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grimmowl t1_je9rifz wrote

So housing is going to be the toughest aspect of your move. Neither renting or owning is cheap nor easy as we have a serious crunch. Probably the biggest change will be having access to a coast but to be fair i don't know Kansas from the price of eggs in china. We have fewer bigots but not zero and some of the areas of the state that are most affordable could feel like they are every where.


Lady_Grey1993 t1_je9rulh wrote

I see.

I feared the housing situation was gonna be the toughest.

Ugh. Why is it that the states most accepting of queer people tend to be the most expensive, and the most affordable states tend to be hostile???


Doc_coletti t1_je9txho wrote

Hey just so you don’t get your hopes up, queer people still have it rough in many rural parts of Maine. Not trying to keep you out but just want you to have a realistic idea. Trans people in particular would not want to live in my town, for instance. It would be quite tough for them.

Portland and other bigger towns and cities are very accepting though.


the_paruretic t1_je9vlj2 wrote

Yeah, it's not the most accepting state you are looking for, it's urban vs rural. Every state has urban areas that are more accepting of queer people, and every rural area in the country is less accepting of that. Maine isn't by far the most accepting state as it is almost entirely rural.


DifficultyConnect557 t1_jea3sun wrote

Try networking online in the queer community in and around Portland, maybe someone can find you a roommate or offer good advice on what's like for them around here. I live south of Portland and for the most part tolerance is common, I relocated from Florida which oddly has a very large gay community which isn't tolerated. It's sad that people that are not Christian have such a hard time living happily. Good luck. If not Maine, Rhode island might be a place to look into as well


FITM-K t1_jeaebdi wrote

> Why is it that the states most accepting of queer people tend to be the most expensive, and the most affordable states tend to be hostile???

Because accepting states are more enjoyable places to live. Sadly, this is likely to get worse as the Christian cultists take stronger hold over many red state governments and pass laws that affect queer people, women, and minorities.... you're far from the only person in a state like that right now thinking "I need to get the fuck out of here."


petrified_eel4615 t1_je9u385 wrote

Expect that your pay will be about the same (or less, Maine is stingy for education professionals) but your housing costs will be double or more.


Sufficient_Risk1684 t1_je9yy8z wrote

Probably worse unless you open an in home childcare place. Most places pay barely above minimum wage.


floralwhale t1_je9xry3 wrote

I grew up in Texas and moved here a couple years ago after spending a few years in Denver (which I couldn't afford). I'd never even been to Maine or New England before moving here. Happy to answer any questions you have! The nature is plentiful, and basically the entire state is rural. It would be a stretch to even call Portland a city, but the great thing is that it functions like a city in terms of amenities. The ocean is beautiful, and the mountains aren't hard to get to either. Plenty of hiking all around the state. Winters are long but not as cold as many parts of the US.

Like others have said, rent will be higher but your wages will also be higher. Not enough to totally offset the higher cost of living, but I anticipate that as long as you're ok with having a roommate you'll be ok. As an ex-Texan, I'd say the relief of knowing the government isn't out to get me and my friends is very much worth the higher cost. I'll pay for peace and freedom. Maine is also the least religious state, which I'm sure you came across in your research.

I am speaking to the Portland area. I wouldn't recommend you go too far outside of Portland, given your reasons for leaving Kansas. However, I can say that conservatism in Maine is very different (less Christian) than you're used to. Can still be Trumpy though.


siebzy t1_je9ryao wrote

Housing market sucks ass but we could certainly use more early childhood educators

Culturally you'll get along fine. Maine has a small-town culture where people get by how they can, help each other out, and mostly leave people alone to live their lives. It's not too different from what I've seen in the rural Midwest, just with trees and hills instead of corn.

Edit: we also have our share of backwards-ass bigots but for the most part they aren't as loud or aggressive as in Kansas and they don't have any power in the legislature (at least for now)


ScarletFire21 t1_je9u1ea wrote

Housing is egregiously expensive because of the Boston and NYC areas slowly spreading into smaller town zones in the Northern New England states. Specifically in Maine, lots of wages don’t match up to what housing costs and opportunities for career growth are much fewer than in a more populated area. Kansas and Maine are both places to settle and drop anchor, but much tougher if you’re looking to cultivate a new and improved beginning. Unless you luck out and find a job that earns you more than 50k per year, I wouldn’t move here.


MathematicianGlum880 t1_je9v2yh wrote

I know many gay people who live in Massachusetts. Not trying to deter you from here, but maybe the housing is better.


MabusIncarnate t1_je9x5qe wrote

I wish things didn't have to be this way, best of luck to you in finding a more comfortable and accepting place to live.


Seyword t1_je9tnj2 wrote

What’s your income level? Housing prices have doubled for the most part over the last 3 years. So an average $200K home now goes for $400K+.

Southern Maine is the more diverse/accepting area of the state but it’s also the most expensive. Most of the jobs are found here.

1-bedroom apartments are now going for $1500+ in the Portland area (our largest city).


Lady_Grey1993 t1_je9tyjn wrote

Around 20k per year.

I wish I made more, but early childhood teachers don't make shit. 😕


Seyword t1_je9v5qw wrote

Is that full time? Almost everyday job over here pays $20 an hour. Do you have a teaching degree?


Lady_Grey1993 t1_je9vc6u wrote

Full-time, ye.


floralwhale t1_je9x8i4 wrote

You could probably get a job at Walgreens here that pays $20 per hour. So I would expect to make slightly more than you do currently, but obviously rent will also be higher.


svengoalie t1_jea5qqj wrote

Southern Maine and New Hampshire are not cheap, but maybe there are some sweet spots to maximize acceptance and minimize cost as you move in from the coast. The Berwicks, Sanford, apartments in Dover/Durham NH.

Echoing others, we are not a socially liberal utopia, but there are large swaths of Maine that will be OK.

(Grew up in Maine, family still in Maine, moving back in a few years for retirement).


FITM-K t1_jeae167 wrote

I don't know why this post is downvoted. As a queer person myself I completely understand your motivations and I support the idea.

> What is the housing market up there like?

It's fucked, but less fucked the further you get from Portland. IDK how it compares to Kansas, but it's probably worse. Just do some browsing on Zillow (or whatever site) in areas you're interested in.

The challenge here is that the cheaper areas are also more rural, which also generally means less queer-friendly. Southern Maine and up the midcoast you'll see pride flags everywhere (including the churches) but it's a different story up north and in the west.

> Is it better to rent or own?

Always better to own, but tough to afford depending on location. And of course interest rates right now suck, but that's true everywhere...

> What places are there to visit and things to do? (I'm a nature lover and big cities never interested me anyway).

If you like being out in nature, Maine is a great spot to be. I think most folks who live here have some kind of hobby that gets them outdoors. Where you should go depends on what you like to do (and where you live), but there's really nowhere in Maine that's far from outdoor recreation opportunities.

> How would you recommend a Kansan like me adjust to the Maine lifestyle?

A few things to be aware of:

  1. You need to find some reason to be excited about winter/snow. Skiing, snowshoeing, snowmo, ice fishing, fatbiking... it can be whatever, but it's good to have something or the winter is LONG and depressing.
  2. Mainers are generally nice and accepting in a way, but don't expect a warm welcome... or any welcome at all, really. Folks generally keep to themselves, so you will need to go out of your way to integrate yourself into the community, meet people through activities, etc. If you don't, it can be really isolating. It's a weird culture though -- if you need help and people see it, random strangers will absolutely stop to help you. But at the same time you can move into a new place and not a single neighbor will come say hi, or wave.
  3. Per point 2, Maine doesn't have really have a big/organized queer community. There are some gay/LGBTQ-friendly bars in Portland and other spots as well, but it's not comparable to what you'd find in larger cities, in case that matters to you. And again, the further you get from Portland, the less visible queer community there's gonna be.