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PygmeePony t1_j2e6p5a wrote

Not the bottoms.

514

Visible-Pie-3225 t1_j2frajm wrote

None survived. All drowned due to the weight of the silicon.

−91

Mungo_Clump t1_j2e2kzn wrote

Was it trans Atlantic?

374

Ok_Climate_9254 t1_j2czy56 wrote

The G’s because they already had their shit packed.

162

MJSTEX t1_j2dci1b wrote

No, they couldn’t leave their friends behind

170

edynol t1_j2dgx8n wrote

Fuck you. Here's my upvote.

33

CrownedHeads t1_j2ftlvb wrote

Lmao. I read a tweet recently that a woman was being eaten from behind and their nose touched her butthole. She clinched her cheeks and said “I got your nose!”

17

Waitsfornoone t1_j2ebzwc wrote

Surviving a Sinking Ocean Cruiser? Here's one of my favorites [not OC]:

A cruise ship sinks in the middle of the ocean. Only 2 men and a woman survive the terrible tragedy, and relying on any floating debris, paddle their way to an island they spot nearby.
They make shelters, find food and water and all the basics needed to survive on an island in the middle of the ocean. After 3 months, they finally decide no one is going to rescue them, so they build better shelters and get used to living their lives together on the island.
In the fourth month, the 2 men and the woman start to get certain ... human needs. One night, round the fire, they talk about it and come to an agreement that purely for sexual
desire, they would help each other with this ... human need.
After six weeks of this, the woman feels so guilty about what she has done with the 2 men that she kills herself, as this was not the way she was brought up and she couldn't bear to continue living this way.
A month later, the 2 men start to get certain ... human needs again. One night, round the fire, they talk about it and come to an agreement that purely for sexual desire, they would help each other with this ... human need.
This goes on for about 2 months. Finally, the 2 men feel so guilty about what they have done, they bury her.

124

cadaverescu1 t1_j2egcx5 wrote

2 months later the men feeling guilty about what they were doing to each other decide to dig her up.

38

Either-Historian924 t1_j2fj4r8 wrote

Doesn't matter which scenario you go with - either way, a stiff is getting buried!

5

ILoveLongDogs t1_j2f8881 wrote

There was once a young man named Dave,

Who found a dead whore in a cave.

She was missing a tit, and smelled just like shit,

But think of the money he saved.

33

trebuchet_facts t1_j2e6nda wrote

Not much could be said about the Bi's, the stats go both ways

117

Plopop87 t1_j2fbx89 wrote

We get onto the lifeboats, but we sit on them in such a weird way that we end up falling off anyway

25

Madmarrdegan t1_j2dppfc wrote

Lesbians. They can survive on clams

69

cookerg t1_j2e0jq0 wrote

They didn't have enough lifeboats to get everybody ported to safety, so they only had the transported.

48

Stock-Restaurant-673 t1_j2edbih wrote

Highly interested to see the debate after the captain says “women and children in the lifeboat first”.

10

GoodRevolutionary657 t1_j2f1o4i wrote

The lesbians because when everybody was grabbing lifeboats the girls were all “Lickity split”, but the boys were still busy packing their shit!

12

RowdyDugong t1_j2fg88q wrote

Certainly not the lesbians,they're all going down.

10

Charliethebrit t1_j2depxy wrote

I think if you drop the s, it still works well :)

7

1_Shanel t1_j2eio82 wrote

Why can’t I grasp this

6

joey_yamamoto t1_j2ew859 wrote

buoyancy means to float ....so the flamboyant float

11

1_Shanel t1_j2f9isa wrote

Ehhh smirk to this, at best but thank you

0

rktek85 t1_j2enxwz wrote

Before sinking, 2 dudes aee having sex during which they both have a heart attack and die. Which one goes to heaven first? The guy on the bottom or top. The dude on the bottom. He already has his shit packed

6

boganiser t1_j2fk808 wrote

A lot. At least half released their inner seamen.

5

MindOfAMurderer t1_j2fk0kp wrote

No one, for we are all equal in the eyes of death

2

TrickyLemons t1_j2fvz5f wrote

blåhaj will swim you to safety

2

SylvieJay t1_j2ewxuw wrote

People in the licker Cabinet.

1

ramaham t1_j2f1x18 wrote

none, they all went down

1

Sigma865 t1_j2fudi5 wrote

Who got on the lifeboats first?

1

GEM592 t1_j2fuzke wrote

plus why would you even ask that

−2

chipslayer1 t1_j2e8sm8 wrote

I mean if everyone identifies as survived before they sink they should be clear. Right?

−3

tiralixo t1_j2esd2q wrote

Dave Chappelle

−5

vr0202 t1_j2fc2uq wrote

Unlikely those with silicone implants.

−5

3vi1 t1_j2exl66 wrote

Not if one of them lights a match. They'd just be called buoyants, if not for all the hydrogen.

−8

[deleted] t1_j2feh4r wrote

[deleted]

−10

Away_Ad1323 t1_j2flvep wrote

The only one less likely to reproduce ist you (fortunately(

1

Actual-Anywhere-8829 t1_j2fpjub wrote

You can be straight cis and flamboyant. Pretty fucked up how ignorant you are. Let's try to be a little more inclusive. Your joke is outrageously offensive.

−10

Blizz_PL t1_j2ewf9o wrote

I thought the answer would be society.

−14

[deleted] t1_j2fgkb2 wrote

[removed]

−15

Vegetable-Shift-7751 t1_j2eb7cw wrote

None because they were too busy arguing whether gay or lesbian was better and they all went down with the ship!

−23