I think this year has been a magical one, my boyfriend of 5 years proposed to me, and we got married in the spring. He has been a helpful distraction after my mother passed away late last year. I never thought she was mentally unstable considering how happy she was when I told her Ethan proposed. All she left for us was a note, "Which me is the real me? The one that stares back, or me?"

Me and my siblings cleaned out her house after the funeral. Most of her stuff we sold at a yard sale. I only wanted one of the family pictures she had in her bedroom. As I was leaving, I walked past her large dressing mirror she had next to the dresser. Out of the corner of my eye I thought I saw a smaller figure in the mirror but when I went back it was just me. *Strange* I thought. Since the mirror had my attention, I decided to take it home since I didn't have one yet in our new house.

That night I had a dream, I was a little girl again, I had no shoes, I stink, and two adults who I assume to be my parents were arguing in the kitchen. Whatever language they were speaking I did not know. I decided I wanted to wash my hair, so I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror.

My husband kissed me on the cheek, "Hey you ready we were gonna go try that new breakfast place down the street." I had no memory of waking up from bed. I was just standing in front of that mirror getting dressed. "Yea, sorry must of been daydreaming." I fix my hair and spend a nice weekend day with my husband.

Night two, once again a child. I have a new bruise on my left cheek. My mother has locked herself in the bedroom and my dad is hugging me and sounding apologetic. He nudges me to the bathroom. I look in the mirror and notice the bruise large enough to resemble a fist.

I hold my foundation brush against my face. "You done with your makeup yet, hon? The bar is only open this late on Sundays, I got to work tomorrow let's go." This time the entire day has gone by, no memory of the day. I am just standing in front of that mirror getting ready for a night out. "Yea just daydream about how nice you look all dressed up." That gets a nice smile out of him. I finish putting the foundation on my left cheek and we head out.

Night three, my father is nowhere to be seen my mother seems to be doing better, that's good, I think. She has made dinner, some bread, and beans. This dream family must not be well off, makes sense why I am dressed the way I am. She sets the plate right in front of me and starts to cut the bread. That is when I noticed she had mumbled something. Suddenly she turns the bread knife towards me in a swiping motion and it grazes my cheek.

I fall from my chair as she screams at me. The burning in my cheek drives my adrenaline as I race to my feet and sprint to the only place I know in this world, the bathroom. I gaze in the mirror, "let me out!" I scream. I want this nightmare to end. I remember today is Monday. My husband who is normally there next to me has already left for work. My mother pounds against the bathroom door, eventually overcoming my small child's strength. I gaze into the mirror one more time please, I beg.

I'm sitting on the floor covered in sweat, my heart is pacing, and I begin to cry tears of happiness being back in reality. A voice speaks out from the mirror, "You owe me you know" I look up to see that small child standing in the mirror. "Who are you?" I ask. "I'm you, the one who takes your place in reality so you can calm yourself in that perfect dream world you live in." Confusion wells in me, "What do you mean dream world? This is reality I'm married; I just got a new home; my life is perf-." The child cuts me off, "You're wrong, that world is one you fabricated to escape the hell that is reality. But reality never stops so I take your place. But frankly I think your time has run out." I scream at the mirror. "No... I won't... I won't go back!" I punch the mirror; it shatters to pieces and masks itself in a red hue of my blood.

I refuse to sleep; I refuse to look in another mirror for fear of going back. I like this life and I want to live it. I don't care what reality is, this is the one I choose. My husband still isn't home, maybe my mind is starting to disassemble this dream. I decide to take control and make myself sleep, for good.