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nitrohigito t1_iu692kr wrote

That's one remarkably disgusting shower thought if I've ever heard one.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6e277 wrote

I think it’s beautiful. And if it helps people grieve and cope then it is a good thought.

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nitrohigito t1_iu6e7xd wrote

Yes, the exact thought of people finding it interesting or appealing at all (let alone beautiful) is the most disturbing part. Utter insanity.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6fddk wrote

Have you spent much time with those who have the disease? I work on many units that specialize in it and the grief I see on both sides is the disturbing part to me. If we can take any of that agony away, we should.

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nitrohigito t1_iu6g919 wrote

I have had a close relative with Alzheimers, so yes. So for some people to come and suggest that "this is just their reincarnation taking over bro" is just beyond distasteful. Conning people into thinking it in the name of relief isn't something I can agree with either.

Redefining reality doesn't change it, and it's basically the single most disrespectful thing one can do against those who suffer the effects.

It's an awful process - and I despise when people rob others from living even that through, when they've already been robbed of living anything else.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6gse0 wrote

That all sounds like you find the concept of religion disrespectful as it says our currently reality it not everything - and I don’t disagree, as a person never raised in religion. But belief is different from religion, it’s hope. We hope for more

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nitrohigito t1_iu6hnqe wrote

I wasn't particularly addressing religion, though that is indeed (partially) how I feel about it. But rather than (false) hope, I'd prefer either actual options were given (good quality palliative care(*) / euthanasia / quality time spent together), or nothing at all. Hoping in vain is like rubbing salt into a wound.

(*) Of course, this is all very subjective, and in the real world, especially if the patient or the family is religious / follows spiritualist philosophies, this will not be the correct approach. But I hope it was clear this was just me being opinionated throughout.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6j1aq wrote

As a palliative nurse (I float to locked behavioural and dementia units) I find belief and religion strongest at this time of life. It helps people grieve. I see it constantly. Logic really doesn’t matter at a time like this, I find the “most logical ones” are often the most lost. Working on this setting has only strengthened my beliefs. (Note this is all my personal experience)

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nitrohigito t1_iu6k2dd wrote

Within the framework of "improving the patient's quality of life to the end" that makes sense. But then I'd say it's pretty justified to feel absolutely in shambles / lost when half the time you're out of it, you know that, and slowly but surely you're nearing death with each passing day.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6ltbv wrote

What do you mean by out of it half the time? Many are not confused as death nears. I have coherent conversations with people who pass within hours all the time.this is different from straight dementia

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nitrohigito t1_iu6m0os wrote

I meant it mentally, was thinking about my family member who passed away from Alzheimers. He was visibly not present most of the time, less and less over time.

Could work different for dementia patients, thought the effects were similar.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6p466 wrote

Oh sorry for my misunderstanding

When a person is dying of dementia and not some other cause, they are not out of it half the time. The dementia takes memory, then mobility, then fine motor control, then speech, and finally swallowing - usually in that order. When they are in the active dying phase of dementia it’s like they are just a body. But often another cause will take them first, such as infection or choking.

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llluka0103 t1_iu6hfmd wrote

But if people believe in it then what's the problem? If you don't believe in it cool, but that's like getting upset at a Christian for saying their loved one goes to heaven after they die. I'm not religious myself but I'm not gonna shit on other people's beliefs if in reality it's not hurting anyone. And if people who believe in reincarnation actually believe this is how it works then that's like their "religion". If you don't believe in it then just go away?

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nitrohigito t1_iu6i5cj wrote

> But if people believe in it then what's the problem?

Nothing. Go ahead and I'll be mortified on the sidelines hearing about it, maybe make further comments on it in another thread if you ever make it into the news with it.

> If you don't believe in it then just go away?

Am I not allowed to find thoughts posted here disturbing or something? Who are you to tell me to not express that? Why would expressing that be invalid? I'm not obligated to respect people who I find absolutely loony, that's courtesy. Courtesy I don't always find appealing to give.

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llluka0103 t1_iu7317y wrote

You're allowed to express your opinion but there's no need to be a dick about jfc. You ever heard of the word "ignore"? Especially if you can say that it's not causing problems, then you're literally just going out of your way to say your opinion and be mean about it. And if you're allowed to express your opinion on disagreeing then I can do the exact same thing to you, I'm just glad I'm not an ass about it when I do. And quite frankly you sound like a miserable person to be around if all you do is express your opinion in the most distasteful way. I can't imagine ignoring something you don't like takes more energy then to go out of your way to be mean about it just because you want to.

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nitrohigito t1_iu75tgb wrote

> You're allowed to express your opinion but there's no need to be a dick about jfc. You ever heard of the word "ignore"? Especially if you can say that it's not causing problems, then you're literally just going out of your way to say your opinion and be mean about it.

No, I didn't. I didn't bring up religion until you and the other person pressed on, I didn't elaborate on my opinion until I was explicitly asked to, and if you think

> I'm just glad I'm not an ass about it when I do

you're not only being dishonest to me, but to yourself as well.

> I can't imagine ignoring something you don't like takes more energy then to go out of your way to be mean about it

Considering I didn't go out of my way, and the extent I "didn't like this thing" was quite severe, yes, it would have absolutely been more effort. By your logic, you could have "just ignored" what I wrote, I would have been justified telling you to "just go away", and it would have apparently been far easier for you to do so than typing out two massive comments about how miserable you find me.

The absolute hypocrisy you're putting on display is incredible. Go do some soul searching before picking fights with people who you're absolutely in no way superior to, thank you very much.

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