Submitted by jnelsoninjax t3_z4wn66 in Jokes

Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy". I call my dog "Sex".

Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to get his license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like to have one too." Then I said, "But this is a dog." He said I didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "You don't understand, I've had Sex since I was 9 years old." He said I must have been quite a kid.

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the place was for sex. I said, "You don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night." The Clerk said, "Me too."

One day I entered Sex in a contest but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex enter in the contest. He told me that I should have sold tickets. "But you don't understand", I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on television." He called me a show-off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to file for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I got married." The judge said, "Me too." Then I told him that after I was married, Sex had left me. He said, "Me too."

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked "What are you doing in this alley at 4 in the morning?" I said, "I'm looking for Sex..."

My court date has been set for Friday...

209

Comments

You must log in or register to comment.

Supovitz t1_ixt5dzd wrote

OP meant to give credit to humorist Morty Storm who penned this in 1966

86

SadLaser t1_ixvxcuk wrote

Who names their dog Boy? Also, if the character in this joke is buffoon enough to not ever properly explain Sex is an actual canine (or just say "my dog" when talking to strangers, because no one just says the dog's name and assumes people understand it's their dog), he deserves all the shit he gets! I know it's just a joke, but it still annoys me!

1

Zisx t1_iy1qxeo wrote

Statement in court:

"Everybody loved Sex. I loved seeing Sex with both youngin's and the elderly, always brightened their day. I cannot live without Sex. And yes, I regularly had Sex out in public"

1