Hey man, why not go join the military? The army, navy, and Airforce have age limits that are between 35-39. They can provide you structure and discipline, which is something you seem to really need even at this point in your life. Go learn a cool trade, get hands on with your work, travel, and go to college for free when you get out.

But the fundamental problem is that you're an adult who is refusing to take ownership and accountability of his mistakes. You fucked up, a lot bro, but it's okay because they're lessons learned, or at least they should be. Acknowledge it, accept it, now pick up your trash and keep trudging up that hill because that's what life is all about.