An Englishman, a Scot and an Irishman are walking in a park when a genie appears out of nowhere

Submitted by appleboi_69420 t3_z75vqm in Jokes

The genie also magics up a slide, and says to them, "Whatever you wish for when sliding down this slide will be waiting at the bottom for you."

The Englishman goes first. "Gold!" He yells as he slides down, and, true to the genie's word, he lands in a huge room, full to the brim with gold.

The Scot goes down and says, "Jewels!" And he also lands in a room filled with jewels.

Finally it is the Irishman's turn and, as he goes down the slide, yells out,

"Weeeeee!"

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caltroppsederapp42 t1_iy5lhxs wrote

An Irish priest is driving along a country road when a policeman pulls him over.
He immediately smells alcohol on the priest's breath and notices an empty wine bottle in the car.
He says: "Have you been drinking?"
"Just water," says the priest.
The cop replies: "Then why do I smell wine?"
The priest looks at the bottle and says: "Good Lord! He's done it again!"

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MasterFubar t1_iy5k26e wrote

When he realizes he's sliding too fast and will crash at the end: "Shit!"

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TheRealCactusTiddy t1_iy6jras wrote

three men are standing near a cliff. a genie appears and tells them, "whatever you shout when you jump off this cliff, you will transform into that thing."

the first man jumps off and says "eagle". he turns into an eagle and flies away.

the second man jumps off and yells "spider-man". instantly, he transforms into spider-man and web-swings away.

the third man trips on a rock, and as he goes over the edge he yells "shit!"

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NazzDX t1_iy4ya24 wrote

Lucky man. Most of us have to pay for it.

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MAPUGA t1_iy7r0u6 wrote

I heard this one, but the last guy slipped and fell, so he yelled "CRAP!"

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RepublicVegetable736 t1_iy72ts0 wrote

An Englishman and a Scotsman are driving though the countryside. The Scotsman is driving and sees a sheep with its head stuck in a fence. The Scotsman slammed on the brakes, jumps out of the car, runs over to the sheep. He humps the sheep then runs back to the car, saying "Your turn!"

The Englishman jumps out of the car, runs over to the fence, and sticks his head in it.

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GMN123 t1_iy5on0h wrote

I used to tell this one regularly when I was in primary school 30 years ago.

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666Darkside666 t1_iy62v4o wrote

I hate to admit it, but I don't get it.

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All-Fired-Up91 t1_iy8dxmf wrote

The end will be full of poo to put it simply

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yoshiauditore t1_iy7p2vo wrote

I’m 90% sure this was the earliest joke I ever heard in my life

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MEdoCRYaLOT t1_iy8ecml wrote

i know it differently.

Theres word of a magical water slide, and whatever you wish for will be what you land in, once you arrive at the end.

So three friends go out on a journey to find the slide, and eventually when they were already old, they did.

They're all stoked to have finally made it and one by one take the slide. The first man yells out money, and once he's through all the twists and turns of the slide he lands in a pool filled with dollar bills and coins.

The second man goes through and yells out, Youth serum, and once he's through he lands in a vat of shiny liquid, which makes him young again.

The third man thinks very hard about this. but before he could come up with something he slips and yells out SHIT.

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