A woman goes to the doctor

Submitted by Nl_003 t3_10njfpa in Jokes

With an massive stomach ache.

"Ok", says the doctor, "please lie down on your back let me examine you". He proceeds to push her stomach with both hands and "BRAAAAB" she lets out a huge fart.

"Could you roll to the side" and she does as requested. The doctor presses down again and indeed, another "BRAAAB".

The doctor then leaves the room and comes back with a stick with a hook at one end.

The woman jumps up in panic and screams: "what the hell do you think you are doing?!"

"Relax", says the doctor, "I'm going to open a window."

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super-me-5000 t1_j6922wv wrote

Just when I needed some comic relief, very funny!

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Waitsfornoone t1_j6981hk wrote

If we're doing doctor's office jokes:

A woman goes to the doctor and says: “Doctor, my husband is an animal in the bedroom. He wants sex five, six, seven times a day. I love the man and the sex, but it’s just too much. Can you help me?”
The doctor replied, “Well, medically, I can’t really think of anything. Theoretically, this might work. From now on, whenever he demands sex, demand money. $10 in the kitchen, $30 in the living room, $50 in the bedroom. The man isn’t made of money, that should slow him down.”
She agrees and thanks the doctor. Excited, she goes home ready to use his advice.
She starts to prepare dinner. Her husband comes home, doesn’t even ask about dinner, but immediately sneaks up behind her, brushes up against her and plays grab ass. She turns to him and says. “Honey, I have a new rule regarding sex.”

He replies, “Okay hon, shoot!” She continues, “From now on, I demand money for sex. $10 in the kitchen, $30 in the living room, $50 in the bedroom.”
He looks at her and says, “Okay, I think you deserve that, you do so much, no problem.”
He reaches for his wallet and sees he has a $50 bill in his wallet and hands it to his wife. She says, “Okay let’s go up to the bedroom.”
He shouts, “NO, FIVE TIMES IN THE KITCHEN!!!”

Not OC. https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/sa5qdp/a_woman_goes_to_the_doctor_and_says/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

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ozthegweat t1_j6adz0n wrote

I don't get it. Why doesn't he just open a window with his hands, but instead leaves and gets the hook stick?

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SphericalBitch2020 t1_j6bkuy0 wrote

Another doctor, doctor joke....

A man goes into doctors surgery with a frog sitting on his forehead.

What can I do for you, sir? asks the doctor.

A week ago, I got a pimple on my bum and now see what it has grown into, said the frog.

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scifielder t1_j6dn0p5 wrote

A woman goes to the doctor. She tells him, "Doctor, I have a very serious problem."

"What is it?" he asks.

She answers, "Every time I sneeze, I have an orgasm."

The doctor asks, "What have you been doing about it?"

She replies, "I've been in the kitchen, snorting pepper."

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SpareMind t1_j6h53rk wrote

Told to me by a doctor friend:

Patient walked in with stool sample he was asked to bring. Full size horlicks bottle, about 1 kg.

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