Submitted by MudakMudakov t3_zntcd9 in Jokes
Jesus: The what?
Judas: I meant the supper. Are you coming to the supper?
Comments
________________me t1_j0j3xl9 wrote
Table for 24 please
DeplorableKurt t1_j0jawue wrote
hahaha all sitting one way would be preferred
obiscrabbles t1_j0jhkj2 wrote
r/therealjoke
Actual_Hyena3394 t1_j0jkk9l wrote
You have to give them credit though. Their dinner photo game was fire. Food displayed on the table and the people are all in the photo. The dinner table photos nowadays are basically a big table in the middle with everyone around craning their necks and most of the time there is at least one head missing.
JJohnston015 t1_j0jpoaz wrote
Fun fact: the original version got mistranslated. It wasn't "walked on water", it was "walked on waiter".
SirJudasIscariot t1_j0jryyb wrote
You will be very sore and have quite the headache, but don’t worry, our Roman buddies will put you up for the night.
Steady-Nutty t1_j0jsatc wrote
/r/RickyGervais
GormlessFuck t1_j0jyn6o wrote
What's this (puts out hands like being crucified)?
A real cunt of a way to spend Easter!
Initial_E t1_j0k1dm9 wrote
HelixViewer t1_j0k1o0r wrote
He was the treasurer. He had all the money.
Terrin369 t1_j0k2e8g wrote
Because they were only using one side of the table. 13 people on one side. Jesus and 12 apostles.
OrganizdConfusion t1_j0k3xh7 wrote
Haha #84
Handsome_nhung t1_j0k83kw wrote
This isn’t funny, this is stupid as fuck.
Lucymygirl t1_j0k8opk wrote
Don’t appreciate. Keep scrolling
JamesFromToronto t1_j0kbwds wrote
Nailed it.
Velvet_Pop t1_j0kfm3n wrote
"...Wait a second, he took all our fish too!"
alldaywatcher t1_j0khbdb wrote
If there was a last one there must have been a one before that, so this, is the "Penultimate Supper"!
SkillusEclasiusII t1_j0khkos wrote
I'll keep this in mind next time I'm going out for dinner.
ernSOFTLtd t1_j0kishf wrote
Biblical.
sarcastic_chandler t1_j0knv8o wrote
Are we friends IRL??
Simonandgarthsuncle t1_j0knyxb wrote
Is that a Mitch Hedberg joke? I thought he said something along these lines but can’t find it.
ReasonableArgument65 t1_j0kp4rb wrote
If Jesus could make wine out of water maybe he was walking on wine so he was just drunk going home...
_dantastic t1_j0kp8yb wrote
Jesus: "Water for everyone!"
Waiter: "May I see your ID?"
tuesdaysatmorts t1_j0kspm9 wrote
Walked on Walter
Roku-Hanmar t1_j0kst7y wrote
They know, they’re just correcting the other person
01kickassius10 t1_j0kvkvt wrote
Jesus saw his apostles eating Chinese takeout and asked where they got it from.
Peter replied: “apparently Judas has come into some money”
tommytraddles t1_j0kz6lp wrote
It's older than that. It was going to be in a scene from Life of Brian, but they cut it.
Here's Michael Palin talking about it: https://youtu.be/AimvcjtlUX0
________________me t1_j0l05hg wrote
Who picked up the check tho?
Or did they split?
'I had only water'
'Not, it was wine!'
Ibarraramon t1_j0l2ert wrote
Mel Brooks was the waiter. 😁
Shock-Robin t1_j0l30sa wrote
Even as a devout Christian, I think it's hilarious.
Terrin369 t1_j0l3bod wrote
Oh missed that lol
BigBradWolf07 t1_j0l59fh wrote
I wonder where he could've gotten exactly 30 pieces of silver..?
UtherDoulDoulDoul t1_j0lci5r wrote
ImportedBavarian t1_j0ldybn wrote
Bastard switched the wine for water too.
Double_Lingonberry98 t1_j0lhe6r wrote
It was in History of the World, Part I
UbuntuElphie t1_j0lj61r wrote
No, 24.
JC & the Gang of 12 = 13 - 2 (for the guys sitting at either end) = 11 × 2 (for those sitting on the one side) = 22 + 2 (for the dudes at the ends) = "Table for 24, please."
Even Da Vinci got 11 along the length (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:%C3%9Altima_Cena_-_Da_Vinci_5.jpg)
killswitchuser t1_j0ll8xz wrote
The synagogue of Satan
Neat-Finger197 t1_j0ll9s2 wrote
Et tu, Judas?
Steady-Nutty t1_j0llbuq wrote
Even though you decided to comment instead of scrolling.
TomoyoHoshijiro t1_j0lmufd wrote
Tonight we feast. Tomorrow Judas is taking me to see Nine Inch Nails.
[deleted] t1_j0lqbk3 wrote
[deleted]
ballrus_walsack t1_j0ltm4e wrote
Username checks out
alldaywatcher t1_j0luj4w wrote
Look! The last supper is a significant event in the life of our Lord, the penultimate supper was not! Even if they had a conjurer and a mariachi band.
ikilledsupermario t1_j0lvkh4 wrote
JC and the Gang.
That’s funny as hell!
I dunno when, but I’m gonna use that!
TotemTabuBand t1_j0mcawr wrote
WWJD — What would Judas do? Lol
KinkyButProbStraight t1_j0mdaop wrote
Now that’s funny!
RoverBoyNumber6 t1_j0meva7 wrote
Everybody want to be in the picture? Move to the other side of the table!
Simonandgarthsuncle t1_j0mg8qw wrote
Ahhh, thank you.
DialaDuck t1_j0mhw3g wrote
Donner kebab will do.
ran_melolo t1_j0mj8ek wrote
Judas just equals Tim Minchin for me now
tigellebotongum90 t1_j0mxs37 wrote
A priest, a minister, and a rabbi want to see who’s best at his job.
So each one goes into the woods, finds a bear, and attempts to convert it.Later, they all get together. The priest begins: “When I found the bear, I read to him from the catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Next week is his first Communion.”
“I found a bear by the stream,” says the minister, “and preached God’s holy Word. The bear was so mesmerized that he let me baptize him.”
They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying on a gurney in a body cast.
“Looking back,” he says, “maybe I shouldn’t have started with the circumcision.”
Icy_Scratch7822 t1_j0n1b0k wrote
Freudian, before Freud was a thing.
LOUDCO-HD t1_j0n59k3 wrote
Quick tip, it was a toga party!
screamloudly t1_j0n8bf5 wrote
“Hey redditors, are you coming to the next repost?”
“The what?”
“The post, are you coming to the post?”
Samakira t1_j0necjw wrote
and the 'last supper' was the feast for when they left Egypt, hence why it was a celebration of sorts. it also holds symbolism in that the supper eaten for leaving Egypt was when they 'left their captors', and the last supper was the supper eaten before Believers 'left their captor' (sin), in both cases being guided by God, albeit in the OT, a more literal guide.
Luked0g44O t1_j0nlqfb wrote
That one sure cut deep!🤣
Luked0g44O t1_j0nm75k wrote
Jesus walks into a motel office, drops three nails onto the counter, and asks the manager, “Can you put me up for the night?”
Downtown_Path_2821 t1_j0nsgrz wrote
That’s a hell of a joke
sleezyrydr t1_j0pu38w wrote
Waited on walker?
Actual_Hyena3394 t1_j0qylbe wrote
Be sure to book a table twice the size you need though.
vietfromvietnam t1_j0u8itd wrote
Jesus: hey judas does Satan have a bbc? Sly grin.....
[deleted] t1_j0j1mog wrote
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