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TheAceofHearth t1_ityjome wrote

We judge others by their actions, and ourselves by our intentions.


Yuna__707 t1_itz8fiv wrote

To be fair…. We don’t know their intentions (or whether they’re genuine), and usually they have a justification or a certain mindset of how the things they do are justified but it doesn’t apply the same way in the perspective of others..

Judging anyone other than ourselves based on intention isn’t always accurate since we won’t quite understand what others think and whether or not it’s genuine.


Gwanosh t1_itzip8l wrote

To be fair, most people can't or won't honestly analyze their own intentions most of the time


Yuna__707 t1_itzj23j wrote

We’d like to believe we analyse it even if it is rather one sided. It’s not like anyone else is a better judge of anyone else’s intent since we all view it in our own ways..


Gwanosh t1_itzk6hs wrote

I would argue someone who knows you well and is comfortable and close enough with/to you can make you realize intentions you didn't realize you had at times. Whether directly by seing them where you fail to or indirectly by giving you a different perspective.


Yuna__707 t1_itzkr7l wrote

It’s not unbiased either tho, they likely have their own prejudices and are likely have similar views to their friend as close friends often have similar beliefs and perspectives.

Also they may try compromise in sharing their views harshly to spare their friendship.


Gwanosh t1_itzm84p wrote

While all true, it doesn't invalidate that the reverse happens. We could argue percentages but it's ultimately futile.

I would generally agree that you're a better judge of your own intentions than others, but I would suggest that being open to the possibility that you misread your own intentions is critical to being better. My only observation, empirically, is that I see too many people either maliciously misrepresent their intentions or fail to perceive them. There's another pointless percentage discussion which is how often my own perception is wrong.


Yuna__707 t1_itznt9w wrote

While you’re entirely right that our own perception of our intentions may be conceited or overlooked.

At the same time, other’s perception of our intentions aren’t necessarily unbiased and likely have their own prejudices and intentions.

It’s good to be open to other’s perspectives and the possibility of intentions being misinterpreted or misguided, failing to understand the inherent prejudices of others around you and viewing opinions as objective over subjective may further misguide your intent..


doogle_126 t1_iu1vn4a wrote

And best to gather data from more then one person. Remember, if you about your day and meet and asshole, he's an asshole. If you go about your day and everyone is an asshole, you're the asshole.

We don't get to decide what society thinks of us. We can follow all the rules and still get slandered and ostracized.


CrosseyedBilly t1_itzoagv wrote

Yea but judging yourself based on intention and not action is just being biased.


Yuna__707 t1_itzouwv wrote

Why is action more biased than intention? Perspective of the causation or result of an action can be viewed differently. Some may say the action was helpful but others may entirely disagree, the same action provides for different reactions and views, isn’t it just as biased as the evaluation of intentions?


xxtoejamfootballxx t1_iu0fgqf wrote

It’s biased because you are using different criteria for yourself vs others…


Yuna__707 t1_iu0rcz4 wrote

In this case I’m not arguing against the idea that people judge themselves differently in comparison to others, yeah it’s likely true in general

But I’m saying that judging based on action is just as biased as intention, while a different basis for judgment is just as biased


CrosseyedBilly t1_iu0osg1 wrote

I said the opposite also, basing how good of a person you are based on your intentions, not your outcome is biased.


AdhesiveBullWhip t1_iu2f1mt wrote

Yeah that’s exactly what the guy above you said without all the unnecessary rambling.


solace1234 t1_iu1v7gy wrote

“They recognize intention only when they find themselves at fault” - Happiest Kid in the World (me)


Rotunda89 t1_ityez7t wrote

Most of societys problems derive from people

Fixed that for you


oedipism_for_one t1_iu18wrn wrote

Every system is perfect until humans get involved


Rotunda89 t1_iu73ybz wrote

The concept of perfect would not exist until after humans, though.


smileymn t1_itygunl wrote

I’d say in some cases holding people as to the same standard they hold of themselves, only to be perpetually disappointed.


mlusas t1_itymva6 wrote

Or holding yourself to a higher standard than you expect from others, resulting in additional stress and effort.


Clumsy-Samurai t1_itz02pw wrote

Or do both like me and be ultra disappointed in the human species! Yay!


Scatterbrained247365 OP t1_iu29vej wrote

Definitely feel this sentiment can coexist with the original statement. I gave up on other people a long time ago.


efernst t1_ityr7pv wrote

I don't think so. Lots of people often hold themselves to higher standards than other people, causing them to burn out etc. Probably the main cause of depression I'd say.


SwiftasShadows t1_iu10f0n wrote

I was gonna say this. I feel like everyone else's attention is just a spotlight on my inferiority. I seek way too much approval.


Otfd t1_iu0o1j4 wrote

Yeah but a lot of people are capable of doing both at the same time..


TeamMossyNet t1_iu07eld wrote

Or because of too much praise/scolding as a child, or media, the person has a skewed view of what people in general should be capable of, and hold themselves AND others to unrealistically high, or self-destructively low standands


Chkiken t1_itydzic wrote

It seems like this post is generated by someone whose own problems derive from society.

Edit: response to post


HeadDoctorJ t1_ityno83 wrote

Problems with society largely have to do with the way society is organized, how resources are allocated, and what behaviors are reinforced. Society impacts the individual so much more than the individual impacts society.


caduceushugs t1_ityr2jt wrote

Most society’s problems derive from the massive inequality in the distribution of basic needs, like education, housing, food and the dignity of being able to control the means of how we spend our time day to day when our basic needs have been met and we feel like we can contribute to the society in a way we find meaningful.

But yeah, blame sick, poor and exhausted people…


Scatterbrained247365 OP t1_iu2bchd wrote

I hear what you’re saying. I didn’t put any examples mainly to see how people would interpret what I said in their own way. That said, I think that the overpaid (CEOs, presidents, regional managers) hold the (including their own) lowest paid workers to higher standards than themselves, but they potentially don’t even know it. “I pulled myself up by my bootstraps, and so can you.” Failing to think that maybe these workers are in a cycle of poverty, and that these “bootstraps” were actually comprised of their parents fully funding their college education and then daddy’s friends getting them their first job.


CarlJustCarl t1_itzttw4 wrote

Huh? How is this feeding the poor and providing shelter to the homeless?


bunnyswan t1_itz4am0 wrote

In my little part of the world it seems like most people hold them self to a higher standard than they would others...


GrilledDisease t1_itzkdws wrote

You're right but the opposite I think is more true. People remove standards and justify their behaviors by looking at those "lesser" than themselves like criminals. "Well I'm not a bad person because ..."


DMurBOOBS-I-Dare-You t1_iu03ikk wrote

Most of society's problems derive from a seemingly severe allergy to identifying, acknowledging and owning personal accountability.


Scatterbrained247365 OP t1_iu2bpdq wrote

This is deep. Completely agree.

Parents blaming their child’s poor academics/behavioral problems on teachers comes to mind.


modulev t1_iu05s6x wrote

Most of society's problems come from people having kids when they shouldn't, IMO.


[deleted] t1_iu0beru wrote

Most of society's problems stem from people telling others what to do.


Revanur t1_itzg21u wrote

Marcus Aurelius said always be stricter with yourself and forgiving of others.


Fun_Presentation4889 t1_itzqze3 wrote

Or just immaturity, in the case of good people who do bad things all the time but just don’t mean to…and then feel guilty but do it again because they don’t know how to change.


mem269 t1_iu05p1t wrote

Well it's understandable when I do it, I've been going through some shit. But everyone else needs to get it together.


Dizavid t1_iu0bbm3 wrote

Though funny enough, we also hold each other to higher standards than we do our gods. Just try doing 10% of the crap gods do, of ANY religion really, and you'd be in jail. For life in many cases. You'd also be the most notorious offender of crimes against humanity. But when our gods do it we find it "beautiful".


lostmonkey70 t1_iu0fpov wrote

We generally judge ourselves on higher standards. We just internalize the loathing when we fail or forgive ourselves much easier than others when they do.


kloudrunner t1_iu0ghai wrote


That's the main problem with society. Top to bottom greed.


Virtual_Ad3616 t1_iu0h6ku wrote

Disagree, Greed is the root cause, especially when it dismisses social responsibility-something that is supposed to be integral to leadership in a Nation such as ours; Moral Hazard etc, all that basic Business 101 stuff. Our Country is run by unchecked greed.


bitspacemike t1_iu0lcxy wrote

I’d expect this type of low effort post from me but not from you dawg!


Scout78604 t1_iu0lhj6 wrote

I thought this while driving the one if someone makes a mistake in front of us, we're all quick to cuss out the other driver (even if it's silently in your head) but the second you make an error you'll be like "I'm just trying my best."


Slick234 t1_iu0mrd0 wrote

I think most of society’s problems just stem in general from human idiocy and inability to apply rational thinking strategies to big problems. We’re emotional creatures and don’t like data, we like anecdotes.


iwasstaringthrough t1_iu0nlqu wrote

I disagree!!

I think it’s like this: We hold people to the impossible standards we set for ourselves, a standard we will never reach, and since we are constantly punishing ourselves for not meeting it we’re in a bad mood and feel hatred when we see other people not meeting it, especially if they seem happy not meeting it, because they remind us of our great and humiliating shortcoming.


Gordon_Explosion t1_iu0qvyd wrote

Nah, most of society's problems are from about half the population being scum.


Sorry_Im_Trying t1_iu0regs wrote

Personally felt it was because of a complete lack of integrity.

It's just gone. Everyone is just out for themselves.


AlreadyTaken2109 t1_iu0s9sb wrote

Why do you point out the speck in your brother's eye but ignore the log in your eye?


Theguywiththeface11 t1_iu0shyx wrote

“Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye.”


Lasshandra2 t1_iu0srxj wrote

Hey I’d never do that. I’m painfully aware that lots of people are doing the bare minimum. I’m always doing stuff they are supposed to do.

It’s infuriating.


Complex_Werewolf5576 t1_iu0vu2g wrote

I'd just say the people that have been in power have fucked things up. It's just corruption.


GavrielBA t1_iu101t0 wrote

I'd say most of problems stem from disconnection to nature and our evolutionary origins...


Artanthos t1_iu127wm wrote

Most of societies problems are that everyone expects everyone else to be just like they are.

Except for those that deserve to be beneath them. And there are always those that deserve to be beneath them.


Grandtheatrix t1_iu160o6 wrote

Not really. Most of societies problems derive from Capitalism. Capitalism is just feudalism by other means.

A small percentage of individuals control more wealth than 99% of the population combined. They have built a legal system that protects them and punishes any who threaten them. They have built a political system that cates to their needs at the expense of all others. They very rarely face anywhere close to the consequences the underclasses face for similar acts.

Within your average company, the worker receives a wage that they had little bargaining power to influence, and once hired, have little to no influence on business decisions. They do not get a Vote, and they do not share in Profits.

When your voice doesn't have any significant influence on Governmental policy or Workplace policy, you're a serf. Homelessness, Housing, Education, Immigration, Gender Equality, Racism, all of these issues are rooted in this hoarding of economic power. And the ruling class has, at every level, ensured that economic power rests in their hands alone.


Snarlynx t1_iu1ajhr wrote

Shame no one ever thought to treat others as they would want to be treated


fentown t1_iu1bbpz wrote

Society's problems derive from people holding leaders to a higher standard and being let down, consistently.


Readytodie80 t1_iu1g02m wrote

I'm not sure this is true it makes it seem like peoples laziness is the issue.


Kamquats t1_iu1hhr6 wrote

I mean, I'd say the main issue plaguing society is deep rooted issues baked into the foundations of our modern conceptions of how things should work. Like, this goes all the way back to Rome to be honest. Like, our conceptions of many things from how power structures should interact with the people to how we derive power to how inter-societal class differences are dealt with. These all stem from various places, times, and durations, but they all come back to influence us in some way


Me5hly t1_iu1m6i8 wrote

Most of my frustration with people in general is this. Amazing how many grown adult are incapable of admitting they are anything other than perfect, while everyone around them is constantly disappointing them.


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Invonnative t1_ity1sta wrote

Yet many problems exist because some don’t hold themselves to the standards that most do hold to, such as with litterers, murderers, rapists, etc. They are the misguided minority.


lcqjp t1_ity6v6w wrote

Oddly enough many murderers kill others bc they don't feel that the victims we're enough/doing things correctly, so its still inkeeping with the title in some ways


cannondave t1_itza8nk wrote

Like "stop invading other countries, ypu really shouldn't!". -citizens of the country responsible for most invasions


AkagamiBarto t1_itz7e77 wrote

Most of society problems come from a few people (rich, powerful) holding everyone else to lower standards than they hold themselves.

A few problems come from what you said tho.