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dolly3900 t1_ja2g0zm wrote

Conversely,

What is better than roses on your piano?

Tulips on your organ.

😜

149

EXPLODODOG t1_ja3u39p wrote

I'll never forget when I saw Tom Waits in concert and he told that one!

15

dolly3900 t1_ja3udt3 wrote

It's one that the idiot in every one of us knows will never get unfunny

8

cherryhilljawnz t1_ja5a1os wrote

I'll never forget going over this girl's house; I asked her what she wanted to do...she said let's play tulips. Even though I heard this joke before it didn't register but she quickly explained she wanted to put her two lips on my organ

She was not a looker

7

dgm42 t1_ja3rj12 wrote

What is the difference between an Angel and a prostitute?
The Angel spreads her wings and gets a harp.
The prostitute spreads her legs and gets an organ.

11

LJBoogersocks t1_ja570ew wrote

Or:

What’s worse than a dead skunk in your piano?

A diseased beaver on your organ.

6

Abides1948 t1_ja38sef wrote

Rock lobster is excellent

2

7_overpowered_clox t1_ja2p86l wrote

I don't get it

1

quotidian_nightmare t1_ja2z7g1 wrote

Organ is slang for penis. In this context, crabs are pubic lice.

The joke is saying that while it might be annoying (and weird) to have literal lobsters on your piano, it's worse to have pubic lice.

2

ChaseShiny t1_ja3oldb wrote

The lobster playing the piano better than you ever will

1

Ogfrebu83 t1_ja3u7dq wrote

And better than me too.

But I won't compare organ playing.

−1

dwsam t1_ja4eu84 wrote

You think you had it bad? I had the loobster!

1

228P t1_ja5e0xj wrote

What's better than daisies on your piano?

Tulips on your organ.

1

Atlanar t1_ja5nrfh wrote

Cancer in your organs.

1

FrReEsEpDeOcMt t1_ja61i9u wrote

I remember that as what’s better then a rose on a piano. Tulips on your organ

1

Guitar_Strang006 t1_ja84w57 wrote

Are we talking about an upright piano or organ? I just avoid clams. Lobsters can be taken care of with a pot of boiling water but don't use that for crabs!

1

jadmcgregor t1_ja8qze1 wrote

First dirty joke I ever heard… got of the bus in kindergarten and asked my parents if they wanted to hear a funny joke I heard on the bus… they said no… I asked: What’s worse than a sick elephant sitting on your piano?? A diseased beaver sitting on your organ!!! Then I got to say: see I told you it was funny!!!

1

mrSunshine-_ t1_ja41iv0 wrote

Thou shalt not crab on thy organ

0

Changingchains t1_ja69mz5 wrote

Chechen and Chong conflating two commercials in the 70’s:

FDS if he kisses you once will he kiss you again ?

0

MisterB78 t1_ja3ey0e wrote

What’s worse than a lobster on your nuts?

Two lobsters on your nuts.

−1

DoctaDookie t1_ja3md4o wrote

A lobster on 2 pianos!

−1

ErenYeager850 t1_ja3pzqs wrote

What does a pianist do? He AIDS your organ

−2

StillStealingJokes t1_ja2f9nw wrote

Booooo

*Throws tomatos

−5

Metall3x OP t1_ja2utr7 wrote

That's fair.

That's more than fair.

2

Trollizard476 t1_ja2h17q wrote

Fuck you

−8

Trollizard476 t1_ja36ayq wrote

Sorry

1

averinix t1_ja3d3ey wrote

You're not allowed to apologize for trolling when "troll" is in your name lol. Sincerely, please make better life decisions. This world needs more positivity! If you're gonna troll, make it count. Or be part of the solution. Your choice bud.

2