my emotions in a healthy way.

its not easy to look inward and to try to change but once you do, it opens so many doors for growth and self love. i wish you the best on your mental journey and remember to not give up.

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cazoo222 t1_j3vsfyk wrote

Motivation comes and goes, discipline is how you will progress in anything

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EnrichYourLifeFit t1_j3vvsyz wrote

I like the others' suggestions. Another good way to start is to try watching or listening to self-growth podcasts, YT videos, Ted Talks, or reading self-growth books or audiobooks.

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[deleted] t1_j3w2tic wrote

As cheesy as it sounds....the self help books really do get you fired up and have good advice.

Try atomic habits by James clear. If it doesn't change anything, it will at least get you thinking about why you do the things that you do!

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eejjkk t1_j3wbl7r wrote

After looking at your post history, it has come to my attention that you sir are a karma farmer. Have a downvote.

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Dutch_Daulton10 t1_j3wdlyd wrote

My job allows me to be lazy and sleep til 8:30. When I wake up early at 6-6:30 I notice my mental health is off to a good start. I think it's because I'm happy with myself that I got up early. I need to make this a daily habit.

Also, I bet you that I and many other people have fucked up worse 😀. I ain't throwin in the towel.

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RG7748 t1_j3xfmyi wrote

Start small, don’t try to change everything at once. If ur lazy start by setting an alarm to get up at the same time every morning, don’t snooze it and don’t think just cuz u have nothing to do, u stay in bed. Make the bed, don’t leave it in a state and cook a breakfast.

Once that becomes a habit, fill ur time. start by spending 30 min of everyday on something to improve urself. If you think you don’t have 30 min, then ur just gonna have to get up 30 min earlier everyday. Improving urself could be something physical or mental.

Physically, yoga or gym will probably get the results u want depending on whether u want to look good or feel good.

Mentally, Being comfortably with urself is more important than trying to be someone else. Self help books are gimmicky but work for some and you should try it out before dismissing it. Mindfulness or inspirational podcast may do the trick too. Don’t spend money unless you exhausted google for free resources first or else you will just clutter ur house with shit u don’t need which will make u more sad on wasted money.

If you have the money, the best resource would be a therapist to work through the issues and help you be more comfortable being urself but it’s very expensive and not available for all.

Solving the loneliness problem will be a long journey which involves putting urself out there. Find a club or activity u like and join it. You make friends naturally from just doing the same thing with the same people every week. I wouldn’t recommend dating until you are happier cuz I find dating destroys the self esteem when it doesn’t work out.

Good luck.

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Sassy_2412 t1_j3ym2us wrote

I relate. When I was really depressing, I was feeling similar. People said to me do somethinf you like... yeah what do I like, what do I enjoy... and then my sister came to pass an evening with me and said could we draw ? So we just draw a drawing kid book. For me it did not needed to be something big. My advise ? Don't overthink it. Go walk in the wood, read a book, watch a kid movie, draw a flower. Most importantly do things with people you appreciate. This really helped me.

Good luck :)

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wutstatrs t1_j3zo9ak wrote

The route that helped me up the first steps was:

YouTube David Goggins or read his book Can’t Hurt Me. (Physical) There’s also Jordan Peterson lectures from when he taught in a classroom. (Mental) Or watch the movie Mully, which is a true story and not loosely based.(Faith) Basically just have to find something that you can either relate to or feel connected with. And motivation is nothing without action. Good luck!! You got this!!!

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