We have all done things that we feel ashamed of and wish we could take back. I’ll say getting and staying sober, for me, meant really focusing on the present and the future. When I find myself thinking of the past, the painful parts, I do some deep breathing and focus in on the here and now. We can’t take back what we did, and honestly it’s part of who you are and where you are so there is some value to all that experience and knowledge of where we don’t want to be again. Good luck, don’t be so hard on yourself.