The fact that you acknowledge your bad choices and feel badly about them shows you are an emotionally healthy human being. That you have a conscience. So take those cringe moments as a positive. The best thing you can do for yourself and for others is to move forward with your life, keep building on the good things your embracing. And try to remember that so many of us have done things we aren’t proud of. “To err is human, to forgive divine” - Alexander Pope