Two people go into an empty bus...

Submitted by CK17_live t3_ygm5oy in Jokes

three go out.

The biologist says: "They reproduced"

The physicist says: "There was a measuring error"

The mathematician says: "Now one has to go in so there`s noone in the bus"

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Automatic-Exit-1090 t1_iu9b4nu wrote

A different guy: "wonder why the bus driver is getting arrested?"

441

Fskn t1_iuac9e1 wrote

And the nun was really the bus driver all along

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pedro_pascal_123 t1_iuaed6a wrote

And that nun's name? Albert Einstein...

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AlmightyCrumble t1_iubg5lg wrote

But it wasn't really him, it was his chauffeur ...

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alphadeeto t1_iubnirs wrote

And his name? Dave.

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mroboto2016 t1_iuc2ftw wrote

Dave's not here.

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ACED70 t1_iubxmkl wrote

I have no idea where this thread is going, and I love it.

3

hezzospike t1_iubz1t9 wrote

These are all references to past jokes/Reddit lore

3

MistraloysiusMithrax t1_iuc7sv0 wrote

Omg, you did it Reddit. We found them. It was like a reverse game of Where’s Waldo, where Waldo had to realize he was being looked for and stepped forward. But we found him, he found us, and we know there is, really truly is, one among us who DOESN’T KNOW DAVE. Super sus.

The real treasure was the frien…gunshots treasure. And someone got that treasure. And that little girl? It Dave

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SlackerNinja717 t1_iu9rgrm wrote

The philosopher says: "How would you like your latte?"

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gacoperz t1_iu9t1dd wrote

Without milk.

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HilbertGrandHotel t1_iu9y087 wrote

So, just espresso? (Which is the superior form of coffee)

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gacoperz t1_iu9z97g wrote

Unless you are Italian, for whom latte is milk, so just a cup of air to ponder on the futility of existence.

But I'd prefer that espresso.

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Avakining t1_iuaj5tv wrote

The programmer says: “there are now 255 people on the bus”

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mvp_lon t1_iubp79n wrote

Man overflow and underflow fucked me in my final cause i forgot about it

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JimDixon t1_iu99szo wrote

The Republican says: "The count was stolen!"

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aimed_4_the_head t1_iu9iq39 wrote

The Republican says that no matter what the count was

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Grigoran t1_iub5a7v wrote

They said it a few weeks before the two went into the bus, which was strange.

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iamsoldats t1_iuax6gf wrote

As do the Dems when they lose.

−7

Grigoran t1_iub5xzv wrote

Dems in 2016: We launched an investigation to show whether foreign nations interfered markedly in our nation's elections. We uncovered efforts of that nature by certain nations, here are the receipts.

Republicans in 2020: Democrats voted 3 times each, changed all the votes at the machine despite paper audits, resurrected Hugo Chavez, used bamboo paper from Gyna, had 50 million illegals vote, and everyone knows zero people really voted for Biden because no one has Biden signs.

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Carlos----Danger t1_iubc47g wrote

Dems in 2016: Trump is illegitimate, "impeach this mother fucker!" after Obama does nothing

Dems in 2020: with Republicans in charge it was the most secure election ever and rewriting history again

−7

peter-forward t1_iuawer6 wrote

The support technician suggests you restart the bus and try again.

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Astra1839 t1_iu9zn9n wrote

For people who didn't get it, the mathematician means that one has to go in so there's noone in the bus

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Eversnuffley t1_iuaa4ia wrote

The mathematician counted to -1

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Initial-Space-7822 t1_iuafzlx wrote

It obviously wasn't the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers then. He would stop at nothing to avoid them.

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everything_is_bad t1_iuaxlx6 wrote

But then if one goes in, won't there be noone on the bus?

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Grigoran t1_iub6c93 wrote

Indeed. That's why the mathematician says that now one must go in so that there is no noone on the bus.

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Tidesticky t1_iucvmvj wrote

But won't there also be noone on the other bus?

1

bobanovski t1_iuciofc wrote

Hmm when I heard this joke before the punch line was:

Mathematician says "we define an empty bus as the bus with one person in it"

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ch061 t1_iuao0hd wrote

The engineer looks at the bus and decides a train would work better

The IRA member makes sure no one comes out

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Kind_Bullfrog_4073 t1_iuaqgwp wrote

The Keanu says: "We have to keep this bus going over 50 miles per hour"

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Waitsfornoone t1_iuaszd6 wrote

The Hippy: "These mushrooms are fantastic."

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Do_not_use_after t1_iub4ztr wrote

The journalist says: Did I forget to mention a third person got in at the next stop? Such are the ways of clickbait.

8

ulfzwulf t1_iubu09v wrote

Only one person can go in an empty bus…

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AmongstYou666 t1_iuakumb wrote

The magician says: "And for my next trick, something you will actually find to be funny."

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Deadlock07 t1_iuc3971 wrote

God: WHY DOES NONE OF THE CODE WORK, I JUST WANT TO BIULD A UNIVERSE!!

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MandoMark t1_iubt27r wrote

The Engineer asks “So whos driving the bus?“

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Bismuth941 t1_iucalr2 wrote

Schrodinger says: Well the bus was either empty of people or had someone in it.

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Natomiast t1_iuckumu wrote

Hemningway says: And they all die. In rain.

3

Flemeron t1_iuas8by wrote

Max Stirner says: "The third is a spook!"

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mroboto2016 t1_iuc2lzo wrote

Trump says it's fake news.

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danorcs t1_iuct7et wrote

The pastor says “that’s the spirit!”

2

DeputyDoGooder t1_iubsqfr wrote

Tony Little exercises outside of the bus.

1

emwtur t1_iuczjcx wrote

Karl Marx claims it was offside

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-engiblogger- t1_iud601q wrote

The electrical engineer says: “The first two were electrocuted by the bus as the third was 90° out of phase at the time of insertion.”

1

Stan_Archton t1_iufhs2p wrote

The Christian says, "Behold. He has returned!"

1

Driphtyyy t1_iubqvkq wrote

The Donald Trump say : “China”

😂

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