Reality for me - expected to raise the younger kids while cooking, cleaning, yard work, mechanic, working in the woods, etc. I made sure to go to college and graduate school so I didn’t ever have to do any of this unless I wanted to. Results are good that I know how to do whatever I would want to do and sucks that my entire childhood was consumed by doing adult work. (BTW - I grew up saying I would never want kids because I knew how much work they were in raising them and stayed true to my word.)