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pauliewotsit t1_j6ask26 wrote

Cigarette. Every night I take it out for a drag.

256

Ewetootwo t1_j6c7qoh wrote

And butts it out.

29

derrpinger t1_j6cazyk wrote

All joking aside (as I start to booo myself!): I learned today that “dog end” is a used cigarette butt. Ran across the lyric in “Aqualung” https://youtu.be/N4zPu3ISCGs

And

https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/dog-end

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Cheese-It17 t1_j6arzf4 wrote

Doesn’t matter, it’s not coming.

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EarthMarsUranus OP t1_j6atdjo wrote

Depends on whether you can find a friendly bitch with a winch.

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jimababwe t1_j6bhpnr wrote

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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Jackrwood t1_j6boe0p wrote

List of 10 worst dog breeds:

  1. There
  2. Are
  3. No
  4. Bad
  5. Dog
  6. Breeds
  7. Only
  8. Bad
  9. Owners
  10. Chihuahuas
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Lurifaks1 t1_j6c1mqw wrote

pug

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Kisopop t1_j6crlwh wrote

This. I can't stand their snarly gasps for air. It fills me with pity and disgust.

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Tiedyeinstein t1_j6c5cej wrote

Pitbull/bulldog

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Wonderful_Formal6130 t1_j6d832a wrote

Some of the friendliest dogs I've met were pits. It's not the breed but the idiot who got the dog thinking it'd make him look tough. How you raise and treat the animal makes a huge impact.

−5

ENaC2 t1_j6dd1y7 wrote

It is absolutely the breed. You can assume that shitty owners are pretty equal across all other breeds, yet pit bulls are responsible for the most dog attacks in the US. 6x that of second place. Anyone repeating the misinformation that pit bull attacks are down to the owner entirely are a problem. They all have the potential to become dangerous.

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Wonderful_Formal6130 t1_j6dhuvh wrote

Thats solely in the U.S, yet pits are not just in the U.S. The American Pit is genetically screwed due to over breeding, which again falls on the owners. The animal itself was never the issue, greed and inbreeding for aesthetic purposes which caused health and mental defects is the issue.

−1

ENaC2 t1_j6dimqp wrote

Which pit bulls are fine then?

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Wonderful_Formal6130 t1_j6djfe7 wrote

You've clearly got a hate on for this animal. So this argument isn't getting anywhere.

Every dog breed is susceptible to the same issues pits are known for given time. There are dozens of defects within every breed that can be traced back to inbreeding, which is a human issue. Humans fucked the dog up is what I'm saying. Shitty owners and bad breeders. Your delusional to just simply blame the animal.

−3

ENaC2 t1_j6djtiw wrote

No. I love dogs. What I hate is people defending a dangerous breed that would make the world a better place if we let the lineage die out. Yes, other breeds can be aggressive but nowhere near as frequently. You are the delusional one here. If the breed goes away, they’ll get a different, safer breed and be just as happy and the toddler next door gets to keep its face.

2

Wonderful_Formal6130 t1_j6dl4fv wrote

Except that's been tried and failed. Idk where you live but I'm in Ontario. We've banned pits for nearly 20 years. They puts were just replaced with Dobermans, Rottweilers, Corso, etc.

The ban is now in the process of being over turned because there evidence to show that the breed itself isnt the issue. There are pitbulls currently for sale in my town, registered with the city and have been screened, etc. Just do your research and think logically about the issue.

1

ENaC2 t1_j6dmndu wrote

“Do your research”. The mantra of people who get their research from YouTube videos and word of mouth. Regardless of what you’re saying, it’s a problem in the USA and the breed there should be banned, but you disagreed and made a statement that the breed isn’t the problem. Also, if the ban is overturned in Canada, where do you think most of them are coming from? USA probably. Let the lineage end.

0

Corona716 t1_j6e29vs wrote

I'm guessing most of our "research" is dog experience amd not YouTube. I'm guessing differently for you. Mine is based in experience.

The "breed" is not the problem. Stop believing gossip you hear and listen to people who actually know what the heck they are talking about. You might learn something.

Like, for starters, did you know that "Pit Bull" is not a breed? It's actually a term that embraces a few different breeds. These dogs share similar characteristics, including High intelligence, trainability and ability to do damage (protect you) if needed. These attributes are what allow people to abuse them, train them to fight and make close-minded people think they are evil. They aren't. They are dogs. Nanny dogs in fact. Much more you could learn about them if you opened your mind and educated yourself.

−2

ENaC2 t1_j6e4igp wrote

Yeah, not like there are statistics or anything that give you more insight than personal experience. Sure, maybe calling it a breed in it’s self is a misnomer, but as a group they are a problem.

1

Corona716 t1_j6e7ozv wrote

They simply aren't. They are the most abused dogs in the the country. Ever met a person who was abused and later acted out? Should they be banned?? Trust me dear, I know dogs. You are just wrong. But since you seem to believe you know everything about how brains are wired, you must understand why yours is so small and hateful. I'm sorry if you've had a bad experience. Doesn't sound like it, seems you've just developed an opinion of disgust. To each their own. But don't encourage killing dogs you don't know. That's gross. They are God's creatures. Leave animals alone. All of them.

Your little chihuahua is actually more likely to bite than a pitty anyway. Actually

−2

Irisheyes1971 t1_j6fk7ev wrote

Educate yourself. Nanny dogs are a myth. Even the biggest pit bull support organizations have LONG agreed that this is completely untrue and there is no basis in fact for it whatsoever.

People like you are an embarrassment.

1

Corona716 t1_j6g6qiq wrote

Um no. You are wrong. Thus has been well documented for decades, if not centuries. Your hatred towards animals you don't know makes you an embarrassment and I'd even argue a bad person. It's breed racism and it's despicable. Shush and respect gods creatures.

1

GuyNCothal t1_j6eaatw wrote

I am only scared of Chihuahuas. I haven't found a pitbull that was mean

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LongjumpingBudget318 t1_j6fn0og wrote

We had a pug chihuahua mix.

It was a very affection ankle biting lapdog.

Once you sat down and it was on your lap you were safe

until then ...

1

Fyrentenemar t1_j6d4iuk wrote

There are also terrible breeders who don't give a crap about genetic weaknesses and deformities caused by inbreeding just for the sake of a dog's aesthetic.

2

Ok_Duck_9338 t1_j6fe91a wrote

Chinese crested are a suffering fake breed but ok for the allergy sufferers.

1

WhatKindOfADeal t1_j6b20zw wrote

A walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree. “You can’t cut me down,” the tree complains. “I’m a talking tree!” The man responds, “You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue.”

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archangel7134 t1_j6bm5t4 wrote

Anything you want to.

He still ain't coming to you.

Second favorite answer...Rollo

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piercedcleaver50 t1_j6as2bf wrote

The term ’labracadabrador’ is an amalgamation of the words ’Labrador’, ’Cadaver’ and ’Brave’. Most dogs die from performing high-level magic, because they don’t possess opposable thumbs. Thus, only brave dogs can be magicians and Labradors are known to be the bravest of dogs.

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SvordWulg t1_j6bf9wi wrote

What the actual flying flippity fuck did I just fucking read?

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KelCanada t1_j6b5dhq wrote

It should be spot.

6

Luke_low t1_j6bg8u5 wrote

'Marlboro', take it for a drag....

5

sand-man11 t1_j6aww3i wrote

What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming in the ocean “Bob”

4

agiro1086 t1_j6b354v wrote

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall?

>! Art !<

4

[deleted] t1_j6b6igx wrote

What do you call his arms and legs?

Pieces of Art

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OkDirector9518 t1_j6e6sj8 wrote

What do you call 2 guys with no legs hanging from a wall? Curt n' Rod

2

RoboSt1960 t1_j6bfeoq wrote

It doesn’t matter what you call it, it won’t come to you.

4

Angry_Dragon28 t1_j6b2f96 wrote

Doesn't matter, Call it whatever you want, it's not gonna come when you call its name.

3

DCeaster t1_j6atdku wrote

Sirius Black.

2

Jasonfunn200 t1_j6b2ibx wrote

Doesn't matter what you call him. He's not going to come

2

kiddsport t1_j6bbr4h wrote

You can call a dog with no legs but he won’t come.

2

StudentStock6029 t1_j6bdu8t wrote

Call him anything you want he ain’t coming lol

2

rockspiderme t1_j6bjbb8 wrote

You don't call it, because it will not come.

2

Jonah_Sebastian t1_j6btqel wrote

Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Right where you left it.

2

Ewetootwo t1_j6c7ot2 wrote

Dogfish. Finished now.

2

LeonidasVaarwater t1_j6cb7p9 wrote

Doesn't matter, he won't come when you call him anyway.

2

restrictedsquid t1_j6ci9mj wrote

I heard it: “What do you call a dog with no back legs?”

Sparkey

2

MrTheoUtlaw t1_j6cnxhw wrote

Efficiently sized pilot for Soviet space program.

2

Back2Oki t1_j6cp2v6 wrote

Sorry the answer we were looking for was seal, seal.

2

edgarsilvercreek t1_j6d9goc wrote

Cigarette, because every night you take him out for a drag

2

DABailey85 t1_j6egg3u wrote

A dog with no legs is a hotdog.

2

DaniDDL t1_j6etyqm wrote

“Why would you call a dog with no legs? It can’t come to you anyway” is how I heard the joke.

2

FunWeight2805 t1_j6euqt4 wrote

Anything you want, still won't come home.

2

flarezilla t1_j6j4mof wrote

Doesn't matter. He won't come to you anyway.

2

skaote t1_j6aylji wrote

Pound hound ?

1

Dickcheese-a1 t1_j6buge5 wrote

Every night the owner would it out for a drag.

1

JBYTuna t1_j6bzl5o wrote

Lump. Joe Cartoon says so.

1

Slickvath t1_j6ci8i2 wrote

Damn, you beat me. Lump, the no legged dog...

3

Ottos1 t1_j6c6ymn wrote

Poor dog!

1

66pig t1_j6cejow wrote

Anything you want hes not coming back

1

glenman1882 t1_j6chdsx wrote

Anything you want he'll not catch you

1

Hayley-DoS t1_j6chjx1 wrote

Nothing because it'll never come

1

GerManiac77 t1_j6chz3r wrote

When I was young we had a dog that had no legs. And he had no name.. For what? If you call him he would come neither.

This one just works in german. Was machst du mit nem Hund ohne Beine? (What do you do with a dog with no legs?)

Um die Häuser ziehen. (Draw around the Block. „Um die Häusern ziehen“ means to be out on the town in german)

1

renekissien t1_j6ckq3p wrote

What do you call a fly with no wings? - a go. What do you call a fly with no wings and legs? -a lie.

1

k_qnkr3004 t1_j6ctwiz wrote

I've never posted on reddit..and this is my first comment.

1

kaalki34 t1_j6d7jux wrote

You can call it,anything,you like. He/she ain't coming.

1

james--FranCO t1_j6dezrk wrote

Where can you find a dog without legs?

..

Right where you left it.

Alternative punchline:

Downhill

1

Drkindlycountryquack t1_j6di1pc wrote

What baseball position can you play with no arms or legs? Second base.

1

sanmanbx10 t1_j6dqkr9 wrote

Why call him anything? He can't come to you when you call him

1

Anthony_Gibson t1_j6e3m33 wrote

Anything you want to he/she still won't come to you

1

VRDAN t1_j6e4eco wrote

What do you call a dog with no hind legs and metal balls? -Sparky

1

eggroll85 t1_j6e4se1 wrote

If he has no legs and steel balls you can call him "Sparky"

1

ThirdI042 t1_j6epozl wrote

Doesn't matter what you call him. He's not gonna come when you call.

1

Brief_Pirate2111 t1_j6eq3rd wrote

I actually had to visualize a dog with no legs with its tongue out looking all happy, next to a log, and say yes I would call it a log

1

mazzotta70 t1_j6eq6q8 wrote

Call it whatever you want. It's not going to come to you.

1

Glad_Leave3920 t1_j6f0qtt wrote

Does anyone know how to change your name on here? I've been to settings, I've clicked the picture, reddit gave me this name idk how to change it.. I just started using it

1

Jewish_man24 t1_j6fc26j wrote

You can't

2

Glad_Leave3920 t1_j6fd2yh wrote

I don't understand how they picked my name, it looks like people picked their own names.... thank you for letting me know I've been going crazy trying to figure out how to change it

1

Famous-Example-8332 t1_j6ff6tj wrote

Doesn’t matter, it’s not going come when you call it.

1

Exciting-Variation41 t1_j6fmd2c wrote

No… the joke is what do you call a dog with no legs and balls of steel? Sparky…

1

M_Looka t1_j6fmtqm wrote

It doesn't matter because he won't come anyway...

1

My15yAcctLost4Voting t1_j6g0nmi wrote

What do you call a dog with no legs and brass balls

>!Sparky!<

1

Nuf-Said t1_j6gzkfa wrote

Doesn’t matter what you call him, he isn’t coming anyway. Same with a deaf dog.

1

unripenedboyparts t1_j6he63a wrote

But...log is dog with an l, which is like dog but crossed with the word leg. Log has more leg than dog does.

I don't know why my brain is trying to treat this joke like a word puzzle.

1

2manyfelines t1_j6iwg36 wrote

So mean, and yet I’m laughing. Take my upvote, you monster.

1

Layogenic_87 t1_j6j1j8w wrote

Doesn't matter, he can't come anyway

1

SlackerKey t1_j6ka7ck wrote

What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs, and over your neighbor's dog? What's great for a snack, And fits on your back? It's log, log, log

It's log, it's log, It's big, it's heavy, it's wood. It's log, it's log, it's better than bad, it's good."

Everyone wants a log You're gonna love it, log Come on and get your log Everyone needs a log log log log

1

Mamanfu t1_j6beo3o wrote

Ground beef. Oh wait 😯

0