I agree. As adults, most of us have lost people we care about. Unless it was recent, I don't expect anybody to assume I'm still grieving over a loss. If there's something about that person I want somebody else to know, I'll come out and tell them.

I lost my grandmother, who I loved dearly, two months ago. I don't expect anybody to feign sympathy or ask questions about her. She was 90, it didn't exactly come out of nowhere.

Exactly. People say some really cruel stuff, inadvertently, trying to fix it.