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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itm75et wrote

We have some non native English speakers in our neighborhood as well and it’s never been an issue! Usually I just smile, give them a price of candy and say it is for this little boy (who’s standing with his dad at the end of the drive way). Everyone has understood and is happy to give it to him and he’s so happy to get it too! And the response from our community has always been really positive because they see the work we put in to make sure he gets to experience trick or treating like the other kids.

As far as picking through the candy something he can have, you have to keep a couple things in mind. One, it isn’t safe for him to be touching candy wrappers that might have nuts, dairy, or other allergens. And two, it wouldn’t be safe to give him candy that isn’t individually labeled. So for example, if amount the tootsie rolls are some starbursts, I wouldn’t feel comfortable with him rooting around for the starburst and touching the chocolate in the process. And then, even though in the past he’s been able to have starbursts, I wouldn’t give him one without reading the label (which is on the big bag, not the individual pieces). You would be absolutely shocked by how often we encounter ingredients that are different from one month to the next, or different for different sizes, or made in different facilities, etc. Better safe than sorry!!

And while we’re a little less on guard in our own home, out in the neighborhood, away from our vehicle, is not the time to experience a life threatening allergic reaction! We carry medicine with us, but it’s still nerve wracking with a small child.

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Dinnerpancakes t1_itmjd8r wrote

Why don’t you just take the whole bag from him and give him the stuff he can eat? Yeah he might get upset you’re taking it, but you can make him wash his hands before any candy or something and swap it out when he’s out of the room.

There are numerous places where you can donate the candy. I know they used to collect candy at my local city hall and send it to soldiers overseas.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itmmion wrote

Unfortunately, even touching the candy can cause an allergic reaction (usually hives). So there’s no point in him touching the candy and taking it only for it to be swapped later; it’s really just an unnecessary risk.

Now every person is different and some are more sensitive and some are less, and every allergy is different even. He could pick up a wheat cracker and not have any problem at all (wheat allergy), but if he touched anything with dairy, nuts, or soy, he would likely break out in hives.

Also, older kids are easier to work with on this stuff. My son turned three a few weeks ago, so we’re still in the hands on the face, around the mouth phase. Just not worth the risk of him having allergens on his hands.

But this tip is really for parents with kids who have food allergies. They know how severe the allergy is, and for some who would avoid the holiday altogether because of a severe allergy, this is one way their kid can participate.

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jellyn7 t1_itnrolc wrote

We always provide non-food items, but we do stick it in the same container as the candy. I'll keep that in mind for next time!

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Dinnerpancakes t1_itmndr2 wrote

Why is he touching the candy? You hold your bag open and people drop candy in. If you replace the bag he won’t be touching any.

He could also wear a costume that requires gloves in case he HAS to touch something. That would also make the you need to wash your hands a reality, not just something to get him out of the room.

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99badwolfbaloons OP t1_itmsv4b wrote

Some people just offer the bucket for the kid to grab from. I think it’s about 50/50 in our neighborhood.

But aside from that, people have a REALLY difficult time understanding the kind of precautions needed when navigating a food allergy. It’s the kind of thing you don’t really understand until you, or in my case my baby, will live or could die based on how well that you understand what needs done. (An aside here, that parents know how sensitive their child is and how severe the allergy is, so no shaming here for parents who tolerate more exposure than I do!)

So pretend for a second that it isn’t candy, but instead is something else a child can’t have like loose adult Tylenol! You probably wouldn’t want your two year old or three year old walking around with a bag of loose Tylenol. Because god forbid they put one in their mouth! And that panic you would feel if you saw your baby holding an open container of adult Tylenol is how I would feel finding my son with his hand in a bag full of tootsie rolls!

Now you might really trust that you’ve taught your child not to put a pill in their mouth, and someday it’s going to be up to them to act in a safe way without you there. But three is not the age you would trust them to carry some pills around the neighborhood in the dark when it’s busy and it only takes one to cause a big big problem.

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