brbqqueen t1_j6lf5ud wrote on January 31, 2023 at 3:44 AM

I wonder what would happen if you all cheered him on? Whenever he says he’s doing something poorly or wrong in response “Are you serious man? You got this! Keep going! You can do it!”

He is talking himself into it when he talks down to himself. It sounds like he thinks that way or he just wants to be uplifted?

I totally understand how it can be frustrating and exhausting. If you feel it inside you to talk to him then do what you feel is right. It might be what he needs. If he is really down about himself then I’d recommend doing it kindly. How would you want to be talked too?

badcatmal t1_j6lhy1l wrote on January 31, 2023 at 4:07 AM

Overtaking him with love would be fun. I wish I could see the progress he would make if he was riddled with positivity. After laughing and being grossed out, he may break.

swishphish1 OP t1_j6ls03a wrote on January 31, 2023 at 5:42 AM

I’m glad to see that you have such a positive outlook. Maybe I should’ve said this in the original post, but I really think this guy is a narcissist. If not that, then highly egotistical.

swishphish1 OP t1_j6lrbf6 wrote on January 31, 2023 at 5:35 AM

I appreciate your concern for him, and I don’t want to sound like I’m blowing off your advice, but we have tried that with no success. I’ve offered to try and help with his technique/strategy, but he just blows me off and falls back into the same “I suck” mentality.

I guess I’m asking for more confrontational advice, because trying to change his outlook hasn’t worked. I think he really needs to hear how it affects others. Any thoughts on that question? Thanks again btw

brbqqueen t1_j6mjzvb wrote on January 31, 2023 at 11:49 AM

No no it’s okay! Being in the situation you know more about what’s going on. I have definitely met people like that. And it is a different rodeo. I appreciate you enlightening me!

I think you are right. He does need to know!

I have a parent who is a narcissist/egotistical. And sometimes it’s an endless battle. With my situation at least. Do what feels right and especially for your mental health. Just know when to choose your sanity.

I wish you luck and hope everything works out!