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vorpalglorp t1_j0mzr5j wrote

I'm half Filipino and half Northern European, but I grew up in Southern California where EVERYONE and I mean EVERYONE thinks I'm Mexican. Now although my family has a very White American culture that is only part of who I am. You can't ignore what the world around you thinks you are. This has taken me decades to accept. When people make a B line to me hoping I speak Spanish it's not going to change the fact that it will keep happening. At some point you realize that you don't just represent who you are internally. To my external world I am a White washed Mexican and until I go in depth about how I'm not then that's superficially what I represent in public. So weird as it sounds I understand a good portion of what it's like to be Mexican American in America although it's not part of my genetic identity at all.

I also have a unique perspective of being inside the all White conversations where they don't think there are any Hispanic people around and I can tell you that most Mexican Americans dramatically underestimate the amount of racism that exists inside White families. In a way I envy that naïveté because I hear the racism and then I have to go out and feel the racism from the other side. Also I don't have the hispanic culture and pride to make me feel better about it. This is mainly why I've left Southern California. It sucks to constantly have to represent something you're not, but it's also impossible to ignore.