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Jyx_The_Berzer_King t1_j9tmzui wrote

Despite what many think of the abyss, that unlimited nothing below the world and all thought, I do not fear it. Friedrich Nietzsche is often quoted with that famous saying: "...if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you." I asked why such a thing was so terrible. Isn't an abyss simply a lack of everything but yourself? If anything it is a mirror, an echo chamber. At least, that is what I thought. I did look into the abyss, but it did not stop at gazing into me. It reached out with open arms and embraced me.

At the time I had been going through a lot of things: dying grandparents, parents finalizing their divorce, moving into an unfamiliar city to find work. I could tell I was stressed and unhappy, but what was i supposed to do except bear it? A friend espoused the wonders of meditation to me, so I tried it one weekend without any expectations.

That's how I found myself here, tired eyes decorated with bags looking into nothing, and a pair of arms darker than night holding me tenderly. I stood there, if you can call it standing without a floor, for a minute or two, allowing this small comfort to be. Then I realized how long it had been since I had gotten a simple hug. Three years, four? I couldn't tell, but decided it had been too long.

I sighed as my shoulders fell a little bit, making me wonder how long they'd been held up without my knowing. In fact I began to notice my whole body beginning to unwind. How had I not realized how tense I was? The arms rubbed up and down over my spine, gently swaying my body from side to side. I felt every ounce of strain leave me as though some unseen rain had washed it away.

Perhaps it really was raining, I felt water drip from my chin. A thumb gloved in twilight velvet traced from my chin to my eyes, swiping away the water. Oh, I'd begun crying without noticing it apparently. Maybe I had been worse off than I thought, if this was all it took to break the dam. The void simply pat my back, telling me without words that it was alright. I tried to hold back at first, but when I felt no judgement in this moment of vulnerability my attempts to rebuild a wall I didn't remember constructing ended up breaking it down even further.

Tears ran down my face without signs of stopping, my shoulders shook with my sobs. I allowed myself to acknowledge what I'd been pushing down. I missed my family, my dusty little town that I grew up in, my friends who I didn't talk to anymore. I missed my life before it became this scary thing I'd always heard about called "adulthood" that I hadn't realized would one day happen to me until it did. Through it all the abyss held me, and by this point I had wrapped my arms around whatever counted as its back as well. God, how tired I had been, still was.

As they always do my tears eventually dried up and I felt a little better after letting them out. My exhaustion had been replaced with a comfy tiredness, as though the abyss was some pickpocket who'd stolen my problems and left one of those little strawberry candies from my grandma's candy bowl in their place. I felt myself be swept off my feet in slow motion and rest upon a bed of moonlight; though, it must have been a new moon since I couldn't see the covers or pillows. Those arms were still wrapped firmly around me, and I drifted into a sleep deeper than any I'd slept before with the smallest of smiles brightening my face.

I woke up the next morning at peace. My problems still existed, but now felt much less heavy, easier to handle. My apartment, once so empty and dark, now felt inviting and lived-in, as if a friend was just in the other room. I didn't know what to call whatever had comforted me last night in my thanks, so I settled on a wordless feeling of gratitude and a smile with closed eyes in my quiet room. The phantom of warm arms encircled my chest again, a silent "you're welcome" from nothing.

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spindizzy_wizard t1_j9vssau wrote

I stand upon the very edge of one of the greatest precipices mankind has ever scaled.

"Fa.... T.... .. ... ...d." Falcon Three, do you read?

The signal is broken and distorted, the only reason I know what it says is familiarity with what should be heard at this time. I wish ACOM would be silent. It's far too early for clear communications. Besides, I'm busy staring into the abyss that starts at this precipice. Still, I understand their concern. If this works, mankind will have taken the biggest step into a new world that we have ever taken. The abyss is beautiful.

"Fa..on Th... do ... ...d." Falcon Three, do you read?

Still too broken; no point in responding now; they wouldn't hear me any better than I can hear them. The noise from the drive charging is still too great. It's nearly reached full charge, and when it does, the signal will be 99.999% clear. Gods, the depth of view into the abyss is incredible. I can actually see the distances to the stars, plot a course among them, and allow for proper motion, so I don't plow into any of them. The colors of the stars are clear and sharp; they counterpoint the beautiful, clean, empty abyss that separates us from the other stars.

"Falc.. ...ee do you ...d." Falcon Three, do you read?

Almost clear enough to respond. Please, James, give it a rest. I want to enjoy these few moments before I dive into the abyss and swoop freely between the stars at velocities that make the speed of light seem like a toddler's first few steps. The abyss seems as eager to greet me as I am to dive into it.

"Falcon Three, do you read?"

I'm tempted to let James hang. He's interrupted my contemplation too many times. Still, the signal is clear and understandable.

"ACOM, this is Falcon Three. How do you read?"

"Five By Five, Falcon Three! Good of you to get around to responding, Frank."

James' joy at hearing my voice is almost embarrassing. The slight bite in the following comment is understandable but misdirected.

"ACOM, Mission Schedule clearly indicates no ACOM during drive charging, so why are you surprised that it took me this long to respond? Charging started on schedule and just finished moments ago. The telemetry was good, wasn't it?"

I drag my attention away from the abyss. There are procedures to follow before I can fly free. I start the checklists. The chatter between ACOM and myself becomes crisp and professional. The checklists roll off one after the other without a hitch, and I am elated.

"Falcon Three. Frank, are you clear?"

"ACOM. James, I am clear. I am clearly ready to GET ON MY WAY! FALCON IS GO!"

"Falcon Three, we read you five by five; ACOM is GO! All Stations! Report ready on your channel!"

Waiting for the stations to respond is delicious torture. There's no reason for anyone to call "hold" or, worse, "abort," but you never know until the litany is done.

"Network is Go!" Good, no glitches with the communications network.

"Guidance is Go!" The in-system beacons are all responding as expected; I won't hit anything on my way out or back in.

"Engineering is Go!" I knew that already. The telltales on board would give warning long before they did, but then again, it's a new technology, so having the wizards who dreamed it up checking for anything out of nominal is good for my nerves.

"Environment is Go!" Same for the environmental systems. It wouldn't do to run out of oxygen on my maiden flight.

"Surgeon is Go!" That's the one that worried me. I can tell my heart rate is way higher than normal. I'm so ready for this that the surgeon could have yanked me for being too ready.

"Acom is GO!" James is paying attention to the detailed list of stations and checking them off. No low-level issues are being ignored, or he would have called for clarification.

"Commander is Go!" My god, am I ever ready to go! The abyss looks warm and inviting after all this training.

"Procedures is Go!" Nit-picking a specialty, he must be feeling the pressure to go as well, or he would have found something to complain about.

"Director is Go!" Thank god, the final voice agrees.

"ACOM, Spreading the wings!" The ship spreads its wings, but it feels like they're my wings. I can feel them bite into the fabric of space. Leibnitz may have been more right than we knew, but he still didn't have the last word.

"Wing Lock! See you around the redshift, James! LAUNCH!"

I am poised with perfect confidence over the abyss, that void of deep darkness that so many have described as cold and making one feel insignificant. Yet for me, the abyss is warm, my natural habitat, and I feel like a swallow as I swoop and swirl between the stars. The Abyss reaches out and hugs me close, and I am free of all the earthly bonds save one.

"Acom? James? You have got to get out here with me. The abyss hugs you close, and you cannot fall no matter what you do."

Silence is my only response.

"ACOM, do you read?"

Reluctantly, I turn back from my flight and make for home, but my home is properly in the abyss now. They will clip my wings and ground me for deviating from the flight plan. I have to tell them it's okay. The abyss loves all who come to share the view.

"ACOM, do you read?"

I curve between the stars, looking for that one yellow star with a blue-white planet. There it is!

"ACOM, do you read?"

"Falcon Three! Read you five by five! What happened?!?"

"ACOM, the drive works better than anyone thought! Transmitting black box recorders!"

The data sings through the tiny sliver of the void that separates me from my former home, and I can hear James exclaiming with delight and fear at the tremendous velocities I reached.

"ACOM, there is no need for fear. The abyss loves company. It wants to share the view with us! Get in your ship and come with me!"

"Falcon Three. This is the director. You will return to Earth Station immediately."

His voice is dead and cold; he is not a pilot and cannot tolerate zero gravity.

"What for, Director? So you can clip my wings and make me stay on the ground? No. I will explore the galaxy and maybe the universe as well. Look at the data! I have been to the core and come back in minutes!"

"Frank, please! You're delusional. The flight record shows that you have not exceeded the speed of light."

"No, Director. I have seen the stars fly past so fast that I felt like a sparrow dodging raindrops. Check the stellar data. We have clear views and records of all the stars from here to the core and back! James! Tell him!"

"Director, ACOM here. The scientists are going crazy with joy over the data we've received. We have real-time records of the flight. I do not give a good goddamn what the velocity indicator says since I can SEE the data from the core with my own eyes right now! You ask Surgeon!"

((continued))

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spindizzy_wizard t1_j9vt7i1 wrote

"Surgeon, Director, Report!"

"Director, while I will agree that James is somewhat euphoric, the records he transmitted clearly show the path from Sol to the Core and back. The velocity indicator is either broken or there's something fundamental about interstellar flight that we do not understand. My strongest recommendation is to allow James to continue his flight, while he returns to Earth frequently to share the data he recovers. It is not in the best interests of humanity, this project, or James, to curtail a flight so successful that is returning so much valuable data. Let the man fly!"

"Surgeon, you know the rules. He has to come back. He has to go through an evaluation. The board has to rule on his fitness to continue flying. Right now, he's euphoric, rebellious, and determined to continue flying no matter what. That's not going to go well with the board regardless of the data he's returning."

Return to that cold dead space called Earth? No! I cannot do that! Only, the abyss hugs me warmly, and shows me how I can rejoin it in flight anytime I wish. I cannot be held.

"Director? I'll return, for a time, but I will fly free again, and no man may deny me."

FALCON THREE FLIGHT REPORT SUMMARY

THE FALCON PROJECT MUST CONTINUE AS IT HAS PROVIDED INVALUABLE DATA TO HUMANITY. PILOT JAMES SKYWALKER HAS SUFFERED AN EMOTIONAL TRAUMA MAKING HIM UNFIT FOR CONTINUED FLIGHT. HIS DECLARATION THAT HE WILL FLY AGAIN REGARDLESS OF ANY RULING IS SUFFICIENT TO GROUND HIM FOR LIFE AS MENTALLY UNFIT TO ENTRUST WITH ANY MISSION. SURGEON AND ENVIRONMENTAL ARE DIRECTED TO EXAMINE THE RECORDS OF THE FLIGHT AND DEVELOP SHIELDING AGAINST WHATEVER EFFECT HAS SO DAMAGED A GREAT PILOT AND HUMAN BEING. WE WILL REMEMBER JAMES SKYWALKER'S FLIGHT WITH REVERENCE, AND WITH CARE FOR THE HEALTH OF FUTURE PILOTS. JAMES SKYWALKER IS REMANDED TO THE LUNAR HOSPITAL FOR EXTENDED CARE AS HIS PHYSICAL STATE IS PROFOUNDLY UNHEALTH WITHIN THE ONE GRAVITY FIELD OF EARTH. IT IS HOPED THAT WITH CONTINUED CARE AND TREATMENT HE WILL RETURN TO NORMAL SOCIETY. FALCON PROJECT WILL CONTINUE, IN JAMES SKYWALKERS' NAME.

LONG LIVE PROJECT SKYWALKER.

LUNAR HOSPITAL REPORT ON JAMES SKYWALKER

JAMES SKYWALKER'S APPEARANCE WHEN HE RETURNED TO LUNAR HOSPITAL FROM HIS SOJOURN ON EARTH WAS A TERRIBLE SHOCK TO THE ENTIRE STAFF. WE DO NOT KNOW WHAT HE WAS SUBJECTED TO ON EARTH, BUT IT VERY NEARLY KILLED HIM. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES WILL WE PERMIT JAMES SKYWALKER TO RETURN TO EARTH FOR ANY REASON. HIS OBVIOUS JOY AT BEING BACK IN SPACE WAS LIMITED SOMEWHAT BY THE UNDERSTANDING THAT HE WAS NOT TO PILOT AGAIN, BUT HE REMAINED IN GOOD SPIRITS SAYING, "LET ME SEE THE DEEP BLACK OF THE ABYSS AGAIN, AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME." WE DEEM IT REASONABLE TO ALLOW HIM TO ACCESS THE SURFACE IN A LUNAR SUIT IF FOR NO OTHER REASON THAN TO ALLOW HIM TO SEE FOR HIMSELF THAT HE CANNOT FLY BETWEEN THE STARS WITHOUT A SHIP. IT MAY DISAPPOINT HIM, BUT IT IS THE SUREST WAY TO GET HIM TO UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT HE BELIEVES IS AN ILLUSION.

LUNAR HOSPITAL SECURITY REPORT ON JAMES SKYWALKER DISAPPEARANCE

THIS REPORT IS UTTERLY FACTUAL. ANY CLAIMS TO THE CONTRARY WILL BE SUMMARILY IGNORED.

JAMES SKYWALKER, WITH THE AGREEMENT OF THE LUNAR HOSPITAL STAFF, WAS PERMITTED TO DON A LUNAR SURFACE SUIT AND EXIT THE HABITAT ON THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON. THIS IS A COMMON TASK PERFORMED EVERY DAY BY STAFF OF THE SKYWALKER PROJECT COMMUNICATIONS NETWORK AS THEY PERFORM MAINTENANCE ON THE NETWORK EQUIPMENT. THERE IS NO WAY FOR ANYONE TO DEPART THE LUNAR SURFACE AT ANY VELOCITY WITHOUT AN IMMEDIATE RETURN (IN SECONDS) WITH ONLY THE RESOURCES OF A LUNAR SURFACE SUIT.

LUNAR SURFACE SUITS ARE NOT EQUIPPED WITH FALCON/SKYWALKER PROJECT COMMUNICATORS.

LUNAR SURFACE SUITS ARE NOT EQUIPPED WITH FALCON/SKYWALKER DRIVES.

LUNAR SURFACE SUITS ARE NOT EQUIPPED WITH LIFE SUPPORT GOOD FOR MORE THAN EIGHT HOURS NOMINAL, WITH UP TO FOUR HOURS IN THE EMERGENCY RESERVE PER EMERGENCY SURVIVAL PROTOCOL.

JAMES SKYWALKER'S SUIT WAS CLEARLY SEEN BY THE SECURITY TEAM ESCORTING HIM, AND AS SHOWN IN THE RECORDINGS ATTACHED, TO EXTEND SKYWALKER DRIVE WINGS ONE HOUR INTO HIS PLANNED TWO-HOUR EXCURSION. THIS FACT IS UNDENIABLE.

JAMES SKYWALKER'S VOICE CAME UP OVER THE SKYWALKER COMMUNICATIONS LINK AT THE SAME TIME, AS PROVEN BY THE RECORDINGS ATTACHED, AND REMAINED ACTIVE FOR A TOTAL OF FOURTY-EIGHT HOURS, RETURNING DATA ON A CIRCUMNAVIGATION OF THE MILKYWAY GALAXY AT AN AVERAGE CONSTANT DISTANCE FROM THE CORE ALONG THE ARBITRARY GALACTIC EQUATOR EQUAL TO THE DISTANCE FROM SOL TO THE ARBITRARY GALACTIC CORE.

A COMPARISON OF THE DATA RECEIVED MATCHES THE KNOWN PLANETARY DATA RETRIEVED OVER THE LAST FIFTY YEARS, PROVING THAT THE DATA IS NOT FAKED.

SKYWALKER VOLUNTARILY RETURNED TO THE SURFACE, WITH SUCH A REJUVENATED APPEARANCE THAT THE HOSPITAL STAFF HAVE STATED HE MAY TAKE OUT A LUNAR SURFACE SUIT ANY TIME HE WISHES, WITH THE PROVISO THAT IT BE EQUIPPED WITH ADDITIONAL BIOLOGICAL SENSORS TO RECORD WHAT HAPENS WHEN HE GOES FASTER THAN LIGHT.

EARTH SECURITY COUNCIL DIRECTIVE #1945667

UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES WILL ANY FURTHER FTL FLIGHTS BE ATTEMPTED FOR ANY REASON. FTL FLIGHT HAS SHOWN A DISTURBING TENDENCY TO GENERATE ABBERANT BEHAVIOR IN THE PILOTS WHO HAVE ATTEMPTED IT. ALL DATA RECOVERED FROM SUCH FLIGHTS IS TO BE PURGED FROM ALL PUBLIC RECORDS.

((continued))

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spindizzy_wizard t1_j9vt9ep wrote

The Skywalker/Goreman Incident

"Hello, Frank."

"Hello, James," sigh, "you certainly succeeded in one thing, James."

"And what would that be, Frank?"

"You've single-handedly shut down all FTL flight for the foreseeable future."

James laughs, "So! They issued that idiot directive? Well, Frank, it's even better that you've come to Lunar Hospital to see me, we're going to go on the surface and try an experiment."

"Is the staff in agreement?" Frank is both concerned and amused.

"Entirely. You look beat to pieces, if this works, you'll look like a million dollars."

"So what are we going to do?"

"Put on our lunar suits and go for a walk on the darkside. Beyond that, we'll see."

...

"James?"

"Yes, Frank?"

"It's awfully dark out there, isn't it."

"Yes. But it's a great place to go and live too."

"What do you mean?"

"Stare into the dark, think how much you want to go exploring, see the other stars, see other worlds, go where no one else has gone before."

"Like the old T.V. show?"

"Maybe. But maybe space will be more welcoming than it was in the show. Let's just sit and meditate on how much we want to go see the universe."

...

"James? She wants us to come join her."

"Yes, Frank, she does."

"How can we do that? We don't have a ship."

"We don't need a ship anymore, Frank. Watch me."

...

"James, how did you do that?"

"I wanted to fly, so I thought of the Falcon Wings and imagined they were there."

"And it worked?"

"Did you see me lift off and go flying? Are you still hearing me but through the Falcon Network?"

"Yes, and yes."

"Then it worked. I believe you can do this Frank. I believe that the abyss, that gloriously illuminated void between the stars, wishes to share what it sees with everyone who yearns to see it." James appears before Frank. "Take my hand, Frank. Let's go see what the abyss has to show us." Frank takes James' hand, and Falcon Wings appear.

"So that's how you do it." With wonder in his voice, "Race you to Andromeda, James!"

((continued))

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spindizzy_wizard t1_j9vtcnu wrote

TREASON TRIAL OF LUNAR HOSPITAL DIRECTOR

"With all due respect to the government, Your Honor, and with nothing but respect for the law, this court, and your office, there is no basis for a trial of treason. Treason is the betrayal of the country to a foreign power. There is no foreign power involved. Therefore there can be no treason."

"Your Honor, the defense is clearly ignoring the breach of a security council directive."

"Objection, Your Honor. The directive mentioned specific data and said nothing about the dissemination of information regarding healing individuals who suffer from a condition that we now know is not a disease, but an invitation to explore the universe."

"And thereby committed treason by sending untrained and uncleared individuals into the void to meet only god knows what fate, spreading information that the security council long ago decided should be kept secret for the safety of the human race."

"Since every explorer who has returned clearly stated that there were no other lifeforms, again, there can be no treason. Your Honor, the facts of the matter here are that the Security Council fears the loss of their personal power and nothing else. They seek to bend the legal system to shut the mouths of anyone who dissents from the government. This is not a proper use of the legal system in our humble opinion, and we ask the court to summarily dismiss all charges."

The judge bangs his gavel, "If you two will allow a poor country judge to get a word in edgewise...?" A glare bathes both of the lawyers, "Some people will say that I should recuse myself because I am the grandfather of James Skywalker. I say that's bullshit. James has spoken to me of what he has discovered, across all the galaxies that he and Frank Goreman have explored. To the best of his knowledge, we are the sole intelligent lifeform other than the Abyss, as he puts it, and the Abyss only wishes to share the glorious views of the universe that it has created. You might as well say that the Abyss is god, and we are being invited to join the party."

"Objection, Your Honor. You should recuse yourself. You have been unduly influenced by a pair of unbalanced minds that should never have been permitted to leave Lunar Hospital under any circumstances, a case which is already being tried under a different court."

"Overruled, you deliberately moved that court case out of this circuit to avoid having me on the panel. In any case, I have it on good authority that your case in that court is just as weak and sloppy as your case in this court. All charges are summarily dismissed, and the Government is reminded that it is not above the law, so any further cases filed on this matter, no matter how styled, in this or any other circuit, are considered automatically frivolous and will result in contempt of court charges of thirty days for each charge and ninety days for each case, to run consecutively and applied to every member of the prosecution. This court is adjourned!" Banging the gavel sharply.

((finis))

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