LPT request. How to politely tell someone I don't wish to hang out with him?

Submitted by prophylaxitive t3_yhanxm in LifeProTips

I play squash once a fortnight with a guy and afterwards we have a beer and play pool for an hour. He's recently suggested we do other stuff and I just don't want to. There's never any conversation about anything other than squash or pool. These things are all we have in common! (He suggested an escape room, which I turned down flat because I don't like them, but he's just called me on the phone to suggest a murder mystery weekend with our respective girlfriends. I said I'd ask her, to buy myself some time.)

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keepthetips t1_iucqvym wrote

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Deathboy17 t1_iucqz94 wrote

My general excuse is lack of money/time.

If not, its because Im busy with other plans or commitments.

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WEugeneSmith t1_iucsc0n wrote

This is a hard one. You can simply say, "M schedule is really busy, but I am usually (or always, if this is the truth) open for squash and pool"

It is up to you to set boundaries. Eventually, he will accept them.

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Scary_School_202 t1_iucviuz wrote

You can simply say the truth that when it comes to your time and energy for hanging out with other people all you want to do is squash and pool. Tell him you like the way things are...that it is comfortable and dependable and you don’t feel nice about changing it up. I think honesty is far more respectful than lying to him to spare his feelings.

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Frost_Butt t1_iudwg0r wrote

You’re an adult (I assume).... so act like one.

“Hey I really enjoyed our time out the other night but I don’t feel we really have much in common and I don’t really like _____”

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prophylaxitive OP t1_iuecnwd wrote

Replying to Frost_Butt (#347,814)

As an adult, I feel making the kind of remark you suggest would, at best, make our squash and pool nights - which I enjoy - awkward and, at worst, jeopardise them altogether, whilst potentially hurting his feelings which I very much want to avoid. Thanks for your input, though.

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Vortamock t1_iued3v2 wrote

You can tell him straight up without being mean. Just be like "hey bud, no offense but I don't really want to hang out with you."

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slave2GROOV t1_iuflzr1 wrote

Be honest. You never have to remember the truth

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