Comments
YellowOnline t1_iuixcag wrote
Get away from these people.
throwaway2727737 OP t1_iuiz9z7 wrote
yes i do, unfortunately they are my relatives the amount of hate they have for me is unbelievable & it sometimes pains me the people i liked before have turned out like this
dlongwing t1_iujd545 wrote
In these situations, the best thing to do is to cut off contact with them. You're not obligated to endure abuse, even from members of your immediate family.
If these are more distant relatives who only show up around holidays, then it's time to tell your family that you're not coming home for Thanksgiving (or whatever).
If you're living at home, it's time to make a plan to GET OUT. Secure enough financial resources to move out of that house. If you're under-aged, then you can make a plan you can execute on as soon as you're 18.
lordpin3appl3s t1_iujn6h6 wrote
One of my buddies told me a while ago to never accept criticism from someone you wouldn't accept advice from. Ask yourself - does this person know you well enough for their words to actually carry weight? If not, they're likely projecting or have things going on in their own lives. Being more involved with myself and getting to know me better has helped me maintain my security in who I am when people say nasty and untrue things about me.
IncompetentFrog t1_iuj0dqj wrote
Find out why you care, it’s gonna be different for you.
Dissect that reason like a bucket of frogs in a 9th grade biology class.
Once dissected you’ll understand the flaw in your reasoning and will be able to overcome it.
kenlasalle t1_iuiwui5 wrote
Sadly, lots and lots of practice.
throwaway2727737 OP t1_iuizevq wrote
trying my best to make myself believe their words don’t matter but at some point, it hurts me
kenlasalle t1_iujrekj wrote
Yep. And it will until you decide that it won't. It takes a long time. I know. But it can be done.
I wish you the best.
NyJosh t1_iuiydxd wrote
Cut them off. They aren’t your friends. Find new social circles away from people like that.
throwaway2727737 OP t1_iuizi7e wrote
true they are mostly my relatives & i will stay away from them
Varys_Beauty t1_iujvh1d wrote
Ok. They’re your relatives. You can’t distance yourself or don’t want to. Doesn’t matter. I have a relative I have distanced myself from as much as possible, however, I do still have to interact at times. She will say shitty things. I used to get mad and she’s follow up with ‘it’s just how I am!’
But now I stop. Stay silent for 5ish seconds and then say, ‘did you really think that was ok to say out loud?’ I am telling you she thinks twice about it now.
OrangeBlood1971 t1_iuj7zi5 wrote
The real question is, should you actually care about their opinion?
You seem to know that what they're saying isn't true, so you know it just doesn't apply to you and they're wrong. Just as if they called you a jelly donut...it's a silly thing for them to say because it does not reflect reality. In such a case, treat them as they deserve to be treated - ignored for being nonsensical. You don't have to fix them or their opinions. Let them sit there in their own ignorance/nonsense.
And, if they treat you this way, then why should you assign any kind of value to their opinion of you. By extension - a low opinion of you coming from someone whom you don't have enough regard for to value their advice is just an opinion to ignore.
SubGothius t1_iujca3b wrote
Indeed, and what people say about us isn't much of any reflection on us; it's more a reflection on them. It's none of our business what other people think of us; we have no direct control over what they think or say, so it's not our responsibility to be concerned about it, only how we decide to respond to it, if at all.
Quinquilharia t1_iuji1in wrote
Only accept insults from people you respect
D-Le-P t1_iuj1swk wrote
Oh I don’t stay unbothered, I stand up for myself these days.
slarti54 t1_iuj2y63 wrote
We'll all be dead soon enough.
Never_Shout_in_a_Zoo t1_iujexdq wrote
Learn some dark psychology and become their karma.
Furifufu t1_iujliw9 wrote
Just desensitize yourself, that's what I did
D0ctorL t1_iuk0tur wrote
I have this same problem, but with a co-worker. I don't want to leave the workplace because the money is really good and the hours are very consistent, but I'm sick of being treated like I am. The things they say to me linger in my brain all day. They live rent free in my head.
keepthetips t1_iuiwego wrote
Hello and welcome to r/LifeProTips!
Please help us decide if this post is a good fit for the subreddit by up or downvoting this comment.
If you think that this is great advice to improve your life, please upvote. If you think this doesn't help you in any way, please downvote. If you don't care, leave it for the others to decide.
NegotiationSuitable6 t1_iuizd4n wrote
Laugh at them and start gaslighting them alienate them show em how you feel.
DoctaMario t1_iuj12ao wrote
Feel like we need more info here
[deleted] t1_iuj3tfj wrote
[removed]
ngamboire t1_iujczc6 wrote
When you reach the end of your tether and tell yourself IDGAF. Use it as your mantra. Then use your time, effort and energy focusing on anything and everything else, so you're not preoccupied with them. You'll outgrow them, move on from them, become indifferent towards them and they'll HATE it. Best revenge
quardlepleen t1_iujku1u wrote
Stop associating with them. Period.
sikmode t1_iuizj46 wrote
Hurt em back. Especially and even more so if they are family.
OddNefariousness1967 t1_iuj5va8 wrote
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” - Eleanor Roosevelt