LPT REQUEST How not to give up on things?

Submitted by Magegi t3_10oje75 in LifeProTips

I have low self-esteem and I'm slow learner. I'm that guy who slows the board game night because I don't get the rules. Others learn them almost immediately. But that is just one example, this fits to many situations.

I give up very fast when trying to learn something new because it takes time, and it feels like I don't learn anything. I'm 33 and I feel like at this rate I should go to kindergarten if I want to keep up.

I know it takes lot of repeating to learn (some take more time than others) but what to do if you lose hope almost instantly? Thank you in advance.

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keepthetips t1_j6ey1ca wrote

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Fun_Amount3063 t1_j6eyzd9 wrote

What was school like for you? It's possible that you have an undiagnosed disability if it seems like you learn things slower than your peers.

As far as self-esteem goes, no one can teach you that. It's something you have to learn on your own. Therapy is the best tool to help you through it.

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spudfish83 t1_j6eze4m wrote

Hello!

There are many people who share the same tendencies, you're not alone with this!

May I suggest you look at some online questionnaires around mental health? You may gain some deeper insight into what's happening. It might be worth trying to talk to a health professional, they may be able to point you in the direction strategies and ways to help you learn faster in new ways.

Best of luck!

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themanyfaceasian t1_j6ezh2y wrote

Set small goals and objectives that you can easily check off one by one. Most times we set such high standards for ourselves when learning something new. When i wanted to learn guitar i decided to learn one song and master that instead of learning all the chords or like three songs at once. It made it fun and learned the nuances of guitar slowly.

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Psychological_Lab954 t1_j6ezmo1 wrote

play online and practice. stick to similar games and develop strategies and tactics. and know the difference between strategy and tatics

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WiseChoices t1_j6f4miw wrote

Find what you are good at and do that.

We need the service people of the world more than we need CEOs.

People need help. Find a way to help them. It can be very satisfying.

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BubbaCringe t1_j6f5bdr wrote

Always do your best at everything you do. Once that becomes your standard kick it up a notch and do even better, then make it the standard, rinse and repeat. Don't worry about what you can and can't do, don't spend time feeling bad for yourself. Just do what you can do and do it to the best that you can do one day at a time.

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Michayl20 t1_j6f5snm wrote

look into Dr Hubermanm, mostly brain Neuroplasticity which effects you're ability to learn

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CheesyGarlicPasta t1_j6fqi6c wrote

Don’t set time frames for your goals, you will get there when you get there, just keep practicing, just set the time to practice or work on it. I find that if I set a time frame for learning something I f I don’t make it in time I give up where if the goal is just getting there I don’t, I just keep pointing myself in the right direction and working on it and get there eventually.

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VoltaicVoltaire t1_j6fsv8i wrote

This will sound crude but: Fuck Everyone Else! People have strong points and weak ones and nobody is perfect. Society values certain traits more at certain times throughout history.

There are very smart people who care more about money than they do about preserving our planet, just as an example. You think the CEO of ExonMobil thinks he is a cool smart guy? You bet he does and he is killing all of us, including his kids and grandkids. I don’t think he is very cool.

Go your own pace, smell the flowers, enjoy what makes you happy and fuck everyone else.

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SpencerBristol t1_j6gttaz wrote

Don't compare yourself to others. You can only compare yourself to yourself. Be patient with yourself, and don't set deadlines or specific goals. If you're having trouble feeling motivated, you don't have to do anything, you get to do something. Start by doing one small thing each day to improve from where you are today. Whenever you think of tasks in front of you, frame it as "I get to do this today." Acknowledge your human physiology. You learn better mid-morning after a good night's sleep. There's no such thing as a night owl, it's just a broken sleep cycle; be asleep by 10 PM. There is nothing wrong with masturbation, but without enough physical activity, it can drain your body of the reward chemicals your brain uses to tell you when you've done a good job. If you do this you will see the work become its own reward. Your brain will dump dopamine when you reach a new realization and that will motivate you to keep going and pull you back when you've been away.

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glassdoorknob75 t1_j6heucz wrote

Don't be afraid to take a break! And feel absolutely free to come back to anything whenever you want. (Getting organized about it is the other task that needs to be addressed seperately, but I find keeping detailed notes that work with your brain can often cover that, and it should not require worrying about.)

I'm a on-and-off learner myself and I think it matters the most we don't make our quits final. It's not like with relationship responsibilities or subscriptions or medication where it's troublesome to go on-and-off.

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