Viewing a single comment thread. View all comments

Waiting-For-October OP t1_je6rxsf wrote

Reply to comment by Preposterous_punk in LPT: When someone is mean to you, it’s 100% about them and their ego, and 0% about you. They are just miserable with their own life and want you to feel bad about yourself as well. Just kill them with kindness and remember that you are better off and not a miserable person like them. by Waiting-For-October

That isn’t what I meant though. Those examples aren’t mean though. I mean like back handed compliments, passive aggressiveness etc

0

Preposterous_punk t1_je6tnm6 wrote

That’s why a one-size-fits-all tip doesn’t work, though. “Mean” is not a clear enough term. I think a lot of people would view someone saying “I think you’re unattractive and I don’t want you around me, leave me alone!” as mean. And sometimes it is mean, and a bizarre response to someone asking to be handed a napkin. Sometimes it is a reasonable and desperate reaction to unacceptable behavior. Same with the other examples. But if someone walks into a room and says “a girl just said I’m ugly and shouldn’t come near her,” and people respond with “OMG how mean! That’s about her, not you!” the person is going to continue on acting in appropriately and feeling sure they’re not the problem.

3

[deleted] t1_je6to8w wrote

[deleted]

1

Waiting-For-October OP t1_je6tz05 wrote

Yea I could probably edit it to remind people what “mean” actually is, but at this point it’s pointless since I realize posting in this sub attracts too many abusive psychos so I’m just gonna forget about it.Thanks for the input though.

0