LPT Request: how to be the stern in my position

Submitted by Public_Reindeer5049 t3_10nniti in LifeProTips

So, for some background, I’m the human version of a rug. I get super upset if I upset someone and I just don’t like delivering bad news. Lately, it’s been effecting my work.

I work in an apartment complex and have two specific issues where this stands out. The first issue is telling people that we’re denying their application due to such and such. We’re very corporate here, so it should be easy for me to tell them “your credit came back bad so for that reason, we cannot continue with your application”. I get so nervous at the thought of someone reacting poorly, I avoid this at all costs. I usually push the issue onto my assistant manager and she’ll handle it. The second issue is we have a ton of kids here. A lot of the time, we need to reprimand them since they come into the clubhouse and act unruly or they’re simply here without a parent/ lease holder present. Again, it should be easy for me to tell them “you need an adult present with you to be in here”, but the thought of a child/teenager throwing a tantrum about it makes me nervous enough to not do it at all.

I’m a leasing consultant here and most days I have both my managers with me and they handle it, but I mostly work Saturdays by myself and run into these issues.

How do I grow a backbone and become stern?

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keepthetips t1_j69q80h wrote

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huggarn t1_j69vsfw wrote

practice makes perfect. You're afraid of stuff that never happend ( presumably, just like 95 % of fears that people have )

Even if somebody reacts poorly, your answer will not change. You do not care nor can do anything about it. Just keep calm and repeat your answer.

Did I mention that practice makes perfect?

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CaroteneCommander t1_j69xmpi wrote

You don’t have to hang out for someone’s bad reaction. All you have to say is that they were denied based on credit and direct them to the procedure to request a copy of their credit report (which is legally all you’d ever need to say) and do this on a loop.

I worked at a hotel, and pretty much all you need to do with unruly kids is look them in the eye and say “out” while pointing at the door, until they leave. If you know who the parents are, you can send nasty grams until it stops - unsupervised children in common areas is usually against the lease.

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Bruno_the_Dog t1_j6bji0y wrote

Make it about the process/rules, not them. “The application was denied due to a low credit score”, “people under the age of xx are not allowed in the clubhouse”. In life, avoid you statements, it’s quite helpful in my situations.

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BeBackInASchmeck t1_j6dnlu9 wrote

Not all jobs are for everyone. The first thing you need to decide is if this is the right job for you. It's very different to be stern with a coworker or vendor than it is with a client. I'm very stern with my coworkers and vendors, and justify it by "doing what's best for the company", but I don't ever want to interface with clients. I hate upsetting or disappointing them, and I would not feel happy at such a job.

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