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luv_____to_____race t1_j0mjicm wrote

My SIL is a 6' tall blonde, blue eyes, and married a 6'6" D1 defensive end, whi is a POC. Their first child is a boy who shot up to 6'9" and became interested in basketball. The youngest daughter grew to 6' and played basketball. The middle daughter is also 6', but went for volleyball. They are all light skin with big hair. The 2 that played basketball into college were very much into the black culture, while the volleyball player isn't. Just interesting to see how the different sports influences the person.


Persianator t1_j0mule3 wrote

This is known as peer group influence. There’s quite a bit of research that shows the group of people you grow up with are as important for a child’s development as the family unit.

There’s a lot of truth to the old saying of falling in with a bad crowd.

It’s why you see some people in prison who come from loving families but display psychopathic traits. If you’re around an environment that displays certain behaviors as normal and positive but in reality are anti-social, you and society are in for a bad time.

Obviously this can work in the inverse as well. Come from a rough background full of trauma and adversity, having an avenue that provides both physical and psychological safety can build resilience.

Be mindful of who you spent time around people, it can literally change the trajectory of your life.

Signed, Your friendly neighborhood psychologist


curiousarcher t1_j0qwz7v wrote

All of my BF’s friends are toxic AF. But they are from childhood and he won’t let them go. Wish that would change but honestly it’s one of the reasons I think I will make a change at some point. I don’t want those people in my life.

(Liars, cheaters, one of them is Mexican but racist towards black people and pretty much conspiracy theorists all around.) My bf isn’t like that, but of course no one escapes unscathed.


Britz10 t1_j0okh6m wrote

What do any of those abbreviations mean? SIL: sister in law POC: person of colour D1? Whi?


luv_____to_____race t1_j0p79ah wrote

Correct on the first 2. D1 is just division 1 college sports. Whi is a typo. It should be who.


Britz10 t1_j0p8iz5 wrote

Guess the way you wrote it confused me more than anything, her husband is supposed to be your brother, and you don't get the impression you're related.


luv_____to_____race t1_j0p99mg wrote

Sorry. I should have said my wife's sister.


Britz10 t1_j0p9nug wrote

Oh, I don't know why that never crossed my mind, makes a lot more sense why it was phrased like that.