A husband decides to make a quick run to the store, while his wife waits at home. A few minutes after he leaves the house, his guy friend shows up, hoping to speak with him.

Seeing that the husband is not home, the friend says he’ll come back later but is invited in by the wife. As the two of them make small talk in the living room, there’s a moment of awkward silence.

Looking at the wife’s face, the friend brazenly offers to give her $100 if he can kiss her on her right cheek. Blushful but tempted by the money, the wife accepts the deal. After one kiss, he offers another $100. Once again, the wife accepts a kiss, this time on her left cheek.

The friend then bids her goodbye and leaves. Finally, the husband returns home, and the wife quickly stuffs the money in her pocket. She tells him his friend had just visited. Of course, she leaves out the kissing part. Her husband looks at her and asks, “Did he pay back the $200 he owed me?”

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[deleted] t1_itpehx5 wrote on October 25, 2022 at 10:23 AM

#216,211

Kiss on the cheek?

Not only is this not a dad joke, this is not the joke. It makes no sense.

[deleted] t1_itpelvz wrote on October 25, 2022 at 10:24 AM

#216,219

[removed]

[deleted] t1_itpescd wrote on October 25, 2022 at 10:27 AM

#216,246

A woman’s at home while her husband is at work.

After getting out of the shower, there’s a knock at the door. Wrapped only in a towel, she answers the door to find her husbands friend with a handful of cash.

He looks her up and down, holds out the wad of cash and says “I’ll give you $500 to drop the towel.”

She thinks about it for a second, then drops the towel. He takes a good look, gives her the money and then leaves without a word.

When her husband gets home from work, she mentions his friend came around earlier.

Her husband asks “Did be pay back the $500 he owes me?”

keyboardstatic t1_itpfvo2 wrote on October 25, 2022 at 10:40 AM

#216,346

There is a girl playing in the yard when her neighbour comes past. He is the same age and they start playing. She has a little dog, chickes and pigs with her. Since they live on a farm.

Then he says can I kiss you.

Only if you promise to close your eyes. And only open them when I say you can.

Of course he scowled everyone knows you close your eyes when kissing.

So he closes his eyes and leans forward lips puckered.

Wait a moment. She says.

Then he feels her lean in her cheek or mouth is all bristles and smells a bit funny.

He kisses it thoughly. She giggles. Then says open your eyes.

He opens his eyes oh I didn't know you were so bristly he says. My hair fell down when we kissed.

May I have another he asked.

The girl nodded.

This time a long wet tongue licks him from chin to nose .

Ahhh he yells in surprise opening his eyes.