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Gajatu t1_ja473bx wrote

It is not crossing a line to tell his parents that their son is a deadbeat. They probably already know that.

As for advice, if you're really insane, learn linux system administration and virtualization. It's not easy by any stretch, but linux and it's virtualization tools are free and the virtualization skills are transferable.

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[deleted] OP t1_ja48fsn wrote

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shanefking t1_ja4d1g8 wrote

If I had a son that started a family and then abandoned them, I would want to know.

I’ve seen this be a pattern of behavior, my friend’s dad had done that at least 4 different times, and he is still finding “new” siblings.

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[deleted] OP t1_ja4di6g wrote

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shanefking t1_ja4l4h6 wrote

I mean, it takes two people, and you certainly didn’t do it all by yourself.

I’m not sure, maybe send an email and include a picture of the two of you together, just so they know its real? I’d also tell them something like “I’m not asking for anything from you, I just want you to know. Here is my information if you would like to get in contact in the future.”

But theres a lot of cultural context that I don’t know, that could affect how it would be interpreted

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romadea t1_ja4o4ui wrote

If he would disagree, he would be absolutely wrong, though? Your child is owed support from their father, morally if not legally (I don’t know where you live, but I don’t think there are many countries where he wouldn’t be required to provide for his child.) If he doesn’t want to be in their life, financial support is the bare minimum he can do. He played a 50% role in creating a human being, he doesn’t get to just walk away from the situation.

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