LPT: if you’re trick or treating with a child with food allergies, bring your own candy!

Submitted by 99badwolfbaloons t3_ycbn1d in LifeProTips

I buy candy and small Halloween toys for my three year old who has a bunch of food allergies. Before he walks up to the house, I walk up and discreetly give my candy or toy (little spider rings, slime, etc.) to the owner, saying ‘would you mind handing this to the little boy there when he walks up? He has food allergies’. They’re always happy to do so!

My son gets to experience trick or treating just like other children and is not disappointed. And it doesn’t put the burden on our neighbors to provide allergy friendly treats. And honestly, even if someone had treats that were typically safe for him, I wouldn’t feel comfortable accepting food that isn’t individually labeled anyway. This will be our third year doing this and so far it has been a big success!

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raederle-of-an t1_itlg2cq wrote

We did a buy back with our little one. We let him trick-or-treat with friends, collecting the candy. When we regrouped back at the house, we separated what he could have and what he couldn’t. We taught him to give away what he couldn’t have but we replaced it ourselves with what he could have.

When he was older, he decided to not take what he couldn’t have which sometimes resulted in a neighbor grabbing a different treat he could have.

Edit Out / our

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itlimjq wrote

I like the idea of him doing a buy back at some point! We actually did something similar to that with his sister where she sat out the candy and it was switched for a toy just so she wouldn’t have so much candy. He seems to have gotten a bit more sensitive lately though so I don’t like the idea of him putting his hand into the bowl with other candy and touching allergens. But I would love for him to be able to hunt around for a starburst one day!

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notacooldad t1_itm7lm6 wrote

We would do a candy swap with the group of kids after trick or treat, swapping out allergens for safe candy. In the end we would act as a bank and swap all the un-exchanged candy for her favorites.

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Spartancoolcody t1_itmqvr9 wrote

Maybe his costume could also include gloves?

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itmrd63 wrote

Totally could, but the thing to be aware of is that if your hands are in/around your mouth, then your gloves are too! For little kids it doesn’t help a whole lot, although for older children, gloves is an extra excellent option when dealing with foods they can’t have. For example, my son has eczema as well (often accompanies food allergies). And when he’s a little older some of the stuff that’s too harsh on his hands now will probably be the type of thing he can handle with gloves on (specifically like scented play dough and scented sands.)

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ChannelingWhiteLight t1_itocfwn wrote

This is what I did. After Halloween, my kids traded inappropriate candies for something out of Mommy’s Golden Bag of Treats! The treats might be edible or other goodies. Then we donated the remaining candy to our local Boys & Girls Club.

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dhas19 t1_itmddw8 wrote

Wow, my parents did that for me back in the day and I thought it was genius. I never really felt like I missed out on much, so it works

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dfreinc t1_itlhclo wrote

my kid just wants to hang out at the halloween party instead of trick or treating this year. he's only 8. loves all the decorations and stuff though so i'm just going to let him enjoy hanging around and handing out candy with the adults outside i guess.

he's got an egg allergy and braces. so no eggs or gummy/sticky/chewy things. essentially no candy. before he had braces, he had other allergies. he pauses before he eats anything new and asks what's in it. been like that since he could talk. 😂

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itlj1sc wrote

Allergies AND braces! That’s a tough combo for candy!!

Ours asks ‘billy food?’ Or ‘Gaga food?’ (That’s what he calls his sister) since he was around two. So he’s definitely figuring it out! We’re lucky that so far we’ve found a pretty close food for everything he can’t have -except for pizza really.

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the_cardfather t1_itmkous wrote

I like that. My daughter is a type 1 diabetic. She went trick or treating. At a closed event this year And she picked out maybe 20 of her favorite candies to ration over the course of a week. She'll get more and do the same thing but then she just gives the rest to her brothers.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itmmszg wrote

I’m glad she still gets to participate! People who are lucky enough to not have to worry about safely doing regular kid stuff can’t imagine how good it feels when your kid who needs a little extra care is able to experience something that healthy kids get to do all the time!

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DJBeckyBecs t1_itlhkhf wrote

Small rant, not a real comment about the LPT… I used to nanny a family that had their 5 & 8 year olds on a weird diet; it wasn’t prescribed or necessary, they chose to do so. Their kids never have or will experience trick or treat. At Christmas time the 5’s teacher gave the class tiny candy canes and dad freaked out. The kid freaked out because they didn’t get to do what their friends could and dad just couldn’t wrap his mind around that. The parents frantically ordered a pack of wacky ones online that were like $6 per candy - with full intention of giving each child a piece of one and then squirreling the rest away because the kids couldn’t actually have candy.

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dramaaaaa t1_itnozzy wrote

That’s so sad.

I mean, my sister and brother in law are total health nuts. They only buy organic, don’t keep junk food in the house, make sure the kids drink mostly water all day and eat home cooked meals but that doesn’t stop them from letting my niece and nephew eat a piece of candy their teacher might give them or the occasional McDonald’s.

You can raise your kids healthy without ostracizing them.

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DJBeckyBecs t1_itnq56g wrote

Dude, they didn’t even do it to be healthy, at least not conventional healthy. They didn’t have a microwave because of how the micro-waves affect your food. In my uneducated opinion, their diet was not good? Their primary food source was organic bacon or unseasoned baked hamburger, they were paleo. Anywhooooo, I hope the kiddos are able to expand their diet to something more “normal” soon.

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dramaaaaa t1_itnu0jh wrote

As an adult who’s done multiple diets, paleo is something I simply won’t touch. There’s no way to get all your needed vitamins and minerals and also it’s just stupid lol

Poor kid, I hope the same

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justinrcasey t1_itlo6pd wrote

Check out the teal pumpkin project. People will put out teal pumpkin indicating they have non food gifts or allergy friendly candy. We do this every year since my wife has food allergies.

https://www.foodallergy.org/our-initiatives/awareness-campaigns/living-teal/teal-pumpkin-project

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Sakurako2686 t1_itmddxh wrote

Thank you for sharing this!! I have been wondering what to do for people in my neighborhood that may have allergies. Truthfully I never thought about it until this year...its my 3rd year passing out candy and the thought of someone not being able to participate because of an allergy makes me sad.

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Cissycat12 t1_itnmldm wrote

Thanks for posting! My son outgrew his allergies, but I still supply fun stickers, pencils, and other non-food items for kids that need them as well as put out my teal pumpkin and sign.

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Ready-Interview-9809 t1_itnnr0b wrote

Yes! I have a teal plastic pumpkin and always have glow sticks, boxes of Halloween temporary tattoos, etc (in years past) for kids. This year I bought glowing Halloween rings for the kids. It’s nice to have an alternative

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all4whatnot t1_itmbfvc wrote

Both of my kids have had to deal with this when they were younger. We'd let them trick or treat like normal. Then the "Halloween Fairy" would have something special (and small - not Christmas) for them - usually safe candy and a small gift. It sucks their life can't be normal like every other kid and we have to avoid many normal things. But this gave them the chance to trick or treat like other kids.

We'd give their trick or treat candy away to neighbor kids.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itmd1m9 wrote

That’s sweet though! I might do that when he’s a little bigger and can understand the swap is coming.

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katievspredator t1_itmdzf5 wrote

This year my bf and I bought a lot of little party favors and toys to give out to kids along with candy. Wal Mart had a bunch of party favors for cheap (plastic witch fingers, spider rings, stretchy skeletons, etc) and we also bought 100 glow sticks on Amazon. Kids love glow sticks and it makes them easier to see when they walk the neighborhood

My favorite thing we got to hand out this year is Pokemon Halloween BOOster Packs. They're little individual mystery packs of Pokemon cards with a Halloween theme

It's fun to get creative with it

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itmmxh9 wrote

This is so sweet!! I’m sure it’s appreciated by the parents too!

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PunkNDisorderlyGamer t1_itm3fbh wrote

You could just trick or treat and then swap out the bag of candy once you get to the house? I feel like this would get burdensome, especially in my neighborhood we have many different cultures and nationalities that aren’t really English speakers, I couldn’t even attempt to explain to every house the food allergy situation.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itm75et wrote

We have some non native English speakers in our neighborhood as well and it’s never been an issue! Usually I just smile, give them a price of candy and say it is for this little boy (who’s standing with his dad at the end of the drive way). Everyone has understood and is happy to give it to him and he’s so happy to get it too! And the response from our community has always been really positive because they see the work we put in to make sure he gets to experience trick or treating like the other kids.

As far as picking through the candy something he can have, you have to keep a couple things in mind. One, it isn’t safe for him to be touching candy wrappers that might have nuts, dairy, or other allergens. And two, it wouldn’t be safe to give him candy that isn’t individually labeled. So for example, if amount the tootsie rolls are some starbursts, I wouldn’t feel comfortable with him rooting around for the starburst and touching the chocolate in the process. And then, even though in the past he’s been able to have starbursts, I wouldn’t give him one without reading the label (which is on the big bag, not the individual pieces). You would be absolutely shocked by how often we encounter ingredients that are different from one month to the next, or different for different sizes, or made in different facilities, etc. Better safe than sorry!!

And while we’re a little less on guard in our own home, out in the neighborhood, away from our vehicle, is not the time to experience a life threatening allergic reaction! We carry medicine with us, but it’s still nerve wracking with a small child.

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Dinnerpancakes t1_itmjd8r wrote

Why don’t you just take the whole bag from him and give him the stuff he can eat? Yeah he might get upset you’re taking it, but you can make him wash his hands before any candy or something and swap it out when he’s out of the room.

There are numerous places where you can donate the candy. I know they used to collect candy at my local city hall and send it to soldiers overseas.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itmmion wrote

Unfortunately, even touching the candy can cause an allergic reaction (usually hives). So there’s no point in him touching the candy and taking it only for it to be swapped later; it’s really just an unnecessary risk.

Now every person is different and some are more sensitive and some are less, and every allergy is different even. He could pick up a wheat cracker and not have any problem at all (wheat allergy), but if he touched anything with dairy, nuts, or soy, he would likely break out in hives.

Also, older kids are easier to work with on this stuff. My son turned three a few weeks ago, so we’re still in the hands on the face, around the mouth phase. Just not worth the risk of him having allergens on his hands.

But this tip is really for parents with kids who have food allergies. They know how severe the allergy is, and for some who would avoid the holiday altogether because of a severe allergy, this is one way their kid can participate.

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jellyn7 t1_itnrolc wrote

We always provide non-food items, but we do stick it in the same container as the candy. I'll keep that in mind for next time!

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Dinnerpancakes t1_itmndr2 wrote

Why is he touching the candy? You hold your bag open and people drop candy in. If you replace the bag he won’t be touching any.

He could also wear a costume that requires gloves in case he HAS to touch something. That would also make the you need to wash your hands a reality, not just something to get him out of the room.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itmsv4b wrote

Some people just offer the bucket for the kid to grab from. I think it’s about 50/50 in our neighborhood.

But aside from that, people have a REALLY difficult time understanding the kind of precautions needed when navigating a food allergy. It’s the kind of thing you don’t really understand until you, or in my case my baby, will live or could die based on how well that you understand what needs done. (An aside here, that parents know how sensitive their child is and how severe the allergy is, so no shaming here for parents who tolerate more exposure than I do!)

So pretend for a second that it isn’t candy, but instead is something else a child can’t have like loose adult Tylenol! You probably wouldn’t want your two year old or three year old walking around with a bag of loose Tylenol. Because god forbid they put one in their mouth! And that panic you would feel if you saw your baby holding an open container of adult Tylenol is how I would feel finding my son with his hand in a bag full of tootsie rolls!

Now you might really trust that you’ve taught your child not to put a pill in their mouth, and someday it’s going to be up to them to act in a safe way without you there. But three is not the age you would trust them to carry some pills around the neighborhood in the dark when it’s busy and it only takes one to cause a big big problem.

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avanross t1_itnek2z wrote

As a kid with severe allergies to all nuts, at the end of the night we’d all spread our candy on the floor and i’d just trade all the candy i couldnt eat with my friends I had went out with. As far back as when i was like 6, my parents would just double check my candy bag when i was very young.

Seemed like a pretty obvious solution to kid me

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BarkingBagel t1_itnij1d wrote

A really cool local dj has a child with an egg allergy. She said that the "Switch Witch" comes to her house Halloween night after the kids go to bed and switches out the unsafe candy. I thought that was adorable.

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kharjou t1_itn5qpp wrote

Not efficient at all my man. You pay all the candy.

Get him his favorite candies. Let him collect no eating before we get home. Then swap the collected with your safe candies.

This way you paid the candies but you get to eat all the collected ones

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dhas19 t1_itmd4iy wrote

I mean, it works. When I was younger, we just sorted out all the nut free stuff we could keep, and my parents got extra to replace what we had to get rid of.

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galwegian t1_itmn7ax wrote

unless that food allergy is shellfish. could get messy ;-)

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Vroomped t1_itmpeme wrote

Or like my parents with my sister (nut allergy), swap an identical bucket as soon as we got home. Nobody's the wiser and parents are free to graze on ancient forbidden delicacy.

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BlackWidow1414 t1_itnldfc wrote

I keep a teal pumpkin on my porch, and a separate bowl of candy that is devoid of many, if not most, of the most common food allergies.

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Bsmith0799 t1_itnpew4 wrote

This year and last year I have a selection of YumEarth stuff I've been giving out at the trunk or treat me and my service dog are volunteering at 🙂 its free from the top 8 allergens, made in a dedicated facility, and I advertised for weeks ahead of time that I had it available as well as a poster at the event. It's individually labeled with ingredients on it too.

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1angrypanda t1_itnuxn7 wrote

This is why as a child free person I always have allergen free candy and non food items. I like Halloween and as a former sick kid, I don’t want them to feel left out.

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parinaud t1_ito0p66 wrote

Question - I typically buy some non-candy treats (stamps, bubbles, slap bracelet type things) and put it in our bowl that we offer. The candy we hand out is prepackaged stuff like snickers, starburst. Based on some of your responses, that wouldn’t be allowed? Because they are mixed?

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mommadragon72 t1_ittbqxz wrote

Best bet for kiddos with really major life threatening allergies is too keep it away from the candy. Till you live with someone who can die ( or even just react with hives or horrible stomach issues) it seems crazy but after you've lived it it's totally reasonable. ...... People don't think of things like cross contamination from wrappers very often bc for most of us it would never be an issue...... The other issue with things like nut allergies is the more times you use an epi pen the higher the chance one won't work. The last time we used my epi pen we hit me with it, called 911, used a second epi pen bc the first wasn't working and the medics have me more in the ambulance. Scccaaarrrryyy!!!

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LittleOrangeCat t1_itovo85 wrote

I buy stickers as well as candy, and let kids pick what they want. They can have both, if they like. If they're little, I'll talk to their parents and let them know which candy is nut free, if they need that. I try to make sure I have an assortment of candy, some chocolate, some non-chocolate, some without nuts.

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FunTooter t1_itmraut wrote

My kid is into the Switch Witch now - as she can’t eat 99% of the stuff given out. She just collects the goodies for the Switch Witch to trade in.

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YamiKokennin t1_itn6ymh wrote

With how common food allergy is, my family usually have chocolate, non chocolate, pretzel, gummy, and a variety of hard candies. I had years when there were kids with chocolate allergy or certain food dye allergy. Feel really bad for them.

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Aggrosaurus2042 t1_ito12r2 wrote

We have small toys to hand out with Candy this year. We are just going to have bowls to separate candy, toys and chocolate and tell each kid to pick 2 or whatever. This way if a kid has an allergy they can pick what they can have and not be disappointed

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HauntingHarmonie t1_itm50yh wrote

I just hand out stickers and such... no need for this. It's not a burden to be inclusive. Two bowls... one candy and one stickers. Not complicated.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itm602g wrote

There are definitely some houses that do this and it’s always nice to see!! Most don’t though. Being tapped into the food allergy community because of my son, this is the time of year I start seeing people urging their communities to offer allergy friendly treats. Personally, I like to have my own as a backup, and when a family says they have stickers or something, I thank them and he comes out picks from what they have (which is more fun for him for sure!) But having our own treats is a good way of insuring a toddler has a great night with lots of fun memories with his sister, and doesn’t get frustrated by a lack of options if there aren’t any for him.

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MJogola t1_itnmdv5 wrote

Seems like a lot of work, I'd just let him eat the candy, and if he gets sick its natural selection

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942man t1_itpmjz2 wrote

How can you discreetly walk up to the house, knock on the door and give the owner the same candy the child is about to receive telling them why when the kid is literally right there with you. Stupid and unpractical tip.

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Unusual_Lemon_2453 t1_itl8779 wrote

Your neighbors probably think you are a giant weirdo. What you need to do is let your kid collect the candy like a normal child, and teach him to pick out the candy that is nut free, the rest he puts in with the candy to give away to trick or treaters. Being able to deffirintiate the foods and candies that wont make him sick is a lesson he needs to learn in life. You will not always be there to cuddle him, and when he starts school, he needs to know not to eat that peanut chew sussie snuck in her backpack.

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justwantsomezen t1_itl9jg1 wrote

The child is three. As they get older your plan is wonderful but not for a three year old.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itla7ao wrote

Absolutely. And even at three he has a developing understanding of ‘safe’ and ‘unsafe’ foods for him. But it is very hard for people to understand who don’t deal with it, you absolutely have to read the label. You can never give a kid with allergies unlabeled foods, even if they’ve had the food before. Halloween candy is usually not individually labeled, which is why we buy our own.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itl9qyz wrote

Sure, knowing how to differentiate between safe and unsafe foods is important to teach a child with allergies. You certainly cannot do that before you’re old enough to read food labels though. And Halloween candy is usually not individually labeled anyway, it’s sold in large bags, with the ingredients listed on the larger bag, but not on the individual pieces of candy. Plus, even something typically safe, becomes unsafe if it is served in a large bowl of other allergy containing treats.

Also, how do you propose that a two or three year old pick candy out in the first place? It’s not like he can stick his hand in the bowl of foods he’s allergic to.

Also, I think you mean coddle and not cuddle. ‘Coddle’ means to treat in an indulgent or overprotective way. To be overprotective you have to be protecting the child in a way that is excessive or unnecessary given the situation. Since a child with food allergies can die from coming in contact with their allergen, and since a three year old cannot read for themselves, it is not overprotective to provide them with allergy friendly foods until they have the skills and maturity to pick out their own foods.

And lastly one of the absolute worst things you can do for a child with food allergies is train them to eat familiar looking foods or go off of the picture or look of the food since similar foods can have different ingredients and even the same food processed in different facilities can have different ingredients. You want to teach them instead to never accept food that was not given to them by a trusted adult who knows their allergies.

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Ghost-Toof t1_itlacrw wrote

Father of a boy with peanut tree nut and egg allergies. Nice to see others with ideas. Thanks for that. Daniel tigers allergy is peaches and rubble from law patrol is allergic to peanuts like our boy. Also helps to find shows with characters with similar allergies. For us at least. 3.5 year old says. I'm allergic to peanuts like ruble. It's awesome.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itlbylj wrote

We actually just watched that Daniel Tiger episode with him! Our little guy has a whole bunch of allergies at the moment (hoping he grows out of at least a couple!). But we’re so lucky that he’s an incredibly good eater and up for anything when it comes to food. It makes it a lot easier find foods for him knowing he’s easy to make happy!

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Ghost-Toof t1_itledwh wrote

Our boy picked up a Hershey almonds bar at the grocery store a few weeks back. Said. Hey buddy you gotta put that back. He pointed at the almond and say. I allergic? And put it back. It made me so happy, proud and relieved that he's on a start to the right path.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itlf6av wrote

Yay! It feels good when they understand and don’t seem like they’re feeling are hurt by it. :) He turned three a couple weeks ago and he has the language now to talk about it more.

There’s one niche store that sells special bread he can have and we make a whole trip out of going and shopping for special foods he can have (usually sauces and stuff to dress up chicken/veggies/ rice). He loves it! And he tells everyone in the store he’s there for ‘billy bread!’

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Remarkable_Story9843 t1_itlxc4y wrote

As an adult dx celiac this makes me so happy!

(And is also why I never take the last of a gf item on the shelf. )

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