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Kimchi-slap t1_ja77sv5 wrote

Pornhub is down, your picture will do.

110

ProETC t1_ja7pufa wrote

Please give me head so my nuts don’t turn blue!

11

mh-travelphotos t1_ja766mi wrote

.. I have five fingers and the middle one is for you.

56

OnJetways t1_ja78lw7 wrote

You finished too early

Like you always do

51

Edwin1070 t1_ja7ffcs wrote

I'm using my hand But I'm thinking of you

41

Notabot1305 t1_ja73ott wrote

Not finishing a joke sucks just like you

37

cunaylqt t1_ja77z1v wrote

I actually left this note for my boyfriend a couple of years ago, on vacation we had come back to the hotel after a particularly vwild night of drinking. Went to bed and sometime in the middle of the night he was either too trashed or was sleepwalking and "lost" the bathroom.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue. forget about jogging, cause you pissed in my shoe.

19

RJP2128 t1_ja7jpqh wrote

I've got a knife, get in the van

19

Desperate-Finance270 t1_ja76716 wrote

My c**k is both Let me stick it in you

12

ALeaf0nTh3Wind t1_ja7u2o9 wrote

As in both red and blue? ...you should get that checked by a medical professional.

9

Desperate-Finance270 t1_ja8jtyd wrote

It’s more like a rainbow to be honest… I keep telling to stop changing the colour of the lipstick but in vain

3

DolFinDude23 t1_ja83mzw wrote

He means painfully hard (red) and blue balled (I think)

1

Quillcy t1_ja7mhuo wrote

Poems are hard, so am I

11

[deleted] t1_ja76dyh wrote

I’m allergic to bullshit, ACHOO!

10

Nelac-Guile t1_ja7540k wrote

I dreamt I was binAry code when I had the flu

7

zharrt t1_ja7fm3n wrote

Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

Dating is hard,

Please send nudes

6

nonamesleft-- t1_ja7u6ql wrote

I agreed to record it, but didn't expect a crew.

6

jfq722 t1_ja7l5vf wrote

I have split personality disorder, and so do I.

5

snoppleinc t1_ja7ovgk wrote

C Vodka is cheaper than a dinner for 2

5

Ptoot t1_ja811tm wrote

Roses are red Violets are fine You be the six I'll be the nine

5

ketsueki82 t1_ja7rkb0 wrote

Roses are red, Cactus is thorny, Come to bed, Cause me so horny.

J/K aloevera much.

4

gilfromisrael t1_ja77gdy wrote

Half ass generation is counting on you.

2

bigjonny13 t1_ja7j6x9 wrote

Reposts are bad, and your joke is too

2

ravenousravers t1_ja7jmwn wrote

stick your cock in my arse and get aids too

2

Penniwhistle t1_ja80efh wrote

I have a knife, get in the van

2

MegaMinerd t1_ja81xu6 wrote

OP I know the comments are always funnier but you have to at least try.

2

OKRealtor t1_ja84vym wrote

....some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

2

hangdman1978 t1_ja8dysb wrote

How do you do, now bend over dude.

2

The-Friendly-Kraut t1_ja8e13u wrote

I am supposed to make a joke, But I don't have a clue.

2

FormCommercial4754 t1_ja8hwfh wrote

I don’t sleep at night bc I’m jerking off to you

2

Silent_Special_9024 t1_ja8ikda wrote

Aw, why man. I had like 3 other ones in my head but, now this. I'm stuck with it forever.

1

bigzahncup t1_ja75pz0 wrote

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Everyone else eats peanut butter

Except my grandmother

She drives a Buick.

1

Fun_Let_6140 t1_ja7b3fd wrote

I'm schizophrenic and so am I

1

drowned_beliefs t1_ja7cim1 wrote

You take the blue violet… the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red rose… you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.

1

Purple_Poetry_6674 t1_ja7dnst wrote

Roses are red, violets are blue, But Epstein didn't kill himself, it's true.

1

imdfantom t1_ja7pitd wrote

Only idiots finish this joke for you.

1

NDodma01 t1_ja7ta84 wrote

… Iris’s are peepo but what’s that to you (we all enjoy a flash of bloomers)

1

Nothalffast t1_ja7uyy3 wrote

Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn’t.

1

antistress1 t1_ja7v90n wrote

Roses are red, violets are blue, poetry is hard. Husky.

1

QueenRatigan t1_ja7vutc wrote

Mostly they're flat,

'Cause they're under my shoe.

1

drounds2 t1_ja7vvj3 wrote

I’m gonna barf, ‘cause you smell worse than my poo

1

BGDDisco t1_ja7yioe wrote

So are your lips, because I strangled you.

1

Hamerynn t1_ja7yipf wrote

I was born human, what happened to you?

1

69NutinCider69 t1_ja7z1wp wrote

Give me a blumpkin whilst I take a poo!

1

patcat21 t1_ja7z7z4 wrote

Enough poems come eat my ass too!

1

seroleg t1_ja853w3 wrote

Hi.
I am Hitler.
Nice to meet
You

1

Ruadhan2300 t1_ja87l33 wrote

Lemons are yellow, poems are hard.

1

cass3us t1_ja8as7z wrote

Pornhub is down, your moms Facebook will do

1

_atrocious_ t1_ja8baun wrote

..if i had a tomato, I'd throw it at you. (Actually wrote that to a valentine in elementary school.)

1

Response-Cheap t1_ja8can4 wrote

Did you know that envelopes use semen for glue?

1

audioinside t1_ja8dw3l wrote

Cliched poems are not jokes. Adieu

1

LegoCMFanatic t1_ja8hgui wrote

Roses are red

Violets are blue

This post is a lame joke

And OP, so are you

1

MaxKepler197 t1_ja8ja6d wrote

Sugar is sweet and so are you

The roses are wilted the violets are dead, the sugar bowls empty and so is your head

1

KronicDeath t1_ja8n7l7 wrote

Who is your daddy and what does he do

1

effigy22 t1_ja8rao0 wrote

I'm shit at poetry, show us your tits.

1

drumorgan t1_ja8t5y9 wrote

I'm not writing this joke
why don't you?

1

peeper_77 t1_ja8t7wv wrote

Some poems rhyme...and some don't

1

mdh431 t1_ja8uzla wrote

Roses are red

And it should be said

That violets are violet

Not fucking red.

1

DudeManDude__ t1_ja73bzt wrote

So are the walls and also my balls

0

markymadz t1_ja7487p wrote

You should really visit your gynecologist

0

Geoarbitrage t1_ja81rkw wrote

And I’m not doing work for you.

0