I'm sorry for your loss, all of it, and every single thing. As someone who lost a lot, am essentially homeless, you can't deal with it all at once, it's to overwhelming, try to deal with it one thing at a time, and that's what it takes, time. Time to grief, time to change perspective, time to accept.

It sounds like you are used to being independent, it's not a loss of that, to ask for help, especially where you don't have time, like the possibility of becoming homeless in the near future. It's a strength, to have people that can help.

The things you write that doesn't help, it's complicated, i can go in details if you like, so you know why, and how to make them work.