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wyecoyote2 t1_jampo0h wrote

Welcome to the Seattle freeze as it is called. Grew up here and other than some years in my 20s I've always lived here. Western WA is one of the most difficult areas to make friends I've lived. Easy to meet people talk but make friends outside of established relationships difficult.

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thejanuaryfallen t1_jamaqf1 wrote

Im originally from Chicago. Moved here 13 years ago. The real friends that I have been able to make out here are all from out of state who also have moved here. Lots of folks from the midwest. Easy to make friends.

Natives are a bit harder to make genuine connections with. But not impossible. Just takes more effort. I just think the older you get and the more divided we get with technology, its harder to make real friends anywhere.

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ComplexOk5954 OP t1_jambn2k wrote

That’s a good point, technology really changed the game..I always thought about moving to WA for a bit but the thought of not knowing anyone and the potential difficulty to make new friends and relationships scare me off

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[deleted] t1_jamc43g wrote

[deleted]

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ComplexOk5954 OP t1_jamd1ln wrote

Any pointers for a semi introvert on how to make friends in a new state?

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ruckus666 t1_jamey46 wrote

How have you made friends in your current state?

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ComplexOk5954 OP t1_jan2avj wrote

My current friends i made during school so it was a bit easier. Now that i am working FT it seems harder to meet people and be friends with them

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Nixx_Mazda t1_jan4t25 wrote

Welcome to adulting. Sucks sometimes, eh?

As to your original question, I'll let you know when it happens. I think it's mainly luck. Right place at the right time, and get your foot in the door somehow.

I met some people online. It started with group beers, progressed to hanging out together, house/cat sitting, good friends...but things change eventually. So back to the search...or not.

There might be a million people in the area that I'd consider hanging out with, but we're all too busy living our own lives to make serious time for someone new.

/shrug

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Ponsugator t1_janl3xr wrote

I think it’s easier with a hobby, try joining A local group with something you’re interested in. Even that can be hard. I’ve been here almost two years and have one or two friends but it’s even hard to get together

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junebuggery t1_jamtjdo wrote

This has been my experience too. Been here about a year and a half now. I feel like I'm finally making headway on making friends, and most of them are other transplants. Not because I'm actively seeking out other transplants...it just kinda happened that way.

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ComplexOk5954 OP t1_jan3mwi wrote

How did you meet them?

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junebuggery t1_jan5762 wrote

Basically online friend dating. Joined the Facebook group for my town and responded to a post someone else made looking to make friends. They seemed cool, so we met up at a local brewery and hit it off pretty well.

From there, that person has introduced me to their friend group.

I'm also starting a class tonight for a hobby I've been wanting to try, and I'm hopeful I'll meet some more people through that.

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ballastboy1 t1_jao4x6w wrote

Same. Transplants have been the only people willing to put in any effort for social interactions or consistent friendships.

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stinklynn t1_jao1caz wrote

I moved here in october and still don’t have 1 friend.

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ComplexOk5954 OP t1_jao2kpr wrote

That will be me once i move. We got this hooman!

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ConfusedCowplant t1_jatvxls wrote

My husband and I would like to admit to joining this group. We’re currently planning a move from Texas

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TimesThreeTheHighest t1_jaoux4w wrote

My advice: don't worry about making friends. Find people to help. Join activities. Stare at your phone less. Be open to everyone. Friends will come with time.

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ComplexOk5954 OP t1_jaovlj0 wrote

thats a good mind set, definitely need to step out my comfort zone and start doing this

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EtherPhreak t1_jap54if wrote

You say that, but to get the others out of their phones...

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TimesThreeTheHighest t1_jape8w1 wrote

I'm not saying it's easy, but I also think using the phone less is a step in the right direction. And there are already people doing this... you're just not going to find them online.

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Babagawhou t1_jaoa6m3 wrote

I moved to Vancouver at the end of 2019 and I have some of the best friends of my life. 10-12 great friends. Definitely had to put myself out there, though. Bumble BFF and Facebook groups were mostly how I found my people!

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ObsessiveTeaDrinker t1_jaoj80s wrote

A problem is that once you make good friends if they're transplants, they move away in a few years when they get priced out or go back to live near family.

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xXJustDanielleXx t1_jamopdj wrote

I moved here in 2019, so I had 1/2 friends before the government shut downs, and if we don’t count 2020 it’s say it took about 2 years to get connected to hobbies & organizations, but I had to seek those opportunities out. Spent time on meetup & eventbrite looking fir stuff to do too

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Deep_Seas_QA t1_jao9sxc wrote

I have been here for about five years and still have not made one friend!

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NLuce002 t1_jaof2b6 wrote

Moved to Camas, Washington in August. Still have ZERO local friends :( it’s my own fault tho. Haven’t been putting myself out there and I’ve been using my family here to fill the void of not having friends to hangout with

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1dad1kid t1_japkanl wrote

Really difficult to make friends, especially ones who will do things with you. I see friends in other states who have friends joining them on trips, etc., and I'm lucky if I can get one to meet up for coffee.

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SorroworroS t1_jaq6iri wrote

Need some local friends? My group is late 20's early 30's, go to a lot of shows, I'm always down to do somethin!

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docsocko t1_jav4lo3 wrote

Yeah none for me since july 2020 :/

Even the apt neighbors go out of their way to show me their horrible attitudes towards me for no reason. I'm from Colorado, quiet yet like to wave or say 'Hello' with a smile to show respect. Cats and dog are my friends now.

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Empty-Leadership-671 t1_jbhnoyz wrote

The "Seattle Freeze" is a real thing. People here don't want friends. They see them as liabilities.

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coccinelid t1_jc4lkvp wrote

DH I moved to just outside Seattle almost 2 years ago, and we got extraordinarily lucky. The neighborhood where we bought our house has a very active community club, and a neighbor who runs a microbrewery with regular events all summer long. We met our neighbor friends within the first couple months, and still hang out regularly.

I agree with other posters, finding community activities to take part in is a great way to meet people. Join a community choir/band/sport, go to meetups, find people with similar interests, and most importantly: exchange information. Be willing to ask people for their numbers/ social media contacts and then, perhaps the hardest part, contact them and invite them to do something with you. This may take several tries to organize something, but being willing to be the one to make plans and invite someone has been crucial to making social connections for me.

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