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Yourfaceis-23 OP t1_j1x0npy wrote

Reply to comment by SuumCuique1011 in Kids realize what you did for them and appreciate it once they have kids of their own. Spouses or SOs don’t realize or appreciate it until you’re gone. by Yourfaceis-23

My ex thanks me often for all I do for our kids. My present boyfriend who’s kids live with us, not so much.

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SuumCuique1011 t1_j1x44yk wrote

That sucks and I'm sorry to hear that.

Part of the reason I don't want to start dating again is because our dynamic works for now and I don't feel the need to date. She's off doing her thing. I want to spend as much time as possible with my kid. He might get more angsty and hormonal at some point, but I want to at least build that solid base of trust and communication so that he can come to me to talk if he needs to.

It sounds like your ex isn't a total POS. I don't know your situation, but I would hope you guys can work together to keep that ball rolling.

I may be totally out of line here, but if you're already living with your new bf and his kids, you've got to have a mutual partnership and understanding with him and his kids.

You're a team living in the same household. Keeping a household running has to be a team effort, imho.

I wish you the best of luck.

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Jetztinberlin t1_j1z5g1w wrote

Then you have a boyfriend problem. I'm sorry. Have you discussed this with him?

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Yourfaceis-23 OP t1_j1z5uzd wrote

I have

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Jetztinberlin t1_j1z6aq2 wrote

If you've discussed it openly and plainly, and he understands you feel underappreciated and hasn't changed as a result, then... he's telling you making you feel appreciated isn't important to him. As you can see from the comments here, it is very possible for partners to show appreciation to each other. So you have a choice: maybe the lack of appreciation is a flaw in your relationship you can live with because other positive aspects balance it out, and maybe it's not.

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